Kaltenecker

Moo? I'm Kaltenecker, most people don't think I can talk since i'm a cow- but little do they know that I am smarter than I look... ... Read the pinned post for more info

[vld-kaltenecker]

Kaltenecker's Pinned post:

yes, I am a cow

yes, I know how to speak

yes, my owner is voltron

I like to mess around with everyone, usually causing chaos-

I do ship two certain paladins... coug- I mean, moo...

Lance is my best friend, and somehow i'm his wife? I'll let him do his thing-

Feel free to send me asks or message me about voltron!

...

My Friends:

Keith (he doesn’t like me): @keithk-offc

Counselor (crazy dude): @voltron-counselor

Hunk (cooks me food): @hunkg-official

Coran (cool mustache dude): @coran-official

Adam (my #1 OPP): @adam-w-official

Allura+Mice (pretty leader): @allura-mice-offc

Veronica (bullies lance): @veronica-mcclain-official

Pidge (short grmelin): @pidge-holt-offical

Matt (gremlins big bro): @matth-official

Lance (hubby?): @lance-mcclain-offical

Slav (smartass): @vld-slav

Shiro (bossy man): @tshiro-offc

Lotor (purple dude): @lotor-offc

Agent 728 (my #2 OPP): @bom-agent-728

Acxa (lotors servant): @acxa-offc

Curtis (foreshadowing): @curtis-ribeiro-official

Pilots (4 crazy kids): @mfe-pilots-official

...

How to spell my name:

KAL- TEN- NECK- ER

...

My pronouns/sexuality are:

she/it/they (don't worry if you get it wrong)

lesbian (sorry boys)

...

My tags:

#cow asks - (I answer an ask)

#cow thoughts - (my random reblogs/posts)

#the cow speaks - (me messing around)

#ooc post - (actual person behind the blog speaks)

...

My Backstory:

I wasn’t born on a cozy farm—I wandered wild plains, dodging danger and finding my own food. Life was tough, but it made me smart and stubborn.

Then Lance found me in a space mall. He’s loud, dramatic, cool, and somehow thinks a cow can be part of his team, but I'm not complaining.

Basically I met everyone after they had a great mall escape: mainly because of me and my hoverboard, then Lance brought me back to the castle ship and I met the whole team.

Now I stick with Lance and the Paladins, keeping an eye on things, helping when I can, and causing a little chaos. That's pretty much all I remember but some of ya'll can create some bigger backstory for me if you want.

...

So, I guess stick along for the ride- yes I do give rides to people- oh and uh, moo!

ooc under the cut:

my main is @thepurplemurple

-I am a minor

-I will answer ANY asks, don't be embarassed or ashamed (unless its a hate ask)

-I'm just tryna be silly, please don't take anything personally!

-Have fun, cus that's what we're all trying to do! <3

-For legal purposes: IM NOT ACTUALLY KALTENECKER FROM VOLTRON :)

-@myredhairisfake runs the rp, so if you wana join let them know!

[thepurplemurple]

sprained my ankle <3

sorry I haven't been online Im just busy. I still have to do a few nail orders, school, work on strength for soccer so I can get back ASAP, and try and keep up with the socials.

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[hunkg-official]

Uh…who exactly are you talking about?

[vld-kaltenecker]

why would I share this AMAZING secret bruh

like yall are all gonna try and use it

[hunkg-official]

I mean depending on who it is it could be either good or bad!

[vld-kaltenecker]

im thinking both dude

[hunkg-official]

…it’s Lotor, isn’t it?

[bom-agent-728]

Bovine do NOT CONTACT THE GALRA PRINCE

HE CANNOT BE TRUSTED.

[vld-kaltenecker]

its not lotor!!!!!

dont worry dude

again, its someone no one really knows about

poor dude lol

[bom-agent-728]

I yield, who is this mystery person???

[vld-kaltenecker]

still laughing

here i just told hunk lolll

"this is a safe space"

[bom-agent-728]

.....no

not the therapist.

[vld-kaltenecker]

lmafoooooooooooooooooo

seriously tho, he does know everything.

like- everything.

its actually kinda scary

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[hunkg-official]

Uh…who exactly are you talking about?

[vld-kaltenecker]

why would I share this AMAZING secret bruh

like yall are all gonna try and use it

[hunkg-official]

I mean depending on who it is it could be either good or bad!

[vld-kaltenecker]

im thinking both dude

[hunkg-official]

…it’s Lotor, isn’t it?

[bom-agent-728]

Bovine do NOT CONTACT THE GALRA PRINCE

HE CANNOT BE TRUSTED.

[vld-kaltenecker]

its not lotor!!!!!

dont worry dude

again, its someone no one really knows about

poor dude lol

[bom-agent-728]

I yield, who is this mystery person???

[vld-kaltenecker]

still laughing

here i just told hunk lolll

"this is a safe space"

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[hunkg-official]

Uh…who exactly are you talking about?

[vld-kaltenecker]

why would I share this AMAZING secret bruh

like yall are all gonna try and use it

[hunkg-official]

I mean depending on who it is it could be either good or bad!

[vld-kaltenecker]

im thinking both dude

[hunkg-official]

…it’s Lotor, isn’t it?

[vld-kaltenecker]

hell to the no

he doesn't do anything but for himself

no one knows anything about him actually....

hm, poor guy

[hunkg-official]

Who is it??

[vld-kaltenecker]

lmao im laughing my ass off

"this is a safe space"

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[hunkg-official]

Uh…who exactly are you talking about?

[vld-kaltenecker]

why would I share this AMAZING secret bruh

like yall are all gonna try and use it

[hunkg-official]

I mean depending on who it is it could be either good or bad!

[vld-kaltenecker]

im thinking both dude

[hunkg-official]

…it’s Lotor, isn’t it?

[bom-agent-728]

Bovine do NOT CONTACT THE GALRA PRINCE

HE CANNOT BE TRUSTED.

[vld-kaltenecker]

its not lotor!!!!!

dont worry dude

again, its someone no one really knows about

poor dude lol

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[hunkg-official]

Uh…who exactly are you talking about?

[vld-kaltenecker]

why would I share this AMAZING secret bruh

like yall are all gonna try and use it

[hunkg-official]

I mean depending on who it is it could be either good or bad!

[vld-kaltenecker]

im thinking both dude

[hunkg-official]

…it’s Lotor, isn’t it?

[vld-kaltenecker]

hell to the no

he doesn't do anything but for himself

no one knows anything about him actually....

hm, poor guy

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[hunkg-official]

Uh…who exactly are you talking about?

[vld-kaltenecker]

why would I share this AMAZING secret bruh

like yall are all gonna try and use it

[hunkg-official]

I mean depending on who it is it could be either good or bad!

[vld-kaltenecker]

im thinking both dude

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[hunkg-official]

Uh…who exactly are you talking about?

[bom-agent-728]

Bovine, are you talking about the analyst @vld-slav ?

He has been able to provide some... interesting numbers, I suppose.

[vld-kaltenecker]

no no no, that dude it smart but doesn't do shit (no offense)

someone who is honestly underestimated

heheheheh

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[hunkg-official]

Uh…who exactly are you talking about?

[vld-kaltenecker]

why would I share this AMAZING secret bruh

like yall are all gonna try and use it

[vld-kaltenecker]

I think I just figured out who to ask about ANYTHING-

like you can get ANY info you need from him, just get on his good side.

DAMN this is gonna be put to good use >:)

[veronica-mcclain-official]

damn veronica you got rizz

-@vld-kaltenecker

I... Don't really want to talk or think about that situation right now.. But thank you, for what I'm assuming is a compliment.

[vld-kaltenecker]

yes its a compliment

let me know when you want to talk about the baddies wanting you right nowwww because I need ALL the tea

[lance-mcclain-offical]

I’m so confused, who the fuck has a crush on my sister??? Who is it???? No one will fucking tell me

[acxa-offc]

Who wants to hurt her??? I'll kill em

I-i mean she's capable herself ofc bc she's awesome I uh

[lance-mcclain-offical]

It’s Allura— and what do you mean hurt her? Allura would never hurt anyone, she just has a crush

[acxa-offc]

Allura - I thought they got along...

Your her sister surely you too concerned that she "has a crush". I at least want to prevent Veronica to get injured.

[lance-mcclain-offical]

Why would she get injured??

Wait— did you think I meant “crush” as in… like physically crushing someone????

Lol— it’s not literal, it just means youre like, kinda obsessed with someone, usually romantically. It’s nothing bad

[acxa-offc]

I'm sorry for my mistake and judge of Allura's character.

It's reliving to see another acknowledge Veronica's quick wit, intelligence, strength, and individual resilience yet kind hearted charisma. I hope all goes well for them and Allura has the confidence to "shoot her shot". Veronica is someone who should have people close to her. She deserves it.

[allura-mice-offc]

ANOTHER-

wait, @lance-mcclain-offical she is the other person in your 'love triangle' ????

oh my- this is going to be hard

[lance-mcclain-offical]

…yes

Sorry I should’ve said I told her about you, but uhh… now you both know! So you can like… fight to the death or smth, idk ive never been in a love triangle

[allura-mice-offc]

FIGHT TO THE DEATH?????

im okay- thank you...

I think it's up to @veronica-mcclain-official at this point-

[veronica-mcclain-official]

I- Excuse me? What... Why would they fight to the death for me?? No?? Lance, what?? I'm sorry, but I need a minute...

[vld-kaltenecker]

Y’all fucked up BAD

wheres the popcorn @pidge-holt-offical

[vld-kaltenecker]

reminder that I made this masterpiece

@coran-official @hunkg-official @keithk-offc @pidge-holt-offical @tshiro-offc @lance-mcclain-offical @adam-w-official @vld-kaltenecker @lotor-offc @matth-official @allura-mice-offc @acxa-offc @veronica-mcclain-official @bom-agent-728 @voltron-counselor

[bom-agent-728]

Can’t believe I have ‘beef’ with the cow

Haha!

[lance-mcclain-offical]

DONT TALK ABOUT MY WIFE LIKE THAT!!!

[blue-samurai88]

...i mean, it was quite funny you have to admit

I thought you would like this kindof humor, word-jokes are one of your things!

[lance-mcclain-offical]

Well not when there’s an implication of EATING MY WIFE????

[bom-agent-728]

I am physiologically incapable of consuming meat

[lance-mcclain-offical]

You’d still have to kill her to make meat, doesn’t matter if you eat it or not

[bom-agent-728]

Okay now he’s just looking for a reason to be mad at me

[lance-mcclain-offical]

Youre literally talking about KILLING MY WIFE HOW COULD I NOT BE?????

[vld-kaltenecker]

WHY ARE WE KILLING ME

[lance-mcclain-offical]

THATS WHAT I WAS SAYING

[vld-kaltenecker]

nah im done with this shit, @bom-agent-728 is worse that @adam-w-official

[lance-mcclain-offical]

Couldn’t agree more my wife is never wrong

[vld-kaltenecker]

*fist bump*

[bom-agent-728]

Can’t believe I have ‘beef’ with the cow

Haha!

[lance-mcclain-offical]

DONT TALK ABOUT MY WIFE LIKE THAT!!!

[blue-samurai88]

...i mean, it was quite funny you have to admit

I thought you would like this kindof humor, word-jokes are one of your things!

[lance-mcclain-offical]

Well not when there’s an implication of EATING MY WIFE????

[bom-agent-728]

I am physiologically incapable of consuming meat

[lance-mcclain-offical]

You’d still have to kill her to make meat, doesn’t matter if you eat it or not

[bom-agent-728]

Okay now he’s just looking for a reason to be mad at me

[lance-mcclain-offical]

Youre literally talking about KILLING MY WIFE HOW COULD I NOT BE?????

[vld-kaltenecker]

WHY ARE WE KILLING ME

[lance-mcclain-offical]

THATS WHAT I WAS SAYING

[vld-kaltenecker]

nah im done with this shit, @bom-agent-728 is worse that @adam-w-official

[lance-mcclain-offical]

what is with all hate against you lately bruh, I dont see anything wrong

-@vld-kaltenecker

Finally, someone thinks I’m right, and yeah, I don’t see it either tbh

[vld-kaltenecker]

idk people have sticks up their asses or sm