Summary:Ā She will only ever be seen as a child in Tommyās eyes. Thatās what she gets for being Finnās friend. No matter, her feelings for the man refuse to fade. Finn tried to help her, tried to get something out of his brother, but the man was unbreakable. Y/n decides that maybe itās time to move and the best way to do that is to avoid him. If she canāt see him then he canāt bother her, right? Wrong. You canāt avoid Thomas Shelby.
Request:Ā Helloo can i request an imagine where the reader is way younger than tommy(maybe around finnās age or between him or john)works for him and has a major crush on him but sheās vv insecure bc of her age, grace has already died, and because itās very hard to figure out if tommy likes her or not, so she gets sad bc she really wants to be with him and have children other than his own
Warnings: Lanuage, age gap
A/N: Iām pretty happy with how this turned out. Sure, it didnāt turn out exactly how I wanted it to, but itās pretty good either way. Oneshot requests are still closed and I wish you guys would respect that. Itās not all of you, just some. I want to have all my oneshot requests done before I open requests back up and I canāt do that if people keep sending them in.
That was a common fact that everyone knew. Y/n didnāt believe herself to be any the wiser for knowing that one simple thing. It just made life easier to deal with. When the market was out of apples or her seamstress ruined her favorite dress, she simply remembered that life is hard. That meant that not everything was supposed to go her way. She didnāt fret over anything, knowing it wasnāt worth it. Life was hard and if it was meant to happen then it would happen.
However, she was young and naive, and those words didnāt always mean as much as they should have.Ā
Her life became extremely hard when she started working for Thomas Shelby. Y/n had been a friend of his youngest brotherās, Finn, since they were children. The two would often be found creating havoc throughout the streets of Small Heath along with the other children theyād befriended. Y/n never spent much time at the Shebly household, though. Her mother always wanted her home in time for supper with enough time to get chores done before the table was set.Ā
Finn and Y/n were close, not as close as Finn and Isiah were, but they were close nonetheless. And Finn cared enough to get her a job at his familyās company when she was old enough. It was a sweet offer that she couldnāt pass up. Her parents didnāt bring in much money and what was brought in her father usually spent on beer. So with shaking hands, she entered Thomas Shelbyās office and accepted the job.Ā
She wasnāt given an easy job, being one of Tommyās secretaries, but not for the reason she would have thought.
āDonāt tell me itās still bothering you,ā Finn rolled his eyes, pouring himself a glass of whiskey. The two sat across from each other in his familyās private room at the Garrison. It was one of Y/nās days off and it had been a slow day for Finn so he decided the two needed a drink. Being early in the day, just around noon, the pub was empty except for them.
Y/n leaned back in her chair, a sigh escaping her lips. āYeah, I mean I see him every day. What am I supposed to do, forget about him?ā
Her friend nodded and handed her a drink.
She scoffed, taking the drink. Looking down at the amber liquid, she said, āYou just donāt get it, Finn. I know I donāt stand a chance. Fuck, every woman in fucking Small Heath has fallen for your brother. Iām not special and I know that, but that doesnāt change how I feel.ā
āGod, you really like him, donāt you?ā he shook his head, a smile on his lips.
Y/n nodded, taking a sip of her drink. She hated how she felt. She had always been an emotional person. Not everything made her cry, but it wasnāt hard to have tears prick her eyes. She hated being confronted or yelled at because the tears always showed up and didnāt know when to take their leave. And that didnāt change when she started to feel something towards her employer. Those feelings were always present and could never leave her alone. Y/n tried her best to keep it from interfering with her work, but it was hard when the man was always around her.
Y/n hated that she loved, not liked, Thomas Shelby.
āYeah, I do,ā she mumbled more to herself than Finn.
At first, she hadnāt even realized she was falling for the man. But over time, Finn started to notice something was off. He had known her long enough to know when something was wrong and something was definitely wrong. Y/n would have thought that he would be upset with her for liking his brother, but he simply laughed. Honestly, if she was in his position, she would have to. Since then, Finn went out of his way to tease her about it.
āI could probably talk to him for you,ā Finn offered, giving her a small encouraging smile.
Y/n shook her head. āI donāt need you to do that, Finn. Itās my problem, not yours.ā There was a short pause while she sipped at her whiskey. āI can barely talk to him on my own, it wouldnāt be worth having you do anything.ā
He laughed, āDid you ever think that itās him and not you? Tommy is shit at communicating with people, doesnāt matter who it is. And have you seen the way he looks at you?ā
āHe has only ever seen me as a child,ā she scoffed. āAnd he lets me know every day.ā
āYou know heās not good with feelings, right?ā
Y/n rolled her eyes. Sometimes she wished she was as distant when it came to emotions as the man she loved. It would probably make life miserable, but not as miserable as she was at the moment. āWhat about Grace, uh? He still loves her. And what about Charlie? Tommy seems to be content with what he has.ā
Finn leaned forward, looking his friend dead in the eye. āGrace was everything he was looking for in a woman, but that doesnāt make it love. She betrayed him and didnāt do much for Tommy but give him a son. Thatās it. Heās moved on.ā He shifted in his seat. āTommy deserves someone real and Charlie deserves a mother. I hate to say this, but I hope itād be you. You care a lot about Tommy and his wellbeing and if he canāt see that then fuck him.ā
Maybe that was true, maybe it wasnāt. Y/n had no clue, but she hoped that there was truth to what Finn had said. She hoped that something would happen. It was stupid, she felt like a school girl all over again, waiting for her crush to make a move. She just hoped that there was some truth to those words, maybe then she stood a chance.
A few days later, Finn had found himself over at Tommyās house, helping him look over plans for a new stable. John and Arthur were supposed to be there, but they both had family matters to deal with. It didnāt matter, though, as the work was small and gave more time for drinking.Ā
Sitting in one of the houseās many sitting rooms, Finn leaned back in his chair while he watched his brother fetch a bottle of whiskey. The conversation heād had with Y/n days earlier was still at the front of his mind. He felt bad for her, for the position she was stuck in. Finn knew all too well how hard it was to fall for someone and he remembered Y/n telling him almost the same thing he had told her the other day. He wanted to do something for her, help her out any way he could, but what was he to do? There was little that could be done when it came to his cold, distant brother. Few could get through to him and even fewer could read what he was thinking. But Finn was certain of one thing, the way Tommy looked at Y/n. It was more loving than how he had once looked at Grace. It wasnāt lust, it was love. It was more than just one emotion. It was happiness, love, lust. Anything that sparked joy, that is what his eyes showed when he looked at Y/n. Finn knew his brother felt something for his friend and he was going to get him to admit it.
Tommy reappeared with a full bottle of whiskey and poured himself and his brother a glass. He handed one to Finn before taking a seat across from him. āAre you ready to go to the races?ā
Finn looked over at him and shrugged. It wasnāt like he hadnāt been before. āI suppose.ā
āThere shouldnāt be any problems this time,ā his brother commented.
Mentioning the races gave the youngest Shelby an idea. āCould Y/n come then?ā
Tommy raised a brow, sipping at his drink. āWhy?ā his voice was flat, not exposing anything.Ā
āWhy not? Sheās never been and if itās supposed to be calm then I donāt see why not,ā he explained.
Finn frowned and rolled his eyes. āCome on Tommy, why?ā
The older brother sighed in frustration. āBecause sheās never been and she would just be a distraction for you. Y/nās practically a child as it is, sheād just get in the way.ā
āShe the same age as I am! Why can I go but she canāt?ā
āBecause this is family business and youāre family!ā Tommy almost shouted at him. āY/n probably wouldnāt want to be around a bunch of Peaky Blinders as it is.ā
A laugh escaped the younger brotherās lips causing Tommy to frown and set his glass down. āAre you blind or something?ā Finn asked, laughing. āAre you? Do you not see that she likes you? Itās very fucking obvious! The fucking king would even notice! Not to mention, you seem to feel the same way. So, why donāt you invite her and make a date out of it?ā
Tommy rolled his eyes and decided to stare out the window. He was silent for a long while, Finn sitting restless opposite of him. āSheāll get over it. They always do.ā
Finn sighed in defeat. He wasnāt quite sure what he was trying to accomplish but it wasnāt going to happen. Nothing was going to happen. Thomas Shelby was a brick wall, that was how Finn could best describe him. A brick wall that nothing could penetrate. You could throw things over it, but more often than not, everyone fell short.Ā
Now, what was he going to tell Y/n? He tried, he really did, but there was no breaking Thomas Shelby. He was a selfish bastard that only cared about his own wellbeing. Sure, heād tell people everything he did was for them, but it was nothing but a lie. He only ever cared about himself.
It had been a few weeks since Finn and Y/n had talked in the Garrison and things with Tommy hadnāt improved at all. In fact, they had somehow gotten worse. She wasnāt sure what had happened, but the man was more distant than normal. But only towards her. He never called her into his office to go over paperwork like he used to, instead asking for Lizzie. And he did his best to keep her out of things. Everything she used to be a part of, she was shut out of.
Y/n tired to think nothing of it at first. Tommy was a strange man and his mood changed with the wind. It wasnāt worth it to read into anything. But then there came a point when she had enough and wanted nothing more than to confront Tommy. She told Finn about it but he simply told her to leave it alone, that it wasnāt worth bringing up to his brother, so she didnāt.Ā
Instead, with all the newfound time on her hands, she was given time to rethink her life. She no longer wanted to be hung up on a man who would never love her back. Why waste her time when there were plenty of men who wanted her? Y/n laughed thinking about all the times she had refused menās advances because she thought that Tommy would come around. Foolish. Fucking stupid. She was wasting her life and she just couldnāt do that any longer.
So, she wasnāt going to.
Y/n then started to go on dates, they were boring, but it was better than sitting at home, feeling sorry for herself. Some of them worked in the factories, covering dust, and others were businessmen that wanted nothing to do with Small Heath. It was too poor for them, too dirty, too this, too that. It always made her wonder why they wanted anything to do with her as she was a great example of what came from Small Heath. No matter how many dates she went on, though, she found nothing she liked. But she just had to wait it out, the right one would come.
She was only 19, she had time to find someone and settle down. But there was only one man she wanted to do that with.
In the back of her mind, she still had feelings for Tommy, but if she never spoke of them, then she believed they werenāt real. He no longer caused her problems and was only apart of her work life. And as Tommy started to distance himself from her in the office, she decided to do the same. It would help her move on because being hung up on that man would be the death of her if she didnāt.
Putting her finished paperwork in a file, Y/n placed it in a bin on her desk for Tommy to look at later. She stood from her chair, placing a few files on Lizzieās desk for her to go over the next day and started to clean her own. The door to Tommyās office opened, but she didnāt hear it close, telling her he was lurking in the doorway, something he was known to do.Ā
āYouāve been avoiding me,ā he stated.
Y/n shrugged, not bothering to look up at him. āOnly because you have.ā
He was silent for a second, searching his pockets for his pack of cigarettes. Once found, he dragged it between his lips before placing it between them and liting a match. āItās nothing personal, Y/n. Just business.ā
She scoffed, searching for her bracelet that had fallen off earlier in the day. She thought it landed in one of her drawers, but they were both empty. āOh, yeah, I figured,ā she spat. āEverythings always about business to you.ā
Try as he might, Tommy couldnāt fool her. Y/n knew what it was like to not be welcome. To be pushed away. Most of her life, her father wanted nothing to do with her and he often did what Tommy was doing now. Without saying anything, he would just leave her out of things and when she was in the room, he would keep her out of the conversation. The girl was used to it at home, but she didnāt like the treatment at work. And not from someone she cared about.
āIām glad you understand.ā
Y/n rolled her eyes and finally looked up at him. āYouāre glad I understand? Understand what? That youāre a fucking arsehole? Yeah, Iām glad I understand that.ā
āY/n I-ā he was cut off before he could say anything more.
āIāve been avoiding you because youāve been avoiding me. And I know Finn talked to you, Iām not stupid and that boy is shit at keeping secrets! So, how about you just tell me how you feel instead of keeping me from my work? Iād rather know the truth than be treated like shit!ā
Tommy didnāt say anything, he just stood there, blank face and all. It was hard to read him, but Y/n didnāt even bother, if he couldnāt give her an answer then she wanted nothing to do with him.Ā
āForget it,ā she mumbled and grabbed her coat off the hook. Shrugging it on, she headed for the door, leaving Tommy standing in the doorway of his office.Ā
The man let out a sigh once he saw her slip out the office door. Pushing himself off the door, he went after her. He didnāt know what he was going to say as he wasnāt good at expressing his emotions, but he couldnāt let her leave like that. Heād seen what pushing her away had done, Y/n was miserable yet she pretended to be cheerful and happy. It broke his heart that he had caused that and Finn made sure he knew it.Ā
āY/n wait,ā he jogged after her once on the street.
She sighed, turning around as he came to a stop. āWhat now? You want to tell me itās childish to be upset over this? That itās just fucking life? What Tommy?ā
He shook his head. āNo, no. None of that. I justā¦ā He let out a sigh. This was one conversation he should have thought through first. āI like you I do. Fuck, I might even love you, but I canāt risk it. Not with what happened to Grace, not with whatās happened to everyone around me. I canāt do that to you.ā
āYou canāt do that, but you forget itās not just your choice. Everyone in your life has chosen to be there no matter what happens,ā she told him, crossing her arms over her chest. āIām Finnās friend, I work for you, so no matter what Iām at risk. So donāt give me that bullshit.ā
āI donāt want to lose you, Y/n,ā he sighed, a look of defeat in his eyes. āI would rather see you sitting at your desk, alive, then dying in my arms somewhere down the road.ā
Y/n laughed, giving him a small smile. Tommy raised a brow at the action, unsure what caused such a reaction. āLife happens, Tommy. We canāt predict it and we can rarely change it. Itās not worth fretting over especially when youāre not in control. But I know how I feel,ā she told him. āI love you and Iāve tried not to, but it doesnāt work like that. I love you, Tommy, and I could see a life with you, but if you canāt see that then fine. Just tell me and you never have to hear about it again.ā
Tommy took a drag of his cigarette, processing her words. He looked around, distracting himself with the people on the street. Was he ready to risk it? Was he ready to willingly put his heart on his sleeve for a woman again? He wanted a life with Y/n, she was smart, beautiful, and caring. Tommy could honestly see himself with her and maybe down the road, they would have a few kids. āCome one.āĀ
He tugged on her arm and started walking away. Y/n quickly fell in step beside him. Looking over at him, she asked, āWhere are we going?ā
āTo dinner and I promise Iāll stop pushing you away if you do the same.ā
A smile lite up Y/nās face. She honestly didnāt think sheād get through to him, but the man was full of surprises. She knew that it would take Tommy time to adjust to being in a relationship, she understood that, but she was willing to wait.
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