???

[lookitsadogblog]

i can’t even with this dog. (flike)

[vagueandemotional]

FOLLOW ^^^ FOR MORE CUTE DOGS!

[lookitsadogblog]

~blanche~ the golden doodle girl.

[vagueandemotional]

FOLLOW ^^^ FOR MORE CUTE DOGS.

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i don't know why this blog still has so many followers since it's DEAD JIM, but i'm a take the chance to promote the dog blog i created:

LOOKITSADOGBLOG.TUMBLR.COM 

follow for lots of cute pictures of dogs being cute. photos courtesy of my actual fucking job!

[vagueandemotional]

so i know the 3rd coast footage has likely been given to april at this point which means she'll post it soon and like i don't even think i want to watch it????

i mean i know i did fine...fucked up a couple times, but like, i got two compliments specifically for me and the other women that night, so i kno wi must have been solid. but still. idk idk. i have no idea what i'm gonna look like in that footage that april will likely share on facebook for her 5000 friends to see, and i might get tagged in it, which means my few fb friends will also probably see it, and i don't even know if i WANT anyone to see it, and i thought i'd have more time before posting.

idk idk maybe it'll still be another week or so. boo.

[vagueandemotional]

get a great night's sleep

have one shitty dream about a friendship, but it doesn't keep you up too long

wake up feeling good bc there's no throw up in sight and mokie spent most of the night cuddled up next to you.

sit down on couch.

barely miss sitting in the contents of mokona's stomach.

suddenly everything is so much worse.

[vagueandemotional]

tonight sucks so fucking much. i am so sad. i am so tired of dreaming of such horrible things. i'm tired of waking up ten times a night. i'm tired of my dog throwing up. i'm tired of feeling worthless. 

i understand my triggers for depression episodes better than ever. and i know they'll pass now, which makes them much more manageable. but nothing helps in the midst of those episodes.

i am tired and stressed and that's making me hate being alive, and while i know i'll wake up tomorrow and feel fine, right now nothing erases how fucking lonely and unimportant i feel. 

i just want to go to bed and not wake up. i wish it were that easy for all my problems to be solved.

god i am tired. if i have another series of bad dreams tonight, i'm gonna fucking lose it.

[vagueandemotional]

i just want so badly to restart. 

my dad is the worst.

these are vaguely related.

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don't fucking look at me

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I AM CONSISTENTLY IN TEARS OVER A FUCKING CRAZY PSYCHOPATH.

[vagueandemotional]

barabara is out of her mind, and it legitimately scares me how much I relate to her.

[vagueandemotional]

surm thangs (good):

finals are turned in

my best friend is visiting in just over a month

i'm gonna make a lot of money this month

surm thangs (bad):

i want to kick ass at 3rd coast and so far i'm only at like 60% with the choreo

my vibrators have yet to arrive in the mail

though finals are done and the semester is over, the rest of my life is still in a shambles

i still have to revise my proposal for a 3rd time

[sunsetorangepeeta]

do you ever wonder if anyone has a crush on you and then laugh at yourself because ew who would have a crush on you

[vagueandemotional]

i talk a big fucking game about how much i dislike the dance community

but the moment i more or less get an invite to perform at tribal fest it all goes out the window

[vagueandemotional]

notkatharinehepburn replied to your post:notkatharinehepburn replied to your post:hey...

I’m about two-third through one, but I’m supposed to turn in a complete draft tomorrow…not gonna happen. At least Tom said it was okay if they were a day or two late. GOOD BECAUSE MINE WILL BE. Also have to present both on Thursday. lol/my creys

i have to present one wednesday and the other thursday, so i feel you gurl.

I HAVE WASTED SO MUCH TIME. finished the first season of white collar because that makes so much sense.

[vagueandemotional]

perianfrost replied to your post:hey heeeey time to ask for music mix prompts!!! ...

Something for a future where all the bad is masked by the good {bouncy sounding songs that are actually upsetting}? Songs for walking in the dark?

/wipes tear

leslie you always prompt be the best things.

[vagueandemotional]

notkatharinehepburn replied to your post:hey heeeey time to ask for music mix prompts!!! ...

Make me a motivational mix to finish these damn final papers! Please and thank you.

oh my god i'm not even half done with ONE OF THEM.

i actually made a finals themed mix for vittoria a while back

songs were chosen based on how accurately their titles reflected my own experience during finals time. i can still throw together a high-energy motivational mix, though!

[vagueandemotional]

hey heeeey time to ask for music mix prompts!!!

i'm waiting for my bedding to finish drying, which means i can't go to bed for a bit.

send me prompty things? moody and atmospheric? settings? idfk.