Michael Shelley Headcanons
Michael is allergic to cats, he is extremely upset about this all the time, one time he was at a friend’s house and they left the room and then came back to Michael holding their cat, and crying, they asked him what was wrong and he just said “Oh no I’m not crying, I’m just severely allergic to cats” while still hugging the cat
Michael is someone who cries all the time, every intense emotion equates to crying, sad? He’s crying. Angry? He’s crying. Afraid? He’s crying. Happy? He’s crying. He also stress cries, all the time, whenever he is crying, it’s best to leave him be, he usually just processes strong emotions by crying for a bit, he’ll be better in a few minutes
Michael keeps little souvenirs from all the random places Gertrude makes him go, it makes him feel better about the constant travel and stress of his job
Michael wears glasses and has glasses chains, there’s a different colorful fun chain to match each outfit he has
Michael has several obsessive compulsive habits, some of his big ones include counting the charms on his glasses chains, clicking pens a certain number of times before he writes, and my personal favorite, turning door handles three times before he opens them (don’t mind me projecting my compulsions on him)
Michael loves spiders, but hates pretty much every other type of bug, worms especially distress him
Michael is so clumsy, he’s too tall, he trips all the time and hits his head on things so often, not in the “cute and clumsy” way, in the “he genuinely has broken so many bones by tripping over his own feet” way, if he hasn’t accidentally injured himself recently, he may have been replaced by a notthem, because someone who isn’t constantly falling over is not Michael
Michael is oblivious, another assistant once asked him “how do you handle all the people who are attracted to you?” And he was so confused, responding with something like “People think I’m attractive?”
Michael has such a hard time conceptualizing the fact that people think he’s attractive because the poor thing is so insecure, he only notices every unsymmetrical feature, he thinks about how he thinks his nose is too pointy, or his face too round, when in reality he is incredibly naturally pretty, someone needs to take him aside and hold him close and tell him he beautiful, he deserves it
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