I got a new tarot deck from my favorite artist. It was a surprise deck; she has a few under her belt so there were a few mystery deck. ‘Let fate decide!’ I was indecisive and it called to me.
I opened it and it was the deck I initially looked over, but the more I read it, the more I realized I really vibed with it.
I was looking through each and every card, when I needed to put the deck down for some reason or another. I set it on my thigh. Only a few cards in, the deck slid off my thigh and onto the ground.
Immediately I felt this rush of despair. The cards weren’t ruined, but for a moment I felt like I may as well have dropped them into the water. I think at this point one of the swords cards dropped, while I shuffled them. I think it was like 3 or something. It meant grief and I felt so bad.
So I reorganized the entire deck, took a moment to appreciate each card, and put it back in the box after a confirmation that it felt better and a kiss goodnight.
After a day, I pulled the deck back out. I asked if it was ready to be shuffled. 9 of Pentacles, I took that as a go. I shuffled it, and immediately a card jumped out. Eight of Swords. Okay, clearly she didn’t like it. I asked for clarification. Five of Cups. For some reason, shuffling is difficult. None of the cards are missing, so I think the act of the shuffle is just hurting it. I ask if I need to reorganize, leave it shuffled, or press on with adding reversals. I pulled The Tower.
She might have been telling me to go on, but I just felt bad at that point. I told her she did a good job and put her back. I’ll add reversals tomorrow, if she so chooses.
