L I V I N G @whospilledmymilk - Tumblr Blog

onlygodknowsimgood63

bakersnail100

habby worm boy is yell at sky

purveyoroflimes100

Why scream

madsciences

he is challenging the gods

factsinallcaps

THE LEGENDARY STORY OF THE TROJAN HORSE DOES NOT INVOLVE THE GREEKS GIVING THE HORSE TO THE TROJANS AS A GIFT. THE GREEKS’ DECEPTION WAS ACTUALLY THAT THEY LEFT THE HORSE AS AN OFFERING TO THE GODDESS ATHENA.

IN THE LEGEND, THEY BASICALLY SENT SOMEONE TO TROY TO SAY “THIS HORSE IS FOR ATHENA, NOT YOU, SO OUR RETREAT BACK TO GREECE IS SAFE. DON’T TRY TO TAKE IT. IT WON’T FIT THROUGH THE GATES OF YOUR CITY, SO THERE’S NO WAY YOU DICKS CAN STEAL IT AND PRETEND YOU GOT IT FOR ATHENA. NOT FOR TROJANS.”

AND THEN TROY WAS LIKE “YOU’RE NOT OUR DAD. WE WON THIS WAR AND WE’RE TAKING YOUR STUPID HORSE AS A TROPHY SO WE’LL ALWAYS REMEMBER HOW BAD GREECE IS AT DESTROYING TROY.”

AND A FEW TROJANS WERE LIKE “THIS IS A TRICK” AND TRIED TO EXPOSE IT AS A TRICK BUT THE REST OF THE TROJANS WOULD HAVE NONE OF IT BECAUSE EVERYONE WAS SWEPT UP IN THE THRILL OF VICTORY, AND ALSO BECAUSE THE GODS KEPT SENDING SNAKES TO STRANGLE ANYONE WHO SAID ANYTHING, BECAUSE THE GREEK GODS HAD NO WORD FOR “SUBTLETY”

THEN AT NIGHT ALL THE GREEKS JUMPED OUT OF THE HORSE LIKE “WE TOLD YOU NOT TO TAKE THE HORSE, WHY ARE YOU SUCH PRIDEFUL DICKS” AND BURNED DOWN THE WHOLE CITY

derinthescarletpescatarian

This makes a lot more sense

sofakeitsfox

Remember when every girl wanted this phone

xoellle-deactivated20190624

yoo if you had this phone in 2005 you were the coolest bitch on the block

itscolossal

More: Wildly Absurd Experimental Body Animations by Esteban Diacono [8 videos]

blankvhs

showin up to tha function unannounced

imhungup

sasha getting a message from one of the most problematic superstars is the perfect third installment for her unfortunate rewards trilogy

hungry-like-virginia-woolf

You know what’s messed up? People make fun of women for reading romance novels in which men are kind, chivalrous and sexually generous to the women they love, but men watching violent hardcore porn where women choke on dicks is considered normal, and ‘shaming’ someone for it is considered more taboo than the porn itself. And women reading romance novels has certainly yet to lead to a culture where men are considered lesser if they don’t emulate the men in the pages. I wonder the fuck why.

ophelias-revenge

Holy shit I’ve never put these two things together before now

nandalorian

This is literally what I wrote my masters’ dissertation on.

thirliewhirl

slightmood

my boss: *giving me critical instructions* you got that?

me: ya

me (in my mind): you make a loop de loop and pull, and your shoes are looking cool :) you go over and back, left to righ

failnation

New PETA ad looks like two guys had a threesome with a chicken and she completely blew their minds.

jennytheundying-deactivated2017

“we must never speak of this”

long-gone-silvers

I legitimately have no idea what this ad was otherwise trying to convey

poplar-shade

like seriously I know that they’re utterly stupid in every way but what even the hell

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

“WE CAN’T FUCK, IT’S BACK”

“Just

just ask her to leave”

“SHE’S LOOKING RIGHT AT ME OH GOD SHE’S LOOKING RIGHT AT ME”

“I’m scared”

“Your scared?

I’M TERRIFIED RIGHT NOW”

“Just lay still

Maybe if it thinks we’re asleep it will leave”

flailmorpho

*whispers* cockblocked

captain-snark

I’m pretty sure both of them are quite happy with meat in their sex life? I mean…this would be amusing if it were two women. But then it might not work with whatever it is they’re trying to express.