Veeptopus

Vice presidents + octopuses = awesomeness. http://www.jonathan-crow.com https://www.etsy.com/shop/veeptopus

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Happy Cephalopod Awareness Day from Veeptopus

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18. Henry Wilson

President: Ulysses S. Grant, 1873-1875

Party: Republican

State: Massachusetts

Henry Wilson suffered a fatal stroke while in a bathtub in the basement of the Capitol. Yes, there used to be bathtubs in the Capitol.

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17. Schuyler Colfax

President: Ulysses S. Grant 1869-1873

Party: Republican

State: Indiana

Lincoln invited Colfax to join him in his box at the Ford Theater the night he was shot.  Colfax declined. After leaving politics, he made a pretty good career on the lecture circuit talking about his relationship with Lincoln. In spite of this, Lincoln didn’t think much of Colfax, calling him “a little intriguer.”

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16. Andrew Johnson

President: Abraham Lincoln, 1865

Party: Republican

State: Tennessee

Slave Owner?: Yes.

On his inauguration as vice president, Andrew Johnson delivered a cringe-inducing speech while rip-roaring drunk. Afterward, Lincoln ordered the parade marshal of the inauguration to “not permit Johnson to speak a word during the exercises that are now to follow.”

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15. Hannibal Hamlin

President: Abraham Lincoln, 1861-1865

Party: Republican

State: Maine

Slave Owner?: No.

Hannibal Hamlin spent much of his time as veep as far away from the Civil War as he could get, serving for part of the time as a lowly cook for the Maine Coast Guard. He was dropped from the ticket for the 1864 election.

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14. John C. Breckinridge

President: James Buchanan, 1857-1861

Party: Democrat

State: Kentucky

Slave Owner?: Hard to tell.

John C. Breckinridge joined the Confederacy even though his home state Kentucky didn’t secede. Charged with treason by the Union,  Breckinridge fled the country at the end of the war for Cuba – battling alligators, disease and pirates. He was given amnesty by President Johnson in 1868. He is also the only vice president who might have been descended from a raccoon. 

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13. William R. King

President: Franklin Pierce, 1853

Party: Democrat

State: Alabama

Slave Owner?: Yes.

William King was vice president only six weeks before dying of tuberculosis. He was also the only bachelor veep in American history.  King was reportedly inseparable from James Buchanan, who would become American’s only bachelor president. Make of that what you will. 

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12. Millard Fillmore

President: Zachary Taylor, 1849-1850

Party: Whig

State: New York

Slave Owner?: No.

Millard Fillmore became president when Zachary Taylor died after either getting poisoned or after eating too many cherries. Nobody really knows. They exhumed Taylor's body in 1991 but the lab results were inconclusive. When Fillmore died in 1874, his last words were reportedly, “The nourishment is palatable.”

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11. George M. Dallas

President: James K. Polk, 1845-1849

Party: Democrat

State: Pennsylvania

Slave Owner?: No.

Dallas had no idea that he being considered for veepdom. He found out when a band of drunken delegates showed up at his Philadelphia home in the middle of the night. Dallas answered the door in a nightshirt clutching a shotgun.

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9. Richard Mentor Johnson

President: Van Buren, 1837-1841

Party: Democrat

State: Kentucky

Slave Owner: Yes. See below.

Johnson had a common-in-law marriage and two daughters with one of his slaves, Julia Chinn. When Chinn died of cholera, he turned to another one of his slaves, Chinn’s niece, who refused his affection. So he sold her.  Johnson was dubbed by the doorkeeper of the U.S. Senate as “the most vulgar of all vulgar men in this world.”

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8. Martin Van Buren

President: Andrew Jackson, 1833-1837

Party: Democrat

State: Kentucky

Slave Owner: Yes

Born in Kinderhook, N.Y., Van Buren’s nickname was “Old Kinderhook.” That was shortened to “OK” in rallies for his failed 1840 reelection campaign. Somehow, that abbreviation evolved into the ubiquitous idiom. You can literally say that Van Buren was OK. 

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7. John C. Calhoun

Presidents: John Quincy Adams, 1825-1829, Andrew Jackson, 1829-32

Party: Democratic-Republican

State: South Carolina

Slave Owner: Yes. Big time.

Calhoun became embroiled in the Petticoat Affair in 1830 when his spouse, Floride, along with a slew of other Washington socialites organized against War Secretary John Eaton’s new wife. The recently widowed Peggy Eaton had the unladylike temerity to own a bar and a boarding house. Eaton’s main defender was, Calhoun’s boss, Andrew Jackson. Calhoun was dropped from the ticket during Jackson’s second term. The scandal was turned into the 1936 film The Gorgeous Hussy.

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6. Daniel D. Tompkins

President: James Monroe, 1817-1825

Party: Democratic-Republican

State: New York

Slave Owner?: No.

Daniel D. Tompkins was the only vice president to work for free. His entire salary was garnished for outstanding debts to the state of New York. Of course, his personal finance issues along with a raging case of alcoholism meant that Tompkins rarely had the time, or ability, to perform his vice presidential duties.

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5. Elbridge Gerry

President: James Madison, 1813-14

Party: Democratic-Republican

State: Massachusetts

Slave Owner?: No

Gerry signed a bill on election redistricting that was highly favorable to his party. Rival newspapers decried the bill as “gerrymandering.” The name stuck. Like George Clinton, Gerry also died in office, making James Madison the only president to lose two vice presidents. 

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4. George Clinton

Presidents: Thomas Jefferson, 1805-09, James Madison, 1809-1812

Party: Democratic-Republican

State: New York

Slave Owner?: No.

The first Vice President to die in office. Not to be confused with the lead singer of Parliament Funkadelic. This George Clinton never got funked up nor did he go up to the mothership.

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3. Aaron Burr

President: Thomas Jefferson, 1801-1805

Party: Democratic-Republican

State: New York

Slave Owner?: Yes.

One of only two Vice Presidents to shoot a man while in office. In this case, the man, treasure secretary Alexander Hamilton, died. Burr was indicted for murder. And then later, for treason. 

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2. Thomas Jefferson  

President: John Adams, 1797-1801

Party: Democratic-Republican

State: Virginia

Slave Owner?: Yes. The guy who wrote the Constitution owned slaves.

Jefferson died precisely fifty years after signing the Declaration of Independence – July 4, 1826. His political rival John Adams died the same day. July 4 generally seems to be a bad day for veeps. Hannibal Hamlin, a vice president under Lincoln, also died on that day.

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