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https://twitter.com/toi139/status/802157503039447040?s=09 @toi139
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oozey mess
tumblr dot com

Game Changer & Make Some Noise

Love Begins

No title available

Product Placement

titsay
The Bowery Presents
No title available
Noah Kahan
One Nice Bug Per Day
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Fai_Ryy
Phantogram Three

Origami Around
noise dept.
Today's Document
seen from Argentina

seen from Canada
seen from Türkiye

seen from Malaysia

seen from United Kingdom
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Canada
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seen from Vietnam
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seen from United States
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seen from Brunei
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seen from Dominican Republic

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seen from Venezuela
@what-an-odd-ood
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https://twitter.com/toi139/status/802157503039447040?s=09 @toi139
Fun fact: Ka-ching is the sound SM hears every time they look at EXO.
cashier: sorry for your wait. we’re short-staffed today
millennial: oh that’s ok no worries :)
baby boomer:
THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER
they both look a little nervous about what the other one might write
then just the biggest smiles when they are reassured yet again how much they just love each other
BLESS THESE PRECIOUS SOULS.
HERE’S THE THING THOUGH
I used to work for a call center and I was doing a political survey and I called this number that was randomly generated for me and the way our system worked was voice-activated so when the other person said hello you’d get connected to them, so I just launch right into my “Harvard University and NPR blah blah blah” thing and then there’s this long pause and I think the person’s hung up even though I didn’t hear a click
And then I hear “you shouldn’t be able to call this number.”
So I apologize and go into the preset spiel about because we aren’t selling anything, etc. etc. and the answer I get is
“No, I know that. What I mean is that it should be impossible for you to call this number, and I need to know how you got it.”
I explain that it’s randomly generated and I’m very sorry for bothering him, and go to hang up. And before I can click terminate, I hear:
“Ma’am, this is a matter of national security.”
I accidentally called the director of the FBI.
My job got investigated because a computer randomly spit out a number to the Pentagon.
This is my new favourite story.
When I was in college I got a job working for a company that manages major air-travel data. It was a temp gig working their out of date system while they moved over to a new one, since my knowing MS Dos apparently made me qualified.
There was no MS Dos involved. Instead, there was a proprietary type-based OS and an actually-uses-transistors refrigerator-sized computer with switches I had to trip at certain times during the night as I watched the data flow from six pm to six AM on Fridays and weekends. If things got stuck, I reset the server.
The company handled everything from low-end data (hotel and car reservations) to flight plans and tower information. I was weighed every time I came in to make sure it was me. Areas of the building had retina scanners on doors.
During training. they took us through all the procedures. Including the procedures for the red phone. There was, literally, a red phone on the shelf above my desk. “This is a holdover from the cold war.” They said. “It isn’t going to come up, but here’s the deal. In case of nuclear war or other nation-wide disaster, the phone will ring. Pick up the phone, state your name and station, and await instructions. Do whatever you are told.”
So my third night there, it’s around 2am and there’s a ringing sound.
I look up, slowly. The Red phone is ringing.
So I reach out, I pick up the phone. I give my name and station number. And I hear every station head in the building do the exact same. One after another, voices giving names and numbers. Then silence for the space of two breaths. Silence broken by…
“Uh… Is Shantavia there?”
It turns out that every toll free, 1-900 or priority number has a corresponding local number that it routs to at its actual destination. Some poor teenage girl was trying to dial a friend of hers, mixed up the numbers, and got the atomic attack alert line for a major air-travel corporation’s command center in the mid-west United States.
There’s another pause, and the guys over in the main data room are cracking up. The overnight site head is saying “I think you have the wrong number, ma’am.” and I’m standing there having faced the specter of nuclear annihilation before I was old enough to legally drink.
The red phone never rang again while I was there, so the people doing my training were only slightly wrong in their estimation of how often the doomsday phone would ring.
Every time I try to find this story, I end up having to search google with a variety of terms that I’m sure have gotten me flagged by some watchlist, so I’m reblogging it again where I swear I’ve reblogged it before.
But none of these stories even come close to the best one of them all; a wrong number is how the NORAD Santa Tracker got started.
Seriously, this is legit.
In December 1955, Sears decided to run a Santa hotline. Here’s the ad they posted.
Only problem is, they misprinted the number. And the number they printed? It went straight through to fucking NORAD. This was in the middle of the Cold War, when early warning radar was the only thing keeping nuclear annihilation at bay. NORAD was the front line.
And it wasn’t just any number at NORAD. Oh no no no.
Terri remembers her dad had two phones on his desk, including a red one. “Only a four-star general at the Pentagon and my dad had the number,” she says.
“This was the ‘50s, this was the Cold War, and he would have been the first one to know if there was an attack on the United States,” Rick says.
The red phone rang one day in December 1955, and Shoup answered it, Pam says. “And then there was a small voice that just asked, ‘Is this Santa Claus?’ ”
His children remember Shoup as straight-laced and disciplined, and he was annoyed and upset by the call and thought it was a joke — but then, Terri says, the little voice started crying.
“And Dad realized that it wasn’t a joke,” her sister says. “So he talked to him, ho-ho-ho’d and asked if he had been a good boy and, ‘May I talk to your mother?’ And the mother got on and said, ‘You haven’t seen the paper yet? There’s a phone number to call Santa. It’s in the Sears ad.’ Dad looked it up, and there it was, his red phone number. And they had children calling one after another, so he put a couple of airmen on the phones to act like Santa Claus.”
“It got to be a big joke at the command center. You know, ‘The old man’s really flipped his lid this time. We’re answering Santa calls,’ ” Terri says.
And then, it got better.
“The airmen had this big glass board with the United States on it and Canada, and when airplanes would come in they would track them,” Pam says.
“And Christmas Eve of 1955, when Dad walked in, there was a drawing of a sleigh with eight reindeer coming over the North Pole,” Rick says.
“Dad said, ‘What is that?’ They say, ‘Colonel, we’re sorry. We were just making a joke. Do you want us to take that down?’ Dad looked at it for a while, and next thing you know, Dad had called the radio station and had said, ‘This is the commander at the Combat Alert Center, and we have an unidentified flying object. Why, it looks like a sleigh.’ Well, the radio stations would call him like every hour and say, ‘Where’s Santa now?’ ” Terri says.
For real.
“And later in life he got letters from all over the world, people saying, ‘Thank you, Colonel,’ for having, you know, this sense of humor. And in his 90s, he would carry those letters around with him in a briefcase that had a lock on it like it was top-secret information,” she says. “You know, he was an important guy, but this is the thing he’s known for.”
“Yeah,” Rick [his son] says, “it’s probably the thing he was proudest of, too.”
So yeah. I think that might be the best wrong number of all time.
Source: http://www.npr.org/2014/12/19/371647099/norads-santa-tracker-began-with-a-typo-and-a-good-sport
to brighten your day, here is some young mark hamill (aka luke skywalker, hero of the galaxy). wearing a sweater. cuddling a kitten. enjoy! (x)
I’m the cat
Democrats introduce a bill to prevent Donald Trump from launching a nuclear war
Senator Ed Markey and Rep. Ted Lieu introduced legislation intended to prevent Trump from using nuclear weapons in a first-strike scenario without the explicit approval of Congress on Tuesday.
The legislation is titled the “Restricting First Use of Nuclear Weapons Act of 2017.“
The two legislators issued a press statement on the bill co-signed by William Perry, who served as secretary of defense in former President Bill Clinton’s administration. Read more
It’s terrifying that we need this, and horrifying that this isn’t already in place.
Them: Oh you don’t want this cat. He’s wild and he bites everyone and he’ll never just sit nicely in your lap. He’s a project cat.
Me: That’s okay, I’m a project person.
Two weeks later:
He won’t leave.
@donskoi
Tell us your secret oh great kitty whisperer.
Step one: let him hide or shy away from you if he wants to. He wouldn’t let me touch him for a couple days after we got back from the shelter. It was more important that he felt comfortable than that I touched him.
Step two: make yourself nonthreatening. In my case this meant being very quiet, bringing food and lying down on the ground within his eyesight as an invitation to investigate.
Step three: watch his body language and don’t do things that make him uncomfortable. Turns out my cat often bit when he was overstimulated so I made sure not to overwhelm him.
Step four: draw lines, but not with brute force. Even though his biting wasn’t meant to hurt, it was eventuallto be harmful. So I decided when he bit me, I’d yelp “ow!” And then withdrew all physical contact for a few minutes, sometimes leaving the room.
Step four: provide a good outlet for destructive behaviors. Aka PLAY WITH HIM, SEVERAL TIMES A DAY.
Step four: be patient.
Step five: get lucky and somehow pick up the best cat in the entire shelter. I don’t know how it happened but he’s a godsend. He’s literally cuddled me out of a panic attack. We both really needed each other.
Why Wayne got socks in the jacuzzi
those are his hooves you bitch
@nomercyrun
I’ve never been more emotional about any social media post in my entire life
UPDATE: guys Beth Broderick tweeted yesterday that this Salem is THE SAME SALEM!!! He’s 20 years old man!!!! 20!
That Salem is still kicking is all I care about.
why are breakfast dates not a more popular thing? like forget your 9pm fancy dinner reservation, lets go eat pancakes at 9am in our pjs
the baudelaires every time olaf shows up in a ridiculous costume:
this is the funniest thing I’ve seen all week
Meanwhile Hillary is looking at the camera like she’s in the office and Michelle is presenting pure restrained disdain.
The best thing to have come out of 2016.
This made me happy
I love this
Aggressive Retsuko episode 39
Retsuko is never not relatable.
i love that when poe says “that droid has a map that leads straight to luke skywalker” finn says “oh you gotta be kidding me”, implying he knows exactly who luke is and that he’s important. i love that when finn mentions luke to rey she says “luke skywalker??? i thought he was a myth” implying she knows exactly who luke is and that he’s important. i love that luke skywalker is a legend, a myth, a celebrity. do you think he has fans
I like to think that not only is he famous but that because he’s so elusive he’s actually reached cryptid status in the star wars universe. people host parties when a new blurry photograph comes out, get into debates over whether he really exists or not, skywalker-sighting hotspots are full of tourists and conspiracy theorists wearing shirts with a lightsaber on that say ‘I want to believe’ in block capitals.