Vanilla

24

[vanilla-august]

The way Hannibal said: "I let you know me. see me. I gave you a rare gift, but you didn’t want it" runs through my head every day, all day.

(The hunger to be seen, and the terror of being perceived incorrectly)

[vanilla-august]

[vanilla-august]

"Burn the bridges" they say.

But I burned them and still walked back across the flames.

[vanilla-august]

Then I turned 14 and became an atheist. I no longer believe in you, father.

[makingimages]

[vanilla-august]

"Most of the time, I was convinced that I’d lost it. But there were other times, I thought I was mainlining the secret truth of the universe."

[vanilla-august]

[vanilla-august]

Trying to understand, while gasping for my last breath, how the warm and loving hand that once held me could be the same one that slit my throat?

[nixscriptum]

[vanilla-august]

"Blessed be the snake who sheds its skin"

-unknown

[sharpenededges]

[roadkill-pup]

[sharpenededges]

[vanilla-august]

[reverie-quotes]

That month I touched myself every night in my narrow bed and came thinking of you, knowing all the while that I was planting the seeds of a fresh disaster.

— Maggie Nelson, Bluets

[igotlostinslashland]

Wrath of the Lamb (Hannibal, 2013-2015) - L'Ange déchu (Alexandre Cabanel, 1847)

[r4dclouds]