True Love Truly Does Wait
This past September, I turned 22. As I look at those around me that are in my age range, I realize that I don't have the same relationship experience as the average 22 year old. People my age typically have either experienced numerous relationships, a different sort of physical relationship than I have, are engaged, have children, or are married. I feel like every time I log on to Facebook, someone else has posted a picture of their engagement ring. While I am happy for these couples and pray for a great future for all of them, it gets a little discouraging from time to time. I have been dating the love of my life for a year and a half now, which isn't long, but seems to be the time that other people my age either get engaged or have already gotten engaged. So why am I not that lucky? Because I'm not other people. It has been difficult for me to truly let that sink in, but thinking about that truly makes me grateful for what I have in this relationship and where I am in it. Let me share a quick love story with you before I continue this rant.
 Throughout my entire primary-high school career, I was a single girl. Sure, I had some major crushes on boys older and younger than me. The wrong guy would say the right thing, and I would fall for him instantly, which eventually landed me saying 'yes' to a boy who asked me out in high school, though the 'relationship' only lasted a couple of hours. I always felt like the girl no one wanted to date because she was too loud, too ugly, or had too many pretty friends that all the guys liked instead. Junior and Senior prom were spent with some of my closest girlfriends, because finding an actual date was nearly impossible for me. I got a little discouraged throughout school while I was watching those around me enjoying being together, but seeing so many broken hearts come of those relationships helped me to realize that I was okay where I was. Freshman year of college rolled around, and I made a pact to myself that I would find me a boyfriend. I would automatically crush on a guy if he was cute and a Christian. Those were basically the two requirements I had, and if he wasn't a Christian, I was going to make him one. I ended up pushing people away and feeling more lonely than I had felt before. I eventually met a boy a year or two later who made all of that go away. We met at work, and the first impression I had of him was that he was a boy who loved to read about Jesus before his shift. I was interested in him the moment I saw this, and our common interests in music just emphasized my attraction. My aforementioned requirements began to multiply, adding a good taste of music, great friends, and a fun personality to the list. We enjoyed being together, and being asked out in a Walmart parking lot may not seem romantic to some, but when you're in the moment, you'd be amazed at what can get you blushing. He was there when my grandfather was in his car wreck, helped encourage me/support me through my second trip to Haiti, and never let me pay for a thing when we were together. This boy and I only spent two months together, and while he may think that those two months are something I regret, I can honestly say that I am grateful for them. I learned a lot from that short relationship. The saying 'opposites attract' has a lot of truth in it, and this particular boy and I were too much alike for us to work. This relationship showed me what could and could not work for a couple to truly be committed to each other. I think about this relationship often, not because I'm sad it ended, but because I'm grateful for the lessons learned through it all, and I pray that this particular guy will find a woman that fits him perfectly, because he deserves something great. Once this relationship ended, I once again began searching for that special someone, leaning toward a boy I had crushed on since our first encounter. This guy was the whole package. He was funny, had a love for Jesus like no one I had ever met before, and loved children. While I swore up and down that he and I would be perfect for each other, we never dated. I was devastated about that before, but I'm so incredibly thankful that it never happened, because this guy is one of my best friends in the entire world. Whenever I realized that God had separate plans for the two of us, I sat down and had a literal 'Come to Jesus meeting', in which I told God that I was done being the girl I had been, searching for a man to supply my needs and to comfort me. I told God that He was the One that could truly satisfy me, and I was going to believe that every day. On April 3rd of 2013, had this tattooed on my ring finger on my left hand:Â
 This was my daily reminder that my Heavenly Father is the One I need to be searching for, because He is the true source of unconditional love, or agape, as I like to refer to it. Because He is the true source of love, He is the One who gets to choose my future spouse, not me. This tattoo reminded me that while I could spend all the time in the world searching for true love, Jesus has already given it to me, and He will provide a man when He knows I'm ready. For a month and a half following that, I remained faithful to my promise to God that I would seek Him rather than searching for 'the one'. I was constantly told about our grocery manager on night crew, and how he was a good Christian guy and that I needed to date him. Though these comments were made for months prior to the tattoo and weeks after, I kept denying that we should date and kept seeking God. This boy got promoted to co-manager a few weeks later, and I'll admit, I definitely thought he was cute, but I had made a promise to God, and I tried to stick to it. On May 18th, I received a call from my mom telling me that I needed to gather up my cousins and my sister and get to the trauma hospital ASAP, because my grandfather, my best friend, was about to take his last breaths. Because my store manager was on vacation and I was scheduled to be at work that day, I sent my co-manager a text explaining to him why I would be unable to make it to work that day and probably that week. May 18th was the longest day of my life, sitting in a small room with my family trying to keep my mind off of the fact that the man I loved most in the world was about to leave earth. While I was waiting for some boy from my past to let me know he was praying for me and that everything was going to be okay, I was surprised with multiple texts throughout the day filled with encouragement, scripture, and worship lyrics from the guy I had just met but couldn't fall for because he was my manager. I received text after text reminding me that God is still faithful and that my grandfather was going to be in a place where he was no longer suffering. I was able to feel a peace during my grandfather's passing that could only be provided by Jesus. I spoke to this guy constantly throughout that week, telling him how I felt like it was all a bad dream that I wanted to wake up from and I couldn't believe that I had just spent my last week with my best friend. While any other person would have been annoyed by the amount of texts I sent out on an hourly basis, this particular guy was understanding and patient with me, encouraging me through it all. Once all of this passed and I began work again, I remember asking him out to eat Taco Bell with me (because what can I say, I like the expensive stuff), and he rejected me. My heart sunk. A few days later, however, I was invited to go swimming with this boy and some friends, and it was one of the most fun days of my life. From that day forward, this boy and I were inseparable. As I mentioned before, my first relationship, as short as it was, taught me some important things about relationships. A couple that is too much alike or has everything planned out isn't always destined to work out. The man I'm with now, we are definitely opposite. While we both have some crazy family backgrounds and we both have a love for Jesus, our personalities and interests are completely different, but I think that's what makes us so good for each other. We enjoy spending time with each other, but we know that there will be times for us to enjoy our interests alone as well. This boy never really asked me out... we just kind of happened. Our swim trip happened on May 31st, and we to this day claim that to be our anniversary date. A year and a half later, we fall for each other more every day. We don't always agree on everything and can get frustrated with each other from time to time (the poor guy is putting up with an emotional drama queen for goodness sake), but we are committed to each other and love each other, and I couldn't ask for anything better.Â
I waited so long to be in the relationship I am in now. I went through heartbreak, broke some hearts myself, and even compromised my beliefs just for a moment of happiness and butterflies in my stomach. I wouldn't change a single bit of it, though. I wouldn't change where I am now for anything. So what if everyone around me is married or engaged? Who cares that couples my age seem to have their lives all figured out so soon? I have a man who loves Jesus more than he loves me, and lets that love of Jesus overflow into me. I joke (and maybe even hint, if I'm being completely honest here) about engagement rings and being married on a frequent basis. Marriage isn't something I would want to rush into yet, though. My relationship with this man is something that is being nourished each day, and when the LORD wants to bless us with the same last name, He will. Until that moment, I will wait. We will wait. Side by side, we will walk the path that God placed in front of us, rather than running into doors that He has yet to open. Our relationship will be centered around the will of God rather than our own personal desires. If our hearts are in the right place, God will grant us those desires, in His timing.Â
Far too often I see a young girl (or even an older woman) feel as if she needs to let her guard down and compromise her standards for the first guy that shows interest in her. I see young women getting hurt over and over again because they keep going back to the same guy or same type of guy that isn't good for her, because she is too busy wanting to fulfill her own needs that she forgets that there's a God called Jehovah Jireh, the LORD our Provider, waiting with open arms to carry her. Please don't let that be you, and if it is, stop it in it's tracks now. We all deserve happiness. We all deserve unconditional love. We all deserve to find that one special person who will do this crazy thing called life with us. But to find that person, we are going to have to keep our standards set, guard our hearts, and let God do the work for us. He truly does have a plan for you, you just have to be willing to wait and be patient.Â
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. -Â 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. - 2 Timothy 2:22
I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases. - Song of Solomon 8:4
Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life. - Proverbs 4:23
He won't leave you lonely.
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