just another white elm growing at the end of town

⊹ ࣪ ˖ pfp: enderp96734 ⊱ ambrose/graham, he/they/it ⊰ ⋆˚ part of an osdd system. pretty frequent fronter. will likely be more of a personal/vent blog (prosecutor and npd holder #lol)

[freakoutgirl]

"all you ever do is complain" that's not true. I also resent.

[freakoutgirl]

and love..........

[voluntaryviictim]

im not even fucking doing anything wrong you guys just dont see us as people. there's no reason for you guys to not like us you just dont care

[voluntaryviictim]

How to ask for reassurance without just being deeply fucking annoying

[voluntaryviictim]

even if i did it now nobody would care because im not an obedient kid anymore. the price of autonomy is loneliness

[voluntaryviictim]

Genuinely was just never meant to make it this far

[voluntaryviictim]

I was supposed to be just another unsolved case. they were supposed to just rule it a suicide because they didnt have any more reason to investigate. people were supposed to come to my funeral

[voluntaryviictim]

Genuinely was just never meant to make it this far

[voluntaryviictim]

highk prob killing myself before I graduate

[voluntaryviictim]

IM GONNA KILL MYSELFFFFF

[voluntaryviictim]

I hate band so so fucking much oh my god irene im going to find you

[voluntaryviictim]

im not even joking im not even joking I hate all of you except our psrtners so much

[voluntaryviictim]

I hope ALLLL of you die

[voluntaryviictim]

I DONT HAVE ANY FUCKING. DRUMLINE SPIRIT YOU DONT TREAT US LIKE PEOPLE

[voluntaryviictim]

only good for being idealized and used #girlwhatever

[voluntaryviictim]

like if a byoukidere actually just hated you

[voluntaryviictim]

im going to say things we will blatantly regret later and that only feel that way because im taking them in bad faith if i let myself actually speak. but im never allowed to actually speak

[voluntaryviictim]

obviously im exaggerating so none of this matters. but I want to be more than just the bad part of a person. we aren't very separate but even then I want to be seen like a person even when im 'being like that'. is that so bad to want. I want people to see me as literally anything more than just what they want from me. and lord forbid I express this because I have to mask it behind 10 layers of I Know I'm Dramatic and Too Sensitive when am I allowed to actually feel

[voluntaryviictim]

god jm just tired. everybody has an idealized view of me/us and no matter what we are only going to be that view. fuckinggg whatever man

[voluntaryviictim]

obviously im exaggerating so none of this matters. but I want to be more than just the bad part of a person. we aren't very separate but even then I want to be seen like a person even when im 'being like that'. is that so bad to want. I want people to see me as literally anything more than just what they want from me. and lord forbid I express this because I have to mask it behind 10 layers of I Know I'm Dramatic and Too Sensitive when am I allowed to actually feel