Spoiler alert: I am not a lemon. @waterbaender - Tumblr Blog

SCRUBS (2001–2010)

spookybuttons-deactivated202101

thinking about the time they sent me a seven year old autistic patient to investigate if he was suffering abuse because in every psychological test he kept drawing awful monsters

and I start the consultation already miserable as fuck and I give the kid some pen and paper so I can maybe communicate and see what's on his mind

and then I go WAIT A GODDAMN SECOND I KNOW THOSE MONSTERS

turns out the kid just had a special interest in Five Nights at Freddy's

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I pointed at the monster and went "That's Freddy!" and I've never seen a kid that ecstatic in my life

the mom looked at me as if her son and I belonged at the same satanic cult and that's why I knew the names of the demons in his head

I wrote back to psychologist like "I'm not sure how to explain this but looking up five nights at freddys might bring you progress with this patient"

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at some point the nurses realized the autistic children and I were like, Really Vibing

so they decided to highkey just appoint all of them to my day and it took me almost a month to realize that the fact that I kept arriving and finding that all of today’s appointments were autistic children was Not A Coincidence

anyway this one time there was a kid who was really into christianity but it was like, specifically angels

so I’m trying to start up a conversation with him and I ask what he’s reading and he goes “do you know what a nephilim is”

and like for one hellish second my soul is suckerpunched out of my body and thrown straight into supernatural-fanfic-on-wattpad hell, and then I reassume control of my flesh prison, ignoring the mental edits of Dean and Castiel making out, and go “Aren’t those the guys who are half human and half angel?”

and the kid was so fucking happy but the mom was staring at me like ‘why are you privy to this bit of occult jesus lore’

and my heathen lesbian of a self just looks at her and goes

“i love bible”

cryptid-stimming

x

hopeysl-deactivated20201028

Ah but to be a waterdrop with googly eyes

foulserpent

i love video essay youtubers . i mean like i dont care about the individual i just like to listen to hours long tearing apart and analysis of media while i draw

queerdungeons

howd the victorians get to sleep without asmr vids am i right fellas

queerdungeons

I know they had cocaine you can stop telling me . I dont think you guys know what coke does

closet-keys

not to be a misogynist doctor from the 1800s but i’m pretty sure my uterus is moving around my body, biting my other organs, and also is possessed by the devil

fauxfable

If you need some cheering up, watch this video of my dad trying to get his jacket back from my stubborn cat😂

startrekrenegades

[Dad: Cookie… I’m pretty sure I left my jacket on the back of the chair, NOT in your bed. Cookie… can I have my jacket? Hmm? Can I have my jacket? C'mon. Here, let me have my jacket. Here, this is- this is my jacket, okay. Ah… myyy jacket. Cooookie, you’re not asleep. I KNOW you’re not asleep. This is my jacket. Y– *snickers* Here, here, llllet me have it. Pleeease? Can I have my jacket back? Please??? Little loaf– Cookie: *meow of protest* Dad: *laughing* Aw, c'mon, little loaf, give me my jacket!]