made from 100% recycled butter. @waytogokody - Tumblr Blog

judebot-deactivated20181004

the father, thhe son, and the holy spirit

seven days

six days

five days

four days

don’t listen to him, it’s nothing important

ryanphantom

three days

ryanphantom

two days

ryanphantom

one day

frickmyrick-deactivated20170811

ryan im scared

ryanphantom

happy room-iversary

#yaaaaaaaaaaaaay

gameraboy

I’m a lonesome cowboy.

Peanuts, July 24, 1953

aiweirdness

Ancient wisdom from the neural network

What happens when really old advice meets really new technology?

A recurrent neural network (like the open-source char-rnn framework used here) can teach itself to imitate recipes, paint colors, band names, and even guinea pig names. By examining a dataset, it learns to formulate its own rules about it, and can use these rules to generate new text that - according to the neural network - resembles the dataset. But since the neural network is doing all this without cultural context, or any knowledge of what the words really mean, the results are often a bit bizarre.

In this example, the dataset is a list of more than 2000 ancient proverbs, collected by reader Anthony Mandelli. Some of these are well-known, such as “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.” and “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.” Others are frankly a bit strange: “Where there’s muck there’s brass.” and “A curst cow has short horns.” and “Be not a baker if your head is made of butter.”

What will a neural network make of this ancient wisdom?

If you answered “Really really weird proverbs”, you are correct.

A fox smells it better than a fool’s for a day. No songer in a teacuper. A fool in a teacup is a silent for a needle in the sale. No man is the better pan on the hunder. A mouse is a good bound to receive. Do not come to the cow.

Some of them almost make sense:

A good wine makes the best sermon. A good fear is never known till needed. Death when it comes will have no sheep. An ounce of the heart comes without an exception. A good face is a letter to get out of the fire. No wise man ever wishes to be sick. A good excuse is as good as a rest. There is no smoke without the best sin. A good man is worth doing well. A good anvil does not make the most noise.

While others would be more difficult to pass off as real proverbs:

We can serve no smort. A good face is a letter like a dog. A good earse makes a good ending. Gnow will not go out. Ung. A fox smeep is the horse of the best sermon. No sweet is half the barn door after the cat. There is not fire and step on your dog and stains the best sermon. An ox is a new dogn not sing in a haystar.

One of the oddest things to emerge from the proverb-trained neural network is a strange obsession with oxen. I checked, and there were only three oxen-related proverbs in the dataset, yet they appear frequently in the neural network’s version, and usually as rather powerful creatures.

An ox can lever an enemies are dangerous and restens at home. An ox is not to be given with a single stone. An ox is never known till needed. An ox is as good as a best. An ox is not to be that wound is hot. An ox is a silent for the gain of the bush. An ox is not fill when he will eat forever.

Whatever the internal mythos the neural network has learned from these ancient proverbs, oxen are mysteriously important.

ohvideogames

Developed by Aqua Pacific in 2006 for PlayStation 2

obscurevideogames

Snow White and the 7 Clever Boys

yesterdaysprint

The Bakersfield Californian, California, October 25, 1925

loveamongthesailors

calypsoburch

hilarioushumorfromouterspace

jontronshat-deactivated20150806

Thats a spice meatball

spoopy-skeletoons-deactivated20

What Your Favorite Lackadaisy Character Says About You

Atlas May: You watched Twin Peaks to find out who killed Laura Palmer and were severely disappointed that it became a show about surrealism and coffee slurping FBI sweethearts.

Mitzi May: You have had it up to the rafters with all the men in your life and spend your evenings drinking alone listen to Lana Del Rey, Marina and the Diamonds, and/or Halsey.

Viktor Vasko: You had a sexual awakening when you saw the buff tigers from Zootopia and weep every night that you will never be held in the rippling arms of a feline lumberjack.

Mordecai Heller: You’re holding out for a Kylo Ren redemption arc and have reblogged a picture of Peridot and tagged it “me”.

Wick Sable: You are the most boring person in your friend group and have yet to accept that your only role is to sigh and pull your hair at the sight of their wacky antics.

Ivy Pepper: You are subscribed to at least one makeup tutorial YouTube channel, and your friends are always complimenting the clothes you either made yourself or bought at a thrift store.

Rocky Rickaby: You are a current or former theater kid who is still reeling with embarrassment over the the times you ruined your chances at romantic love by being an overbearing fuckup.

Calvin “Freckle” Murray: Your blog is full of memes about living with mental illness and using abstract gallows humor as a coping mechanism.

Edmund Church: You’ve eaten monopoly money before.

Lacy Hardt: You’re working in retail and hating every hellish moment of it.

Dorian “Zib” Zibowski: You either have an unyielding fetish for musicians, or are a musician with an unyielding fetish for yourself.

Nina McMurray: You reblog sexual posts telling people to love Jesus and to go to church.

Horatio Bruno: You have the comic where Alfred beats up Superman framed on your wall.

Dr. Quackenbrush: You have a McElroy level obsession with horses.

Captain Kehoe: You listen to nothing but Jimmy Buffet.

Dominic Drago: You romanced Nick Valentine in Fallout 4.

Mrs. Babka: You, without a hint of irony, cried when nobody came to eat PawPaw’s burgers.

Virgil: You know how the comic will end, and you know he’s a key player in the events to come.

Nicodeme Savoy: You fantasize about dating a country boy but are painfully aware that real country boys are belligerent idiots at best and racist homophobes at worst.

The Pig Farmers: You are a real country boy.

Serafine Savoy: You are part of witch tumblr and channel all your magical energies into destroying the gender binary and cursing Donald Trump.

The Arbogasts: When playing RPGs, you give up on the main quest and decide to raise a family and grow crops, only picking up a weapon to defend against bandits.

Asa Sweet: You are a contrarian that everybody dreads being around.

lackadaisycats

Fascinating. Reposting with apologies to any genuinely nice country boys out there. ;)

waytogokody

The Rocky one is too fuckin real

distinguishedbaloney

sixpenceee

Snow Removal Train, Skagway, Alaska

#I fucking love trains

rsbenedict-deactivated20181216

Hooooly shit. According to this writer, Xfinity is falsely impersonating its customers in order to post anti-net neutrality comments on the FCC website.

Try to even it out by visiting gofccyourself.com and hitting +EXPRESS and leaving a pro-net neutrality comment.

oldmanyellsatcloud

Oh, and they just sued a cease and desist against the website outing them on this:

Comcastroturf.com explains to the public that “someone has submitted nearly half a million anti-net neutrality comments to the FCC, many of which appear to be completely fake — using stolen names and addresses,” and gives anyone an opportunity to check if their name is being used without their knowledge. Today, Fight for the Future released a statement to announce that Comcast’s attorneys had sent them a cease and desist order that insists the group “take all steps necessary to see that the Domain Name [Comcastroturf.com] is assigned to Comcast.”

purified-zone

Oh

stealyourshiny

My name was on there and I’ve never been a comcast customer…. you better check for your name!

sithrightsactivist

wow, I was on there too, and same here, never been a comcast customer in my life. check and make sure! this is so gross

wilwheaton

SIGNAL FUCKING BOOST. Fuck Comcast.

damnyourdarkeyes

I asked Neil Gaiman if he'd do a live reading of the Cheesecake Factory menu if I raised $500,000 for a charity of his choice. And because he's not just a great artist but a great person, he said yes. He chose UNHCR, the United Nations Refugee Agency. I want to hit this goal by World Refugee Day on June 20. You read that right. If we hit $500K, Neil has kindly agreed to do a live reading of the greatest restaurant menu of all time. It's about 8000 pages, last time I checked. Have you heard Neil's voice? Mellifluous, I tell you. There's a reason he won an award for audiobooks along with all the 18,000 other things he's won as an author/screenwriter/producer/raconteur/hero. FYI, the hashtag for this silliness is #neilcake. Why? Because it is silly and good. I'll arrange with Neil at his convenience to do the reading within the next year in a public setting, whether onstage or online. If it's onstage, I'll sell tickets and donate profits after costs to UNHCR. Regardless, I will make the event available to the general public via livestream or a lovely video you can watch later whilst weeping at the beauty of Neil Gaiman saying "avocado egg rolls." You think you loved "American Gods" or "Sandman" or "Good Omens" or his "Doctor Who" episodes or the other 18,000 great things he's written? This will almost certainly be better or at least ...

Help refugees. Make Neil Gaiman read the Cheesecake Factory menu.

This is completely full of win.