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root beer float = anthropocene sea foam

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im taking leaves off trees and dissolving them in whole milk

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watching doctor doolittle

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get this. i sneezed so hard, that my brain flew out ,but it bounced off a wall and went back in. literally my favorite miracle to happen to me, and what a show

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to celebrate the fifa sport soccer i wear shin guards 24/7 at all times like a cast kind of. ancient military holograms try to take them off me as if they ever could

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i am in the fucking tabloids again

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man what of i got a power that makes me get sucked into cyberspace on my computer and had to kill a computer virus every day to live and download food Would you save somebody like me stuck in a PC Would you save me yes or no (no take backs)

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while i was gone i made it so illusions of beautiful spectral women and their boyfriends will stand around me to watch me play riven the sequel to myst when i play it, and theyll even give me hints and say that im doing really great at the game but they say it in my voice

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my big damn cigar. and you know ill smoke it fully

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underwater and laughing

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driving around in the tiniest goddam tank youve ever seen. laughably small tank like the size of a shopping cart (Dillards anyone?). feel pathetic but my daily damage output is increasing on the regular

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got a great opportunity. will be in the next episode of any Tv show youre watching but especially the news

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i am landlocked dear

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im sweeter than a sunflower and taller than a tree and shorter than a mountain. and shorter than a sunflower. get to know me

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i cant hear you my couches squeak so loud. like wupy cushions. can you hear me though