A/N: My goodness it’s been forever since I’ve posted anything worth reading. This isn’t my usual Winchester fic. It’s not even a Supernatural fic. It’s Marvel, but not Steve or Bucky. I’ve also replaced Scarlett Johansson with our reader. She will be Black Widow. You’ll see why I did it, when you read it. Well, here you go. OH! And this was supposed to be one part, and has morphed into two!
Warnings: Angst (because I’m the princess of angst.)
Pairing: Jeremy Renner x Reader
Summary: The reader and Jeremy are having a hard time settling into the mind space of filming for the Vormir scene. (actual scene is in italics)
Sitting on the couch in your trailer, elbow propped up on the back, fingers against you lips, nails between your teeth as you stare out the window lost in thought. You had been dreading this ever since the Russo’s gave everyone the script at the table read. As soon as you saw that Cint and Natasha were heading to Vormir and what was going to happen, you and your husband held each other a little tighter. The brother’s kept everything so quiet, that no one knew what was going to happen. They kept everything to themselves, until it was time to sit around the table and read together. Even then, they still were still changing things. You would be told one thing and then when you arrived on set to film, you would be handed a new script. Except, this. This they were keeping. You just had a feeling.
A knock on your trailer door, pulls you back to reality. You and move to the door, pushing it open to greet the PA on the other side. Time to head to hair and makeup. You grab your AirPods and phone. Slipping the buds in your ears, you scroll through your music and selecting ‘Rescue Me’ by Thirty Seconds to Mars. You allow the music to fill your ears and clear you mind. You give Mary and Deborah a smile as you sit in one of the chairs. Nothing is said as they begin to turn you into Black Widow. Your long hair being braided down your back, your makeup giving you a natural beauty look. Waterproof eye makeup because they knew that tears would be shed today.
You’re so absorbed into your music, that you don’t see the room get brighter as the door opens and Jeremy walks in. Deborah gives your hair a few puffs of hair spray before stepping away, giving you a moment to let everything set. Jeremy can see how lost you are, as he moves behind you. You jump when you feel his hands lad on your shoulders. You look into the mirror and pull on of the pods from your ear.
“You okay?” He asks, gently. Stroking his thumbs over your shoulders.
You nod and give a small smile. “Yeah, just ready.” You reach your own hand up to hold his, feeling the warmth radiating off of him, giving you comfort.
He nods. His hair floppy but wild, from sleep. “We got this.” He kisses the back of your head and giving your hand a squeeze, before letting you go and sitting in the chair beside you so that the girls can do his hair and makeup.
“Yeah.” You stand from your seat. “I’m gonna get a quick snack and some water. Want anything?” You stand close to him, but out of Mary’s way. Reaching for his hand again. His wedding band, gleaming on his finger.
He shakes his head. “No, I’m okay. I’ll meet you on set?”
You nod, squeezing his hand and leaning towards him, pressing a kiss to his lips. Pulling back, you give him another smile and walk out of the trailer, fitting the earbud back in place and letting the music fill your ears again.
You and Jeremy stood close to your markers, wrapped around each other, mentally preparing yourselves for what was about to happen. Filming scenes like this is always difficult, no matter what movie you were filming. This time was different though. You were saying goodbye to a character that has been with you for almost ten years now. You were also filming the scene with Jeremy, the man that you’ve been in love with since you filmed Avengers together. The two of you have been married for the last four years. You’ve spent the last six years together and now it was ending. Not your marriage, but your Marvel days together.
You know he was having a hard time, too. Maybe even harder, considering he had to imagine you dying right before his eyes. He is a such a great actor; he’ll get the scene done no problem. It was after that worried you. How would this scene affect him? You were going to find out.
You pull away from him enough, that you can put your forehead again his. Eyes closed, breathing each other in. You can hear the crew moving around you both, getting the set ready. You can hear the click of the camera as the on-set photographer took photos, probably drooling over the affection between you and your husband. You’ll have to remember to ask for copies of them.
Opening your eyes and pulling back, the tiniest bit. “You ready?” you ask, your voice no higher than a whisper.
He peels his eyes open, looking at you with his blue eyes. He gives his head the slightest shake. “No. How am I supposed to do this? How am I supposed to imagine you like that?” His jaw clenching as he grits his teeth together.
“I know it’ll be tough but as soon as they call cut, I’ll be with you. I’ll be right here.” He shifts his gaze away from you and gives an unconvinced nod. You bring your hands up, one on his cheek and the other on his neck, bringing his attention back to you. “I love you. We can do this.” Your voice stern, filling him with the confidence his needs to pull himself together.
He nods one last time, before kissing you. Quick, but filled with everything he is.
You pull away from each other and stand on your marks, keeping your gaze on each other a moment longer before Anthony calls for everyone’s attention.
Cameras rolling. You sat on the rocks, snow falling around you. Jeremy standing in the center with Ross, playing Red Skull, behind you. One camera focused on your face, the other focused on the three of you.
“How’s it going?” Clint asks with a wave and a chuckle, stepping towards you with a shake of his head. “Jesus. Maybe he’s making this shit up.”
“Why? Because he knows your daddy’s name?” He asks, pacing.
“I didn’t.” You give your head a slow shake. “Thanos left here with the stone. Without his daughter. That’s not a coincidence.”
All Clint can say is “Yeah.” Staring into the distance.
“Whatever it takes.” You murmur.
Clint turns towards you. “Whatever it takes.” You look over at him, finally looking at him for the first time since sitting down.
You stand and move towards hm. “If we don’t get that stone billions of people stay dead.”
He holds your gaze for a second longer before looking out at the horizon. “Then I guess we both know who it’s gotta be.”
You keep your gaze on his profile and nod. “I guess we do.”
He looks down and takes your hand into his, you bring your other hand up and secure it around the back of his, holding it between yours. “I’m starting to think we mean different people here, Natasha.”
“For the last five years, I’ve been trying to do one thing. Get to right here. That’s all it’s been about. Bringing everybody back.” You stand a little closer to him.
“Oh, don’t you get all decent on me now.” You can hear the pleading in his voice.
“What? You think I want to do it? I’m trying to save your life, you idiot.”
“Yeah well, I don’t want you to. How’s that?” He shifts on his feet. “Natasha, you know what I’ve done. You know what I’ve become.”
“Well, I don’t judge people on their worst mistakes.”
The sadness creeping on his face, makes your heart clench. “Maybe you should.”
Raising your chin, you give him a small smirk. “You didn’t.” You can feel your throat growing tight with the emotion that you are trying to keep down.
A beat passes between you both.
“You’re a pain in my ass, you know that.”
Your face trembles, just slightly. You both lean forwards and press your foreheads together. You’re shaking, you know he can feel it. You can see him trying to hold himself together. His jaw ticking with each breath he takes.
Suddenly, he’s pulling back and making you look up at him. “Okay. You win.” You take in a small breath as he gives you the smallest smile before taking you down and pining you to the ground beneath him. “Tell my family, I love them.” He grunts as you quickly switch positions. His back to the floor, you are standing over him, fist pointed at him, suit lighting up.
“You tell them yourself.”
He groans, knowing he was supposed to being shocked by the weapon attached to your wrist. You turn and start to run towards the edge, ready to jump. He quickly stands and fires an arrow; an explosion of rubble makes gives you your cue to fly to the right. Landing with a grunt, you roll onto your stomach and watch as he gives you a sad smile, before taking off into a run.
He leaps over the edge, ready to fall to his demise. What he isn’t expecting, is for you to throw yourself onto his back, attach a hook to his belt and launch the other end into the stone edge behind you. Both of you being jerked at the force, you slipping from his grasp until he catches your wrist in his hand.
“Damn you.” He grunts out. He looks behind him and up, trying to find a way to save you. He looks back down, trying to reach for your other hand. He grunts and groans, trying to pull you up. You don’t say anything, you just look up at him with a calm expression, panting. He can feel you start to slip, and he squeezes your wrist tighter. “Wait.” He puffs out. Quietly whispering, “come on.”
You try to calm your breathing, staying calm for him. “Let me go.”
He looks back up and then back at you. Pleading with his eyes. “No.” He shakes his head. “No, please no.”
You tremble but give a slight nod. “It’s okay.” You whisper with so much affection.
That’s his breaking point, the moment he had been dreading. Tears form in his eyes, the blue of his irises looking like the ocean and giving you a sense of peace. “Please.” He begs.
You give him a nod and then you manage to get your footing on the wall, and you launch yourself off with a grunt, your wrist ripping from his hand as you begin to descend. You can see his face twist into agony and wretched wail leaving his body.
You fall onto the mats below and lay still. Listening to your husband wail and sob above you, waiting for someone to call cut. You see him clinging to the rope that’s attached to him, crying as he looks down at your unmoving torso.
“Cut!” Joe calls. Giving the all clear for movement behind the camera. “Great job guys, I think we got it. The only thing we will need to get is a shot of Y/N after the fall, but that was amazing. That’s lunch guys.”
You climb off the mat and wait for the stunt team to remove your harness for around your waist. You were ready to get back to Jeremy. As soon as the last wire is removed from your belt, you move towards the cliff set up, beginning your climb. Jeremy is moving down the cliff at the same time and meets you in the middle, gathering you in his arms.
You can feel him trembling and you grip him harder. “It’s okay. I’m right here. I’m okay.” You whisper in his ear, stroking the back of his head. He sinks the both of you to the ground, holding you in his lap. You wait until he calms down a bit to pull back from him. Holding his face within your hands, you look into his sad eyes. You never want to see that devastated look on his face ever again.
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