Hey guys, doing a track by track rundown of each of the songs on the new EP. Really grateful for everyone’s support so far!
Everyone I Know, Just Holding On by beat radio
Track one is called “Alchemy.” I sort of half-joked when I first shared this song that I always swing for the fences when it comes to writing songs. Ambition is a weird thing to talk about. I still daydream about writing that one perfect, simple song that connects with people on a large scale. A song that breaks through. The white whale. I have ideas about how this kind of song should feel. The lyrics should be direct and straightforward - universal. The chords should be simple. The chorus should be uplifting, the melodies should stick in your head.
There are a handful of songs I think about in these terms. “Falling Slowly” by Glen Hansard and Markéta Irglová is one that I think about often. Probably because I had followed Glen’s work for a while before it was written, and he sort of writes the same brand of songs that I try to write. There are others, though - “Masterpiece” by Big Thief, or “The Story” by Brandi Carlile. Even going all the way back to when I was starting out performing, hearing a song like “Babylon” by David Gray. I’ve been fascinated by all of these songs, I’ve studied them to try to figure out what makes them work. One observation I’ve made is that they are usually a sort of perfect distillation of what the artist does well. Not necessarily their best or most interesting song, but the most direct and undeniable.
Anyway, I’ve been trying to write that sort of song for a couple decades. I’ve never been successful at it, but I take solace in the notion that reaching for the goal generally brings some sort of worthwhile result. I’ve got lots of glorious, joyful failures. As I was writing “Alchemy”, I felt like it had the potential to be this kind of world changing, break through song. I mean, I was probably wrong. I usually am. I’m guessing I’d know by now if I’d hit it just right. The universe would have given me some sort of indication. But then again, you never know, maybe it just needs the right context? I’ve thought about that a lot also. Like, would “Falling Slowly” have captured the world’s imagination without the context of the film Once?
I’m not so naive as to pretend that there isn’t a lot more that goes into it. The truth is I’m not all in like the artists I mentioned were. I’ve never really been committed enough to the career part of music, if I’m really honest. I didn’t want to sacrifice things that those artists did. I stayed home, had a family. So, there’s that. There’s the work. There’s also a bit of luck, and serendipity. Most people will tell you that. I think there’s also spiritual work you have to do. You have to be ready for the universe to move with you. You’ve got to be ready. I think there’s a fearlessness that you need. Whether or not I was ever meant for any of that, I still feel compelled to make songs. So, I keep the dream alive, and it gives me a sense of purpose.
“Alchemy” came out of a hard time I was going through. I write songs for lots of different reasons. Most often I’m trying to fight off a lingering sadness, a kind of low-grade depression. This song came out of an especially low period where I had sort of collapsed into myself. I wasn’t there for my wife Liz. I was there physically, but emotionally I was gone, and she was left to deal with some intense real life shit all alone. Songs don’t make these sort of things better. Therapy works. Leaning into vulnerability and taking inventory. Honest and open communication is hard work that you’ve got to do every day. I’m 41 years old, I feel like a beginner all the time. But I’m all in with Liz. When you’ve got a partner like her, you give it all you’ve got.
But, I also wrote the song. Maybe it was just something I had to do for myself. I obsessed over the lyrics and arrangement for a year. I recorded 5 or 6 different versions of it. The white whale. That holy grail. I wanted the song to be my salvation. I remember writing down the line “I know I haven’t been here, and its been a hard year, but I’ve got faith in the future.” I wanted to sing it so I could believe it, and make it real. I wanted to transcend the space between us.
I believe in what the song says, that love will save you. That two people can come together and it can be magic. It can transcend the darkness. So now that the song is done I hope it captures the world’s imagination. But if it doesn’t that cool too. I’ll always have it, to sing and play. I’ll hold it close, a sort of talisman of a hard time that we survived, and came out stronger.
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