YOU are enough.
YOU are beautiful.
YOU are meant to be here.

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@walkwithwonder
YOU are enough.
YOU are beautiful.
YOU are meant to be here.
My bright spot in tackling social distancing is slowing down. I have scheduled every minute of my life for years. This has caused me to find more avenues to connect with loved ones, express gratitude, and find beauty in all moments.
I don't know if I told you guys how much I love Bookmans. But it is honestly one of the best stores to not only get books but to get the most random, fun things. There are only a couple in the Valley. I recommend you check them out. I got all of these books for under $50 which would cost double at a standard bookstore or online. I disinfected them and are good as new.
Murphy, Peace Out
Asphalt firm beneath my feet. Horns buzzing. Lights flashing.
It was one of those Murphy’s Law Moments. What can go wrong will go wrong. I could have taken it two different
ways. I could have allowed the events that transpired to put me in a bad mood, or I could see the light and choose joy.
I will say the heat was working its way up through me, but I took a deep breath, sighed, and dealt with the chaos that was unfolding.
I left my keys in my husband’s car and had no backups. I was supposed to be at work in 30 minutes, and I still had to drop off my wild toddler at day care. I had no car seat. My Uber app was not working. I couldn’t really think straight with my dogs barking incessantly.
I took a moment to consider the silver lining. I live about a mile and a half from work. I grabbed my daughter, trotted down the stairs, and decided I would run to work.
I am wearing jewelry, a dress, and heels, but I was determined. I grabbed my husband’s golf club to reach the garage door closer without triggering the motion sensors. I had my coffee in the cup holder, and I started jogging through our complex.
The stares were endless. I had elderly walkers dive out of our way. I am sure I looked pretty crazy doing a half jog/walk with my daughter having a huge smile and flapping cheeks in the wind.
After 20 minutes, we arrived to her day care, and I felt a sense of accomplishment because I could have called out or given up. Instead, we got creative and told Murphy peace out; we will make our own outcomes. I even thought that I was doing something nice for the environment. I may start walking to work more often.
I got a few more interesting looks when I strolled up to work and rode up the elevator with an empty stroller. It was great conversation starter.
There are times where life gets hectic, but we do get to choose our reaction to it and hopefully it will make a positive outcome.
Under the Rug
I was cleaning my house today. Something I rarely do (You can ask my husband). I guess on my list of priorities it falls on the bottom of the list. I work full-time, and I am wrapping up my MBA this spring. I have a husband, seven-month-old daughter, and two dogs at home. Plus, I have an array of other activities I like to do like community service, traveling, yoga, walking, and so forth.
This means that I often justify forgoing washing the stack of dished piled a mile-high in my sink or brushing off the fact that I haven’t mopped in swept the floors in months. This habit I have, though, means that instead of dealing with my messes I conform literally to the phrase of “brushing everything under the rug.”
As I was sweeping the dirt from the unnoticeable crevices in the baseboards, I started thinking figuratively how often I brush items under the rug in my life. How I compartmentalize what I am willing, wanting, and not going to deal with. Then, I find out later that the things I have decided to not deal with are building up as a huge pile of dirt to the side that then seems unmanageable to deal with.
Instead of allowing the dirt to pile up, I must spend the time time to clean it as it hits the floor. I need to reflect on what is happening and find ways to resolve the issues rather than pretending they do not exist. I can do this in three steps:
1. Pause - When something happens that makes me upset, I need to take a second to stop and breathe. This will calm me down to think clearly.
2. Ask - Why am I upset? Why do I have the desire to sweep this under the rug? What will I accomplish if I do ignore it, and then later on, how will that make me feel?
3. Task- Once I discover how I am feeling and what I am thinking, I will then know what I need to do to clean it up whether it is having a conversation with someone who has hurt my feelings or confronting something I have done wrong.
Preoccupied
I have become so preoccupied with chasing the future that I forget to love in the present. In the moment, I have a to-do list at the forefront of my mind. I think of every activity as a checklist, working toward completing a series of tasks that don't really matter. I keep waiting for my life to happen that I stall living now. There are no guarantees. I get this moment, and I have to pray I get more. The struggle is to make sure I am not returning a perfectly good gift. That I don't say "Thanks but no thanks. I choose to sit on the sidelines waiting for something better."
Let the light shine through.
I am starting the new year with just one resolution. , to express gratitude daily. Each day I will write down what I am thankful for to be content with what I have.
Can't Be a Bull Any More
I have never had experience with babies before. I used to be afraid of them because of how fragile they are. See, my mom has always called me a bull in a china shop. I have had the klutz curse my whole life, and I have been terrified of holding babies because I can't afford to have a clumsy moment. It's a life!
The first time I held my baby seconds after her debut was the only time I have ever held a newborn. Yes, I was frightened, but I can't explain the joy I was overwhelmed with. I couldn't believe she is mine. I have felt since an everlasting burst of happiness and adoration (even though she is keeping me up all night). I look at her and how she is continuously growing beneath my eyes, and I beg God to slow down time. I can't tolerate the idea of her growing up. I want her to be 7 pounds forever.
I have paranoid moments when I am holding her and walking around the house. I feel like I am her body guard making sure that I am clearing every door way. There is nothing on the floor that could cause me to trip or stumble. This little baby, bundle of joy, is my responsibility, and I can't be a bull in a china shop any more.
Silence
In some ways, I used to be afraid of silence. I would have to have music playing or a tv show in the background when I was alone at home. After today, I realized how important silence is, what peace it can bring. Constant noise means that we miss out on peace that comes from just being.
Happy After Earth Day! Yes, I know what you are thinking. Earth Day is that awesome that it deserves a day every day. Our planet deserves honor and respect. It gives us everything we need to survive, so we definitely should treat our blue ball with great love, kindness, and respect.
Some of you may be wondering, how can I go green? How can I implement Earth Day into my every day? Well, I have lots of tips for you. One of my favorites though involves a bright orange Home Depot bucket.
I don’t know about you, but my shower takes forever to heat up, a good 5 minutes. I could stomach the water I wasted wait for it to get hot, so my husband bought us a Home Depot bucket to store the wasted water in while we wait for the water to get to a delightful temperature.
Our process is this: 1. Grab the bucket from outside. 2. Put the bucket underneath the showerhead. 3. Wait for the water to get hot, remove the bucket and jump in. 4. Take the water in our bucket and water plants or rinse off items that don’t need to be in the utmost sanitary care (i.e. lunch boxes).
We save so much water, and it is super easy. I totally recommend it. We save two to three gallons a day.
Happy #EarthDay!
Go on and dance!
This weekend I was reminded how important it is to dance through life. When you move and groove, you can see the beauty that surrounds you. I forgot that, but an Irish friend I made this weekend showed me that.
My friend that I mentioned came to the restaurant full of life. You could tell just by her smile she knew how to really live. She did not think one moment about what another person thought about her. She had fun, did her thing, and danced. That was her prerogative, and she stood by it. She would turn and look at me, and then she would point to a dance floor she created. She said, " C'mon, let's dance now." I looked at her thinking, "Is this a dance floor?" To her, that didn't matter. I realized it shouldn't to me either. We started dancing, and I haven't felt that free in a long time.
My friend left the dance floor, and I started to wonder why. I then saw her bringing other people to shake their groove thang. The other women had the same look I did. They felt liberated. They were dancing on this nontraditional dance floor and had a blast. My friend was giving them a great gift. She was showing them how we are meant to be free. We are meant to feel liberated.
When we step out of minds and be ourselves, that is when we can truly be free. When we chose to dance and stop looking around, that is when we can really be ourselves.
Passion Storm
I can still smell the sand on the playground. I can still hear the chains jingle from the swings. I can still feel the touch of the plastic slides. I remember everything like it was yesterday. I was in 2nd Grade, and I got one of my first passion storms. There was a kid in my class that everyone loved to pick on. He was a tad slow, and everyone harassed him about it. I could not. I didn't like bullies, and I certainly didn't understand why everyone had to pick on anyone in the first place. I watched this student every day get teased, and I didn't do anything. One day though, the passion storm came rolling in, and I wasn't going to stand by for one more second. The storm hit faster than a car on a racing track. I didn't expect it. Anger was rising up in me, and then my passion carried through. A group of boys were pushing and circling around that student, and no one was helping him. He was crying, and I watched as no one came to rescue him. The passion storm was not going to allow me to stay quiet. I was going to roll in something fierce, and those bullies wouldn't know what hit them. All of a sudden, I start running as fast I could toward that group of boys, and I started yelling at them saying something profound like, "You and you, not cool. You're mean." I am sure it was totally legit. I pushed the bullies off the student, and then I held his hand and walked him off the playground. The passion storm made it's way in, and it then made it's exit. It left behind remnants of the journey it made. The passion storm came to get me angry and move me to action. It created a sense of urgency, and I was to do something about it. From that moment on, I decided to take a stance against bullies. Passion storms have come and gone throughout my life. They heighten my senses, increase my intuition, and direct me to causes that need someone to stand up for them. I haven't heard from that student in 16 years, but I will never forget him. What he endured was horrendous. I was glad I could for one moment help him. I think about the times I didn't, and it makes me so sad. Those passion storms roll in for a reason. We are not meant to stand idly by. We are meant to protect and love each other, and passion storms will come throughout your life just like it does for me to remind us that there are so many people, animals, things, and causes to stand up for.
Unknown
Have you ever faced a moment in your life where everything was unknown? You weren't sure about your job. You were questioning your daily routines. You didn't know if you were going down the right path.
I am facing one of those moments right now. I am staring facing the unknown like it was a endless valley surrounded with nothing but darkness, and I am supposed to run toward it with no fear and face whatever forces me to stop. My faith is what makes that unknown, deep abyss not as dark. It actually creates a sunrise that lights up the area, and I know that I will be able to face what comes my way.
Right now though, I am still lost. I see the light moving up through the horizon, but how long it will it take to come my way? I am learning to be patient, and I am seeking the ability to be calm in the midst of chaos. It is better to just be than to foresee.
What does it mean to just be? I am learning that is not sitting my butt in front of the TV. It is not laying in bed with the covers over my eyes hoping the moment has passed. I can't predict what will happen. That valley is there. It will always be, the unknown. What I must chose to do is have faith and know that sunlight will greet me. A path will become visible. At that point, it will be up to me to walk down it.
We are at the happiest place on earth. Today has been amazing. I love Disneyland! / on Instagram http://instagr.am/p/TR7_93N_Pm/
We are at the happiest place on earth. Today has been amazing. I love Disneyland! / on Instagram http://instagr.am/p/TR7_93N_Pm/
Nothing like driving with your windows rolled down and music blaring. / on Instagram http://instagr.am/p/SoIDmmN_PB/