I Miss You, what happened to all of my friends?
It’s actually so ironic. Here we are, releasing a song about the isolating nature of social media while at the same time we’re basically spamming our various social media platforms with content and sales pitches about the very same song in an attempt to twist your arm into listening to our music. The hypocrisy of the modern world. It’s strange what we have become/ what we are becoming, nor good or bad per say. Just different. The internet has its pros and cons and the future is unclear. I guess it always has been, it’s truly amazing that we’ve come so far yet in some respects I really do miss somethings that we have left behind. I miss real connection with people, the need to actually build solid relations in the real world not just “staying connected” online. This feeling of disconnection is real for me when I scroll endlessly down a newsfeed for the tenth time that day. Some “friends” are people I once knew years ago, others are long lost childhood mates I met in kindergarten, an old crush I may of had, old work colleagues or someone that still has a Facebook and instagram account but has now passed away and a “memory” pops up… Heavy. You name it, unless you are the type of person that ruthlessly edits your “friendlist” (I ain’t got time for that) overtime you’re going to end up with a vast social network of people you may or may not really know or understand yet you can still form some kind of opinion about them purely based on who they portray themselves to be online.
Despite ’I Miss You’ having a somewhat melancholy undertone, when Thundas were putting this song together we really were having the time of our lives (shouts to Carl Dimataga, you fam too my g). Thundamentals is a band but first and foremost we are close friends. Personally I regard Jess & Morgs more so as family members, my brothers. We have always been a tight unit that was never really affected by the social media/information revolution so we’ve never relied on the internet to make sure we stay in touch, rather as a band we stayed in touch with the revolution itself.
The tune was more or less written in one night and as it was coming together I think all of us felt an instant connection to it. I love songs, and I love when they can alter my mood, ‘I Miss You’ (or “Kodak” which was it’s working title) immediately felt emotionally moving to me. Musicians in my opinion are mood artist, within 3-5 minutes I am aiming to change or alter your mood. I want you to feel something when you listen to it. I don’t care about technique or what cutting edge art can be, unless you feel it I didn’t do my job. I am striving to communicate to you as a person, a mind, a body and a spirit. If you aren’t engaged in the music I create all that means is that I’ve not made a song that’s worth listening too.
Going back a little further, the first idea behind ‘I Miss You’ came when one day on the bus I looked up an noticed that every single passenger had their necks tilted, staring deeply into the blue screen aka the black mirror. The portal to our 2nd life, and also the gateway to the avatar of the concept of our digital selves in general. The digital imprint of who we are online.
Once I realised I was the only one not on my phone, I asked myself to make an effort to stay off my phone for the rest of the trip. Easier said then done apparently, inevitably I got a notification like 5 minutes later and there I am back again staring at my phone. As I scroll down the feed I see my best friend from year 7, an ex-girlfriend that is traveling the world with her partner, a sound tech I met at a gig that is getting married, a member of old band that doesn’t even play music these days and is now forging a new career. Change is the only consent and these days we can watch manicured versions each other all play out in front of our eyes.
For so many of us it’s the only plug we have into the outside world and its current affairs. Both to update ourselves and to voice our own “truths”. Yet at the same time we can’t always trust the information it provides us with and in turn we ourselves can’t always be 100% certain that the opinions we form are correct. Facts. The internet is an endless altered reality with ever changing narratives and opinions, trolls, trends, humour and false truths. On the other side of the screen are real humans but inside the phone, if you want, you can be anybody you wish. If I meet you in the real world you have a lot less to hide behind. No photoshop, no off the cuff brilliant quote you had been toying around with for hours before you tweeted it. Just the real you, vulnerable and unique.
I guess the thing that hits closest to home for me is not the clickbait or the memes or the conspiracy theories. It’s more so watching long lost friends grow up and out of my life…They all post videos and photos of their lives even though we haven’t even spoken or hung out for years. Not because we aren’t still mates per say. Nothing happened to affect the friendship in particular it’s just that sometimes people drift apart over time. Sometimes it’s geographic, sometimes it’s because everyone is sooo busy these days. Whatever reason we all can relate to having a lurk through an old friends profile, a ex-loved one perhaps…We are all ghost of somebodies past. We all miss someone, at least one. The worst thing about it for me is that it’s never quiet enough… Sometimes a photo seems posed and status updates can seem manufactured.
Sometimes I stare at a captured moment and remember who they are in real life, my real memories of them as living and breathing people and I miss that connection we had. True, at least I can watch a version of them online but what’s really going on in their lives. I myself know that there are things I keep hidden from the internet, aspects of who I am and my actual reality. I really do believe everyone to some extent doesn’t “share” everything and furthermore I believe the majority of us only post about the wins not the losses… We are social animals that are feeding off a social feed. No one is really out here actively trying to make themselves look bad unless they are taking the piss or their lives have come to a point where all fucks given are totally forgotten in an attempt to actually express a pure “self” online, I’d say that type of person sits at about 1% of the population to be fair lol. The game is rigged, the way it is up to you though, gathering friends and likes and love hearts and followers and tags, the list goes on… These digital gestures, that’s what has become a type of currency in this world. The more interaction I get on my posts the greater likely hood that I’ll be noticed for my “talents” whatever they may be. Social value plays a massive roll in our lives, social media is a way to keep count. what happened to us and just existing without having to put our own spin on everything we see and do?
Sometimes I think about when I’m an old man, I’ll be able to scroll down my “Timeline”, each post a warped relic of my past… When that day comes will I admit to myself that it’s an accurate portrayal of who I really was as a person. The answer is pure and simply put… NO. Especially as an entertainer in the music industry, but even on my personal accounts. I do not show the real me to the web. For the most part I leave out the juicy bits, I’ve got no real skeletons in the closet? I’m not saying that. I’m just trying to explain that most people, including myself, only share things about ourselves on online that we are comfortable with sharing. We expose some of our personal characteristics but not all of them. We still hold what’s truly sacred close and only share that with a select few.
So I guess, if I could ask for anything it would be that when people listen to this song they appreciate, respect and honour their true friends and family. The ones that you can wholeheartedly share everything with. Maintain those real connections you have, that is the real you, that is the human you. These people are the ones that understand elements of yourself that perhaps you don’t even see.