Reflecting Questions, Sept 2017
How do you think you are perceived by others?
At first glance, I feel that I am usually perceived as cheerful, intelligent (or nerdy), and motivated. But my closer friends will know that I’m rather dark and heavy with concepts, often stuck in my thoughts, at times immature and silly, and pretty much a procrastinating machine praying to get things done without actually doing it. My family usually sees me as troublesome, careless and lazy.
Do you feel you act differently depending on who you are with?
I never really knew for sure until I asked various friends; they all told me that I usually act the same everywhere, except with people I really dislike or people who have annoyed me in the past. After hearing this, I began to analyse my actions and realized that in most circumstances I do what I want and don’t really care about what others think, which is probably the reason why I’m the same throughout. To explain my change in personality with those I dislike, I feel that I just don’t want to be fake and act like I like them when I really don’t, so I tend to start avoiding conversations with them and show that I am cold and uninterested.
What are some of your strengths and weaknesses, how have they evolved?
I think one of my strengths is my philosophical thinking and my ability to think of and handle deep concepts. This is also connected to a skill I take pride in, analysis. I generally enjoy analyzing things, and although I did not identify this trait before, when I reflect on my childhood I have always been doing this. Ever since I was little, I loved learning so I would always analyse things that people tell me and situations to figure out what wasn’t right or what an event meant to me. As I grew up, I feel that this skill became more controlled so that I could apply it to my studies.
Recently, my weakness seems to be trusting in others. For example, I always feel that my friends will leave me or ditch me, and that my parents aren’t telling me the truth. When I was little, I didn’t really understand how things worked so I guess my trust in others wasn’t really impacted. But as I got older, I experienced more untruthful events and opinions so I naturally began to doubt people. However, I know that this is unhealthy to do by assuming that people are never genuine. I will try and tell myself not to do so.
Are there key incidences in your life that you have felt shaped who you are?
I am not super fond of answering this question as I don’t feel that any incidences should be labelled as more important than others. I think that every small thing shapes us and often this is even unconscious, so I’d rather not list “key incidences”.
jacobvanloon