What is it like living with an “invisible disability”?
Let’s start out with a rather difficult topic for me. But first, let me explain what a disability is & what makes it “invisible”?
According to the Miriam-Webster dictionary the definition of the word “disability” is “a physical, mental, cognitive, or developmental condition that impairs, interferes with, or limits a person's ability to engage in certain tasks or actions or participate in typical daily activities and interactions”. Some examples of a disability are those that are blind or deaf, have missing limbs or suffer from physical impairments. Those that suffer from a disability often can’t function or live a “normal” life like most do. This is why they use tools such as a wheelchair, or a hearing aide or even a cane as a way to make it easier to navigate the world. However, just because a person has a disability, doesn’t necessarily mean that they are disabled. Many who live with a disability live full active lives. They work, have hobbies, participate in sports, get together with friends & have families. According to the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), those with disabilities are people who “has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities; has a record of such an impairment, or is regarded as having such an impairment”.
What’s an “invisible” disability then? Individuals that suffer from the term “invisible disabilities” are those that suffer from mental impairments such as panic attacks, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), etc. These are all disabilities that are neurological & are something that goes on inside the body such as the brain. These are disabilities that cannot be seen from the outside, hence considered “invisible”. It’s extremely common for the term “disability” to be referred to those in wheelchairs, something physical that can be seen. Unfortunately, others judge someone from what they can see & decide on what they can do by the way they look. Yet those with these invisible disabilities struggle with fatigue, dizziness, debilitating pain, cognitive dysfunctions, brain injuries, learning differences & mental health disorders.
So then how is it to live with a disability that someone can’t physically see? Honestly, it’s a constant struggle, but for everyone it’s different. I grew up not understanding what was wrong with me. I learned things in school differently than others, fascinated by things that maybe other kids wouldn’t necessarily enjoy, & I acted differently than other kids. I spent years hiding this from others because I did not want to be looked at as different, I did not know how to explain why I was feeling a certain way or having the thoughts that I was having. Mainly, I did not want to be looked at as weak. My friends & family look at me & they think nothing is wrong. When I finally started talking about what really was going on, some of my family members thought I was lying, making all of this up. It honestly broke my heart & did not make the situation any better. Even k=now after countless of doctors visits, my significant other still struggles to understand something such as my disabilities because they are things that he’s never gone through so he does not know how to relate to it. The hardest part was when I introduced the idea of a service dog. Poseidon is my service dog; he helps mitigate my disabilities & helps me complete day-to-day tasks that normally would cause me extreme fatigue if I did them on my own. Even with having him with me, others still don’t understand. I bring Poseidon everywhere with me because a lot of my symptoms happen when I am out in public, especially large gatherings of people. I have been told by family members & those close to me that they believe that Poseidon is more of a “burden” (to them, not to me) to have to bring him everywhere we go. Some think that I just “put a vest on him so that I can bring him everywhere” (fake service dogs is a huge issue, but I will talk about that another time). Poseidon is not my “pet” that I “bring everywhere”. & when I’m out in public, I get stared at, not only because I am walking through a store with a dog, but also because there are individuals that are trying to figure out what is wrong with me.
The constant silent judgment can be hard to bare sometimes, especially when you’re having a horrible mental health day; those are days in which your symptoms, such as any pain or emotions may be stronger than most days. Unfortunately it’s not something we can easily “get used to” even though we try. This is why we try to raise awareness of not to “judge a book by its cover”. My mother always said that you never know what is going on in the lives of others. Since being a service dog handler, I’ve noticed more & more criticism occurring towards us. This is why it’s important to understand & raise awareness about these topics.
If you have any questions, please feel free to comment!