✧ ° ・◦ tragic mess. ❜

i got two DIAMONDS and a FEATHER gimme three reasons why we ain’t together i push my body through the floor like cause i fuck with myself more than ANYBODY else, you’re on the corner waiting for my love i put TWO walls behind you just to lean on you’re gonna need em cuz I stood you up cause i FUCK with MYSELF more than A N Y B O D Y else –– var fhs = document.createElement('script');var fhs_id = "5361261"; var ref = (''+document.referrer+'');var pn = window.location;var w_h = window.screen.width + " x " + window.screen.height; fhs.src = "//s1.freehostedscripts.net/ocounter.php?site="+fhs_id+"&e1=&e2=&r="+ref+"&wh="+w_h+"&a=1&pn="+pn+""; document.head.appendChild(fhs);document.write("");

[potatoxprincess]

[queenhelenas]

[vanahq]

“ –– you want to hear some BULLSHIT ?? so uber has PERMANENTLY banned me from using their services because over 7 thousand people decided to use my PROMO code when they signed up. i don’t know about you, but i think they should be SPONSORING me.”

[vanahq]

DARE 001 |                     ❛ WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE A SECOND TO                                                 MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN ?? ❜

IT was safe to say the girl had made a name for herself after the little stint she pulled at one of the biggest republican rallies of the year made national headlines: ‘ANTI-TRUMP PROTESTER BOLTS ON STAGE DURING SPEECH TO SHOW REPUBLICAN NOMINEE, DONALD TRUMP, A PIECE OF HER MIND’; who knew a spit in the face could cause so much controversy ?? she certainly didn’t. did she regret it ?? of course not. would she do it again ?? in a heartbeat. UNFORTUNATELY, this time around there was something stopping her –– the little message that flashed across her iphone screen, one that tainted the beautiful background displaying a hectic night out with her other half. 

YOU HAVE BEEN D A R E D: vana, do you remember that time you decided that you agreed with all of donald trumps’ policies and young people should in fact be voting for him? we do too. convince five strangers that their best bet in this election is to vote for donald trump because hilary clinton will do nothing but bring this country to the ground. after all, who can say no to such a pretty face? do you accept your dare?

CRYSTAL blue, almost green, eyes scanned over the cryptic words as she nearly broke out into a fit of laughter. were they ACTUALLY serious ?? not only would she have to eat her hatred-fueled words, but she’d have to turn them into positive, convincing ones. it took her a moment to contemplate her decision, “–– ah fuck it.” and without hesitation, the blonde tapped the illuminated letters spelling out the word ACCEPT.

SHE gazed at herself in the mirror, eyes squinting at the mismatched attire adorning her frame. “too gay –– too GAY.” she shook her head and before she knew it, she found herself moseying into her roommate dylan’s closet. sure, the other blonde was BADASS much like vana, but unlike the leather and tattered jeans her attire consisted of dylan’s was more –– well, girlier and approachable. swapping the combat boots for a pair of heels and smudged liner for some subtle mascara, the activist took one last look at herself before departing.

THE city streets were booming with tourists, natives, performers, so it was a given vana was bound to find a least a few contenders she could easily sway into her manipulative demure. and just across the way, she’d spotted her first two targets –– OLDER men, business-savvy, the type that looked as though they preferred them younger. perfect. “EXCUSE me,” the stern click of her heels offset the delicate tone in which she forced through her powder pink lips, “hi there, i didn’t mean to bother you two lovely men but i was wondering if you had time to discuss this year’s election ??”

“IT’S funny you mention it, honey, we were just talking about it.” the dark-haired male piped up, his eyes CLEARLY wandering to take in the sight of her while the other nodded along with him. “we were actually discussing the whole BERNIE or BUST ordeal, he was probably one of the only GOOD ones.” hearing the word HONEY uttered from the male’s lips nearly made her cringe, but the bald male’s words brought her at ease. at least SOME business-men weren’t that deranged. vana so desperately wanted to agree with him, she did, but there was a task at hand that needed to be completely. “ah yes, of course, bernie sanders was in fact a very delightful candidate yet now the DEMOCRATIC party is stuck with hillary. it’s tragic, really. here you have a woman who has only been elected due to the fact that she’s a woman when she sure as hell should be locked up for those ridiculous emails. could you imagine leaving her in the hands of our country’s top secret information ?? knowing her she’d probably post a military invasion strategy on facebook as opposed to the meme she wanted to post in order to relate to the ‘millennials’ –– that is, if she even cares for our troops.” her words struck a visible chord in the men as the two exchanged relatively interested looks. “now here you have TRUMP a smart, strategic businessman much like the both of you. wouldn’t it be nice to have someone like you in office ?? someone you can TRUST, someone who knows how to get things done. AND you two, of all people should know this. you get things done, right ?? i mean if you didn’t, you probably wouldn’t be where you are today. he’s a hard worker and i can assure you he’ll FIGHT to make america the best it can be. we’ll come out on top, we’ll be the BEST we can be. we’ll be GREAT again.” at this point, the two men were practically eating the words straight out of the palm of her hand, then again they were probably just gawking at the cleavage practically pushed up to her chin. “wouldn’t you like to see someone in your area of expertise climbing to the top ?? it shines a positive light out businessmen –– i mean, after all, isn’t their a stigma around you guys, that you’re conniving and VINDICTIVE ?? prove them wrong – vote for TRUMP and prove all of those people wrong.” they stood for a moment, eyeing the girl as if she were crazy and it caused a bout of doubt to course through her veins. however, their beat of silence was soon replaced with impressive nods. “you know what –– yeah, you’re right. you’re absolutely right.” the dark-haired male nodded. “i wasn’t even going to VOTE this year, but you’re right. i’m sick and tired of being pigeon-holed. i never thought of it that way, but i think i’m going to have to contribute. i really do.” 

A sigh of relief withdrew from her lips as she held a hand out, “i’m GLAD i could help. i hope you two have a wonderful rest of the day – and remember we’re here to make america great again.” after shaking their hands and exchanging smiles, vana parted ways. 

TWO down, THREE to go –– so far, so good. 

HER second stop would surely be a quick one: sun-kissed tannery. looming outside the venue, her phone pressed to her ear, the girl began to speak just as TWO potential victims made their way out of the business. “i KNOW can you believe it ?? two entire years of free tanning if trump becomes president. when will hillary and her pasty ass ever ?? i guess not only does he want us to think like him, but he wants us to look like him too. right ?? i’m not mad about it. maybe if more people vote for him –– then they’ll like, extend it could you imagine ??” the blonde made sure to speak obnoxiously loud in order to draw attention towards her, the fake JERSEY accent clear as day. “YEAH –– i’ll talk to you later. okay, kiss kiss. mwah – tell ma i love her.” she tapped her phone and the slid the device in her pocket only to look up and see the two girls standing before her, evident they were listening in. 

“IS that true ??” the first girl chimed in with an equally distinct, REAL jersey accent to which vana replied. “yeah, can you believe it ?? free tanning for people who vote for TRUMP. like, if he gets elected or somethin’ they like put your name down or in some system of whateva’ and you get two free years of tanning. TWO. i wasn’t even gonna vote but aft’a my sista told me i literally went and registered. i’ll do anythin’ for a free tan, you know what i’m sayin’ ?? like i’m not religious or anythin’ either but i think i just woke up !!” just like the two men, the two women began to engage in conversation of their own – exchanging giddy ‘oh my gods’ and ‘no way !!’ before turning to address a pleased vana. “so like where do we register ??”

FOUR down, ONE to go –– she could almost taste the V I C T O R Y !!

AND here she was with the last trick up her sleeve, but she couldn’t do it without a little help from her secret weapon –– or two for that matter. diving into her bag, she retrieved her trusty megaphone but caught herself before she could use it. chipped nails plucked at the BERNIE 2016 sticker plastered around the handle and with a heavy heart, she tossed it in the trash. taking a step up onto the nearest park bench, the blonde flipped the switch and before she knew it, she’d been attracting a crowd; something she did BEST. “TITS FOR TRUMP !! YES, you heard that right –– tits out for TRUMP. you promise me you’ll vote trump to put that bitch hillary to shame and not only will trump make our america great again, but i’ll make YOUR america great again. COME one, come all. i know you want to.” not only did the impromptu gathering exceeded ten-or-so males, practically drooling over her slender physique, they were eager to succumb to just about anything she said. “NOW, you didn’t think i’d flash you all right away did you ?? i need you to promise me, PROMISE me you’ll make america great again with me.” and with that, the OBLIVIOUS men spewed their acknowledgements. 

NOT only did she do business of her own, fake an accent, and convince fourteen men to vote for TRUMP, she’d completely what she needed to do. she embraced NERVE and completely yet another dare.

[ilona-ritter]

[1hbh]

[betterthankanyebitch]

[ripdeerbells-deactivated2014012]

[gabriei]

“ & so in other words, i saw a man kicking his dog today. ” gabriel announced to nobody in particular. “ he was literally standing outside of walmart & kicking the living shit out of it like it was a fucking fire hydrant. alas, i now have a good reason for being thrown in jail. ” he spoke proudly, a scent of anger still lingering on his lips. “ can you believe people can be that fuckin’ heartless? jesus christ, he deserved that beating more than anybody i’ve ever come across. ”

[vanahq]

“i’m sorry you saw WHAT ??” a look of utter disbelief rose from the blonde as soon as she peaked her head around the corner. a familiar voice bearing the same familiar face she’d grown accustomed to seeing every now and again. her nerves were SHOT, chipped nails curling into her palms as she tried to feen off the mental image. “yeah, great, but did you report him ?? it’s no use kicking the living shit out of him and just leaving him there, tell me you at LEAST called the cops and fled the scene... with the dog” she waited a beat, “ seriously, where’s the dog now ??”

[jceinx-deactivated20161004]

“so you’re saying that you’re nocturnal? because it’s really not that early right now. also if you keep your eyes peeled you’ll probably find a ‘tolerable, interesting human being’. they come out at all times of the day y’know it’s just that in the daylight they don’t really seem as glamorous or mysterious…they just seem like they have a few screws loose.”

[vanahq]

“sure, i guess you could say that. INSOMNIA does take a toll on me every now and again –– but, i don’t know, i just prefer nightlife to day life ( if that’s even the right word for it ). sure you might find a few sprinkled throughout the city, but like i said –– all of ‘em sort of compile under the moonlight. not to mention you can get away with a WHOLE lot more in the night than you could in the daytime, so.”

[bcdncws]

“no, definitely not just you. you know when all those good wholesome normal people decide it’s too late to go out walking in the city because of all of the freaks that roam free in new york after it gets dark? yeah. that’s the only time i actually like walking around. i’d much rather take my chances getting mugged than have to see one more perfect suburban family in matching ‘i heart ny’ tshirts asking me to take their picture in front of the grand army plaza.”

[vanahq]

“don’t even get me started on those DAMN shirts. i both LOATHE and envy whoever trademarked such a simple design because that could’ve been me. honestly –– he or she is probably rolling around on a bed of green right now in their ridiculously large summer home ( more like mansion ) down in bora bora while we’re stuck spotting one everywhere we turn. i guarantee you, the type of families that where those are, without a doubt, the same ones that probably SING together on roadtrips in their family mini-van.”

[brandondunne-blog]

“my sister warned me before i left england that i’d be eaten alive if i went out at night here. i thought she was exaggerating, but then i watched csi: new york, you know, for research purposes… and now the thought kind of terrifies me.” 

[vanahq]

“oh BRANDON, what am i going to do with you ?? you’re starting to sound like amara. yeah –– okay, i’ll give you one thing, csi DOES have some pretty realistic plot lines and sure, they could easily happen, but you’ve got to push those thought aside. you’ll miss out on all the FUN. and don’t worry, you’ve got me ( your personal bodyguard ) to save you. just because i’m a girl doesn’t mean i can’t kick some ass.”

[exnvhilo]

“i’ve lived half of my life before eleven strikes, now i’m living after eleven. i gotta say, after eleven is much better.”

[vanahq]

“exactly !! i mean, i know this is new york and you’re bound to see STRANGER things every where you turn at any hour of the day, but in comparison to the night life –– it’s like a whole new world. i guess you could even go as far as calling it an UPSIDE-DOWN.”

[seriesdaily]

[vanahq]

what's your favorite physical feature on yourself?

“just take a GOOD look at my face and tell me what you think.”

[vanahq]

how gay are you on a scale of one to "amara is the hottest piece of ass i've ever seen i would die for her"

“i’d say i’m the elton john of WOMEN.... although sometimes ( SOMETIMES ) i dabble in men. ”

[vanahq]

if you knew one of your loved ones/best friends had only one day left to live, how would you spend that last day with them?

“it’s not how i would spend it that matters, but i’d PROBABLY buy them an ice cream or something.”