Hey there, so I’m a guy who has been seeing another guy. He just came out to me as being a trans guy. I already told him it doesn’t affect how I feel, which it doesn’t. But I want to have a conversation with him about it, but I’m not sure if there are things I shouldn’t ask. If you’d have any advice that’d be great, if not I’d totally understand! All I know is his top surgery is coming up within the next few months
A)It's awesome that you want to talk to him about this
B) 1. How you approach the conversation is entirely based on how much you already know about trans-related stuff
2. His experiences and feelings about trans matters are unique to him and so I guess don't make any assumptions?
If you want to open up the conversation about his experiences and feelings of self, I suggest testing the waters. I'm talkative and open about my experiences with my meat-suit, but some guys may not be.
Examples of how to talk about it?:
"Can I ask you about your transition, and is there anything you don't want to talk about?"
"Are you comfortable talking about trans related matters, [statement reaffirming your genuine interest in who he is as a person here]?"
"I want to support you, therefore I need to understand you better."
Any of these in combination is fine too!
The one thing I gotta say though:
Do Not Vaguely Imply That You Want To Talk About "Something". I would panic on the spot if I came out to somebody and they were like "we should talk". Like?? About what??
Make what you want to talk about clear, and let him know that you're on his team!
Good luck, I hope this helped a little!