‘obsessive’

ur sweet psycho. | twenty one 、☆

[viraeth]

how i love you so much.

i’d carve your name a thousand times into my body, i don’t care if it hurts. i would etch the letters of your name across my arms, my torso, my thighs, my legs, hell.. even my feet.

at least if someone undressed me, they’d know that i fully belong to you.

that i’m fully devoted to you.

[viraeth]

i love you so much yet you’re what makes me sad the most. i don’t ever ask you to take the moon out the sky for me.

i just want you to think of me, to consider to me.. to maybe put me above your friends just once.

please, am i asking too much?

[viraeth]

i could write about my love for you, for years to come.

you’re my favorite subject, my muse, my person, my love.

truly.. my love. i’ve never felt this way for anyone before. when you’re not around, it genuinely feels like i’m dying.

so stay awhile, forever.. please?

[viraeth]

we’ve fallen in the same pool of love, yet for months it’s seemed as though i’ve fallen an awful lot deeper.

i am enamored by you. i love everything you do & everything you stand for. so quickly you became my human. you’re my source of happiness, my source of motivation for the greater majority of my days. you’re what i look forward to when i’m sad.. you’re everything i’ve ever wanted.

why does it seem like i love you more? why can i tell anyone about how much i love you for hours on end. why can i write these stupid drabbles about my undying passion for you when you can barely write me a paragraph?

why? is that what i deserve? i know you love me, i know you show it differently.. but i can’t help but to think i’ve done something wrong along the way.

i’m away from home now. i miss you more than ever, i’m going sick with anticipation of seeing you again. is this what they call anxious attachment? i don’t know, i’m not all too informed about the matter.

all i know is that i love you so bad it hurts. your being is so pretty, i could paint you million times & put the portraits up in every art museum this world houses.

please don’t find my obsession with you weird.

please understand that i love you dearly. don’t give up on me.

[viraeth]

i love you so dearly. please love me too. i go everyday just wishing you’d see me the same way i see you. can’t you tell i want you? i can’t take this anymore, notice me.

[viraeth]

i'm a shark

i'm not an orca, or a dolphin. they sing & they converse. they have friends, packs.. at the very least there's more than one of them.

i'm a shark.

i push myself everyday. i hunt by myself. i swim alone, i don't have a choice. i'd die if i didn't. i'm not an orca, they scare me. they hunt me for my liver, & leave the rest of me floating like much of me didn't matter at all.

i'm a shark.

i'm much too feral to keep in a tank, too dangerous to swim with. but please. by all means, remove me from my home just for my fins & my teeth! at least some of me is worth the trouble.

i'm a shark.

for years, i've swam every ocean with no other set of eyes to witness how beautiful it was. with no set of jaws to share a meal with. with no friend to help this void, this ocean.. feel a little less empty.

i'm a shark.. but what if i don't want to swim anymore?

[viraeth]

i hate that i fully consumed you. i hate that i was so caught up in the thought of being with you. i hate that i made you perfect in my mind. i hate that i can’t not think of you, that i can’t stop wondering what you’re doing & if you’re okay.

i shouldn’t care.

you hurt me, i really shouldn’t care.

i feel so stupid. it’s like my capability to think properly all flies out the window when it comes to you.

i want you.

but it seems like you only ever cared for the idea of having me, & what my body had to offer.

[viraeth]

please baby. slap me, punch me, kick me, stab me.. as long as you’re touching me, i don’t care.

it all feels like a kiss when it falls from your hands.

[viraeth]

i wouldn’t have cared if you hurt me everyday of the week or every hour of the day. i would’ve let you if it meant i’d still be able to call you mine.

i want you.

no,

i need you.

in every stretch of anyone’s imagination. i need you. it’s killing me not having you around. i just wanna drown myself in your being.

[viraeth]

go easy on me please, i’m not easy to love.

even though loving you feels like nothing more than breathing.

[viraeth]

i want you like a dog wants to see their owner after only a couple hours of their absence.

i want you like the 52 hz whale wants to be heard.

i want you like a hand wants to be held.

i want you like a swan wants their mate.

i want you like a bruise wants to be kissed.

i want you like a scar wants to disappear.

i want you like the moon wants the sun.

i want you.

[viraeth]

“i’m sorry for everything i’ve done.”

“don’t be. i never looked at you any differently.”

[viraeth]

“i’m so cold when you’re not around.”

“then let me stay by your side..”

[viraeth]

“i didn’t ask you to bring me the moon. i didn’t ask you to touch the sun.. all i asked was for you to be a little nicer to me.”

“i’m sorry.”

“but what’s that good for, anymore?”

[viraeth]

“i wish you saw me the same way i see you..”

“i do see you, though. even on the days that are dark, you’re the only thing that’s shining. i see you. in everything i do, everywhere i go. you’re there.”

[viraeth]

<3

[viraeth]