Wellreads

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Blue Moon

When do you have a very cold stripper?

Once in a blue moon. (hence the cold butt sticking out)

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I read only to please myself

I read only to please myself

I read only to please myself, and enjoy only what suits my taste. (Voltaire)

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Choose a Job

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” Confucius

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Bad artists always admire each other's work

Bad artists always admire each other’s work

Bad artists always admire each other’s work. They call it being large-minded and free from prejudice. But a truly great artist cannot conceive of life being shown, or beauty fashioned, under any conditions other than those he has selected.

(Oscar Wilde)

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When it is a question of money

When it is a question of money

When it is a question of money, everybody is of the same religion. (Voltaire)

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Horny guy

When do men get horny? When they look in the mirror

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Children begin by loving their parents

Children begin by loving their parents

Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them.

(Oscar Wilde)

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Madness is to think

Madness is to think

Madness is to think of too many things in succession too fast, or of one thing too exclusively. (Voltaire)

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Albert EinStien

The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking…the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker.”

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Tell someone their fly is open....

Tell someone their fly is open….

are you afraid of heights? your fly is!

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The So Called

The so-called Pythagoreans, who were the first to take up mathematics, not only advanced this subject, but saturated with it, they fancied that the principles of mathematics were the principles of all things. (Aristotle)

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Nuts!

One day two seasoned hunters took a rookie to go on a hunting trip. After they got to the hunting site, the two pros took the rookie to a tree and told him, “Stay here. Don’t move, and no matter what, don’t make any sound. Wait for the deer to get close enough so you can shoot the deer. But under no circumstances should you make a sound!” With that, they left to find their own spots to stake out.

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Green balls

What do you have when you have two green balls in your hand?

complete controll of a leperchan!

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I may not agree

I may not agree

I may not agree with a word that you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. (Voltaire)

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Rebecca

There was once a beautiful woman named Rebecca who lived with 3 men: an author, an artist, and a blind man.They each visited her once a day. One day Rebecca was taking a shower when she heard a knock at the door. So she put on a towel and answered the door. It turned out to be the artist. He said ” Congratulate me, Congratulate me, I have just finished a masterpiece.” Rebecca didn’t care so she…

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Life is shipwreck

“‎Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats.”   Voltaire

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Urinal Quiz

Guys, see how ingrained where you stand at the urinal is in YOUR brain.Urninal (320K)Note: Our “Send this Joke to A Friend” email thingy doesn’t transmit programs. But if you see this in email, you can click on the link above!

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