(This a sad dream I had yesterday and I wrote about it,, waa waa,,)
So, today is the 7th day that I've been broken up from Manny. I feel like compared to day one, I am doing better. I had a dream while I took a nap. In the dream, Manny called me and said that he was coming to see me tomorrow and that we would have lots of fun. I was suddenly at the airport and we ran towards each other and hugged each other. He picked me up and spun me around while I giggled and squealed in pure delight. He took my hands and said that he was taking me to the fair, and that before we went, he would take me to the mall. I tried on lots of cute clothes and had so much fun, then, we were at the fair. We played games, went om rides, and took lots of pictures. Finally, for the last ride of the night, he took me on the ferris wheel. When we reached the top, he smiled at me and gave me a candied apple, one of my favorite treats. It was a granny Smith apple with caramel and crushed peanuts. I took a bite and began to chew, and I tasted nothing. No sour or tart taste from the green apple, no sweetness from the caramel, and I couldn't even taste the crushed peanuts that it was rolled in...
This was my brain, giving me a fantasy of a fun day to help me feel better.
Manny looked at me, he looked sad.
"Aw... you figured out it's not real?.."
I began to cry and sobbed, I noticed the candied apple in my hand suddenly became cotton candy and cried harder, the illusion was shattered at this point.
Manny began to comfort me.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you sad. You've been so sad lately that I just wanted to make you smile. I never wanted to make you cry."
He smiled at me, warm and kind.
"Teddy, can I ask you a few questions before you wake up?"
I was still crying, but I nodded, each time I spoke, it was a choked sob, I couldn't stop sniffling.
"Did you have a good day?"
"Yes, it was incredible, amazing, even..."
He smiled at me and beamed, the lights around us making him seem like he was made out of a sunbeam.
"That's all I've ever wanted for you, Teddy. I know you don't want to wake up, but you're going to soon. Even though we're not together, I still want you to be very happy, okay?"
"One day, you'll meet someone who will make you very happy, and you can eat candied apples with them and have fun, okay?"
I nodded, sobbing into his shoulder.
"I love you too, even though it's not romantic, I still care about you lots, okay?"
Then, I buried my face into his chest and woke up sobbing...
