In a few days, a new Ghostbusters movie is coming out. Which, is something I haven’t been able to say for 27 years. A lot of people seem to be upset with this fact. A sentiment I don’t seem to understand. You see, Ghostbusters is one of the most important things in my life. If you know me well, you probably already know that. If you don’t know me well at all, you still probably already know that. It’s always just seem to be a part of me. I certainly know I wouldn’t be who I am without it. Which seems kindof silly to say about some movies with 100-foot marshmallow men and dancing toasters. It’s true though. Aesthetically, comedically, creatively - a lot of what I’m made of comes from Ghostbusters. So, my entire life I’ve been on the rollercoaster called “Ghostbusters III.” Multiple scripts. Multiple treatments. Multiple letdowns. “Oscar is grown up and gonna take the reins? That’s awesome.” Over and over. Rumors of casts. Dan Aykroyd’s multiple assurances. Bill Murray’s shredded scripts. The brightest spot in all of it was the completely amazing 2009 video game. It truly is Ghostbusters III. Not even to mention the brilliant IDW series that has been going on for years (not to mention the fact that for a couple years of the comics, the team was mostly women.) Even I was skeptical when the new movie seemed to be really happening. I had been burned before. I was a scorned lover. But then…this is looking more and more real? A cast is really forming? The creator of my beloved Freaks and Geeks? Can I be dreaming? Surely this too will all fall apart, yes? Then on-set photos started popping up. Still, I was skeptical. This isn’t really a thing. This is just screen tests. Lighting tests, I told myself. This will never come out. “Filming has wrapped,” they said. It’ll never see the light of day. It will be one of those rumored movies. That weird 90’s Fantastic Four movie. This is kindof where I started seeing people online talk about how this movie was going to be garbage. “This is going to suck.” “The only thing she’s going to bust is the jumpsuit.” “My childhood is ruined.” I didn’t get it. Guys, look. Those are proton packs. That’s an Ecto-1. “Feminists have to get their fingers in everything.” “More like Paul Fag.” “Why are they ruining my childhood.” Seriously. Look. Like, it looks like a bear trap, but I think it’s a ghost trap maybe? Those are ion streams. Slimer! Do people think that like, once this movie is released, all the other stuff gets fed to the Void Fish and disappears forever? Those things we love will still be there. But now there is MORE Ghostbusters. Things got louder and louder. Articles were written. Things were getting worse it seemed. They claimed it wasn’t about an all female cast. They claimed that it;s because it didn’t need to be done in the first place. That Ghostbusters is too sacred to even touch. More articles in response. I don’t think it helped anything. “Woman Hating Baby Men Too Scared To Handle Badass Chicks” Maybe that wasn’t a real headline, but it probably could have been. I get it though. It felt like dudes just throwing fits. But still I was confused. Dudes, it’s MORE Ghostbusters. More. Like, more Ghostbusters. They’re pitting science against the paranormal and crackin’ wise. That’s what Ghostbusters is. They claimed it wasn’t the same humor. Not the same feeling. Not what we wanted. What did you want? A bunch of old dudes huffing around? I mean, sure, I stand at half salute at the idea of the guys dusting off the gear and getting to it. But, I saw Indiana Jones 4. It’s never as good as you want it to be. Nothing is. What is it then, what we want? Do we want the same exact story? Or the same characters played by new people? Certainly that can’t be good. If remaking this movie at all is sacrilege, then just pumping today’s actors into the iconic original Ghostbusters could never be good enough. To quote a tweet I saw the other day, “Would you really prefer Zac Efron & Jonah Hill going ‘fuckin Slimer got green cum on me bro’” Well, now that I think of it. Yeah, I do want that. I want bro comedy Ghostbusters. And I want Paul Feig’s Ghostbusters. That’s the thing, I want all the possible Ghostbusters. I want Wes Anderson’s Ghostbusters (ironically starring Bill Murray). I want Michael Bay’s Ghostbusters. I want a procedural crime Ghostbusters drama series on NBC. I want HBO’s Original Series: Ghostbusters. I want Sony Animation’s Ghostbusters. I want a Ghostbusters YouTube ARG. I want a German black and white silent Ghostbusters. I want a Ghostbusters cinematic universe in which we see the backstory of every character before we see them all together fighting on screen in a huge mash up movie. I want Blacksplotation Ghostbusters. I want a found footage Ghostbusters movie. I want a Ghostbusters mockumentary. Hell, I want a Ghostbusters documentary. I want Cars, but Ecto-1. I want James Wan’s Ghostbusters. I want Laika’s stop motion Ghostbusters. Or how about a Paranorman sequel in which norman BECOMES a Ghostbuster. How about both. I want Ghostbusters set in 1974 directed by Martin Scorsese. I want a Duplass Brothers Ghostbusters that is some depressing movie about the human connection, but also about some weird science fiction thing or something. I want Terrance Malick’s Ghostbusters. I want so many Ghostbusters movies that Marlon Wayons makes GHOSTBUSTER MOVIE. And I want every rendition of the theme song that will go along with each one. Is this new movie going to be amazing? I dunno. The original was lightning in a bottle. No matter what happens it’s going to be hard to even stand in that shadow. All I know is that we’re getting more Ghostbusters right now. And that makes the 7 year old in me outrageously happy.