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Today's Document
𩵠avery cochrane š©µ
sheepfilms

shark vs the universe

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Aqua Utopiaļ½ęµ·ć®åŗć§čØę¶ćē“”ć
we're not kids anymore.

Janaina Medeiros

romaā
Claire Keane
d e v o n

Kaledo Art
Sweet Seals For You, Always

Product Placement
Cosimo Galluzzi
NASA
Not today Justin
I'd rather be in outer space šø
DEAR READER
seen from Uruguay
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@wheresyourhat-blog
this speaks to me
Super Soft Merino Crib Blanket - a super easy (even for newbies) knitting pattern from the Purl Bee. Ā Love the colour mix ā and that yarn porn! Ā Nice.
"Brozen," "Bronies," what it all means is "I am so insecure about what I like that I MUST rebrand it as masculine before associating with it."
i read it more as āi hate girls and femininity so much that i am insulted at even the idea that i might have something in common with themā. like, i have a very hard time believing that itās insecurity and not outright hatred that fuels that kind of thing.
http://makeupbag.tumblr.com/
a simplified guide to sexualities
homosexual: sexually attracted to homer simpson
pansexual: gets off to various kitchen utensils
asexual: gets turned on by the first letter of the latin alphabet
demisexual: sexually attracted to you if and only if your blood is half divine
bisexual: can only have sex with two people ever. choose wisely
heterosexual: can only be satisfied by macklemore
Blowjob? or handjob?
full time job with health care benefits
i hate these period pad commercials where they pour the delicate blue liquid directly in the centre. i want you to get fucking spaghetti sauce and just dump it on the pad. thatās a commercial i want to see.
Directors Insulting Each Other
1. Francois Truffaut on Michelangelo Antonioni:
āAntonioni is the only important director I have nothing good to say about. He bores me; heās so solemn and humorless.ā
2. Ingmar Bergman on Michelangelo Antonioni: āFellini, Kurosawa, and Bunuel move in the same field as Tarkovsky. Antonioni was on his way, but expired, suffocated by his own tediousness.ā
3. Ingmar Berman on Orson Welles: āFor me heās just a hoax. Itās empty. Itās not interesting. Itās dead.Ā Citizen Kane, which I have a copy of ā is all the criticsā darling, always at the top of every poll taken, but I think itās a total bore. Above all, the performances are worthless. The amount of respect that movieās got is absolutely unbelievable.ā
4. Ingmar Bergman on Jean-Luc Godard: āIāve never gotten anything out of his movies. They have felt constructed, faux intellectual, and completely dead. Cinematographically uninteresting and infinitely boring. Godard is a fucking bore. Heās made his films for the critics. One of the movies,Ā Masculin, FĆ©minin, was shot here in Sweden. It was mind-numbingly boring.ā
5. Orson Welles on Jean-Luc Godard: āHis gifts as a director are enormous. I just canāt take him very seriously as a thinker ā and thatās where we seem to differ, because he does. His message is what he cares about these days, and, like most movie messages, it could be written on the head of a pin.ā
6. Werner Herzog on Jean-Luc Godard: āSomeone like Jean-Luc Godard is for me intellectual counterfeit money when compared to a good kung-fu film.ā
7. Jean-Luc Godard on Quentin Tarantino: āTarantino named his production company after one of my films. Heād have done better to give me some money.ā
8. Harmony Korine on Quentin Tarantino: āQuentin Tarantino seems to be too concerned with other films. I mean, about appropriating other movies, like in a blender. I think itās, like, really funny at the time Iām seeing it, but then, I donāt know, thereās a void there. Some of the references are flat, just pop culture.ā
9. Nick Broomfield on Quentin Tarantino: āItās like watching a schoolboyās fantasy of violence and sex, which normally Quentin Tarantino would be wanking alone to in his bedroom while this mother is making his baked beans downstairs. Only this time heās got Harvey Weinstein behind him and itās on at a million screens.ā
10. Spike Lee on Quentin Tarantino (and the ān-wordā in his scripts): āIām not against the word, and I use it, but not excessively. And some people speak that way. But, Quentin is infatuated with that word. What does he want to be made ā an honorary black man?ā
11. Spike Lee on Tyler Perry: āWe got a black president, and we going back to Mantan Moreland and Sleep ānā Eat?ā
12. Tyler Perry on Spike Lee āSpike can go straight to hell! You can print that⦠Spike needs to shut the hell up!ā
13. Clint Eastwood on Spike Lee: āA guy like him should shut his face.ā
14.Ā Jacques Rivette on Stanley Kubrick: āKubrick is a machine, a mutant, a Martian. He has no human feeling whatsoever. But itās great when the machine films other machines, as inĀ 2001.ā
15. Jacques Rivette on James Cameron (and Steven Spielberg): āCameron isnāt evil, heās not an asshole like Spielberg. He wants to be the new De Mille. Unfortunately, he canāt direct his way out of a paper bag. ā
16. Jean-Luc Godard on Steven Spielberg: āI donāt know him personally. I donāt think his films are very good.ā
17. Alex Cox on Steven Spielberg: āSpielberg isnāt a filmmaker, heās a confectioner.ā
18. Tim Burton on Kevin Smith (after Smith jokingly accused Burton of stealing the ending ofĀ Planet of the ApesĀ from a Smith comic book): āAnyone who knows me knows I would never read a comic book. And I would especially never read anything created by Kevin Smith.ā
19. Kevin Smith on Tim Burton (in response to āI would never read a comic bookā): āWhich, to me, explains fuckingĀ Batman.ā
20. Kevin Smith on Paul Thomas Anderson (specifically,Ā Magnolia): āIāll never watch it again, but I will keep it. Iāll keep it right on my desk, as a constant reminder that a bloated sense of self-importance is the most unattractive quality in a person or their work.ā
21. David Gordon Green on Kevin Smith: āHe kind of created a Special Olympics for film. They just kind of lowered the standard. Iām sure their parents are proud; itās just nothing I care to buy a ticket for.ā
22. Vincent Gallo on Spike Jonze: āHeās the biggest fraud out there. If you bring him to a party heās the least interesting person at the party, heās the person who doesnāt know anything. Heās the person who doesnāt say anything funny, interesting, intelligent⦠Heās a pig piece of shit.ā
23. Vincent Gallo on Martin Scorsese: āI wouldnāt work for Martin Scorsese for $10 million. He hasnāt made a good film in 25 years. I would never work with an egomaniac has-been.ā
24. Vincent Gallo on Sofia (and Francis Ford) Coppola: āSofia Coppola likes any guy who has what she wants. If she wants to be a photographer sheāll fuck a photographer. If she wants to be a filmmaker, sheāll fuck a filmmaker. Sheās a parasite just like her fat, pig father was.ā
25. Vincent Gallo on Abel Ferrara: āAbel Ferrara was on so much crack when I didĀ The Funeral, he was never on set. He was in my room trying to pick-pocket me.ā
26.Ā Werner Herzog on Abel Ferrara: āI have no idea who Abel Ferrara is. But let him fight the windmills⦠Iāve never seen a film by him. I have no idea who he is. Is he Italian? Is he French? Who is he?ā
27.Ā David Cronenberg on M. Night Shymalan: āI HATE that guy! Next question.ā
28. Alan Parker on Peter Greenaway (specificallyĀ The Draughtsmanās Contact): āA load of posturing poo-poo.ā
29. Ken Russell on Sir Richard Attenborough: āSir Richard (āIām-going-to-attack-the-Establishment-fifty-years-after-itās-deadā) Attenborough is guilty of caricature, a sense of righteous self-satisfaction, and repetition which all undermine the impact of the film.ā
30. Uwe Boll on Michael Bay: āIām not a fucking retard like Michael Bay.ā
x
If I cannot move Heaven, I will raise Hell.
VirgilāsĀ Aeneid, bookĀ VII.312 (via wolf-teeth)
The Onion:
Sources confirmed Thursday that millions nationwide are signing up for Squandr, a new social discovery app employing GPS technology to match users with others in their vicinity who also wasted $2.99 on the same software. āFor me, itās just a fun, no-risk way to meet new people and talk about how we all blew a few bucks on this app,ā said Kelly Harmon, 27, who said she was pleasantly surprised to discover just how many people in her immediate area had the same frivolous spending habits she did. āYou can be in a park or a coffee shop surrounded by strangers, but with this app, you can immediately start up a conversation about how money apparently has no meaning to you whatsoever. Itās pretty cool.ā According to sources, many users are also opting to pay $4.99 for Squandr Premium, which offers the exact features of the original app for an additional two dollars.
Mental Health
Be comforted or comfort someone elseĀ
Coping SkillsĀ
List of Suicide HotlinesĀ
Recovering from self harm
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Overcoming Social Anxiety
Explanation of many mental illnessesĀ
How to help someone with mental illness
Support for those with eating disorders
MusicĀ
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Free digital sculpting tool
silk - interactive art
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Dragon head view tutorial
Drawing expressions
NGE colour paletteĀ
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Free art MyPaint
Body Anaomy
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Flower crown tutorial
Skin colour palette
Pink colour sheet
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Drawing clouds
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Expressions&Legs
All about the human body
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Colour conversion
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WritingĀ
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In The Beginning
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The Introductory Paragraph
Writing Introductory Paragraphs
How to Write an Intro
Paragraph Development and Topic Sentences
Transitions
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Four Components of an Effective Body Paragraph
Writing Paragraphs
Paragraph Development
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Strong Body Paragraphs
Body Paragraphs
Writing Body Paragraphs
How to Write Body Paragraphs
Writing the Body
Writing Body Paragraphs
Body Paragraphs
Body Paragraphs that Defend a Thesis
How to Write Body Paragraphs
The Perfect Paragraph
Topic Sentences
Writing Topic Sentences
Topic Sentences
Topic Sentences
The Topic Sentence
Paragraphs and Topic Sentences
The Topic Sentence
Topics, Main Ideas, and Topic Sentences
Writing a Good Topic Sentence
Good Topic Sentences
Writing Effective Conclusions
Introductions and Conclusions
Conclusion Paragraphs
Conclusion Strategies
Conclusions
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The Concluding Paragraph
Ending the Essay
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How to Write a Conclusion
Writing Conclusions
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Argument
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Argumentative Essay
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How to Write a Good Argument
How to Write an Argumentative Essay
Writing Conclusions to Argumentative Essays
Argumentative Essay
Persuasive Essay Writing
Writing Concluding Paragraphs
Constructing the Argumentative Essay
Writing About Poetry
Writing About Poetry
Writing About Poetry Q & A
Poetry Explications
Writing About Poetry
Writing About Poems
Explicating a Poem
Writing About Poetry
Writing a Thesis Paper About a Poem
How to Start a Poetry Introduction
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Poetry Explication
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Sample Expository Essay
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Expository Essays
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Expository Essays
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How to Write a Research Paper in Literature
Writing a Research Paper
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How to Write a College Application Essay
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Narrative Essay
Writing a Narrative Essay
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Study TipsĀ
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FoodĀ
Thousands of quick and easy snack recipes
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Tons of pies
Cookie dough you can eat
Shelf life of food
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Website for lack of ingredients
currently lookin 4 a sugar daddy that doesnt wanna do any sexual stuff but just buys me everything i want and tells me im cute
Then I said,Ā damn gramma, maybe I wanted to find out the ending of Anaconda 2 myself
Am I a bug?! website: http://findingpaola.com
twitter/instagram: @findingpaola
hmmmmm
lesbiansā¦ā¦ā¦ what are they