–––THE RECKONING. (ap.)

[wrathvs]

i archived this blog half a year ago so the like the...... 60+ people who followed me since then

u can unfollow it’s cool

[wrathvs]

this blog is inactive, dear friends

catch me @hcilstrahl

[wrathvs]

this blog is no more

i’m at @hcilstrahl only now

[wrathvs]

this blog is inactive, dear friends

catch me @hcilstrahl

[wrathvs]

goodbye

it’s been a while. this blog has been prying at my psyche despite my absence, so i’m going to archive it. this blog was a mistake from the start; it has been a massive exercise in self-loathing, a demon on my back, and i pray to god that i’ll have the strength to shake it.

this blog’s existence has sent me spiraling and it needs to go, and i wish it would be so simple as to let the sleeping dog lie. but for the sake of my mental health i need to leave this parting note

i’m @hcilstrahl​. i’m nikki.

i never meant to hide myself like this, i was going to change my alias on hcilstrahl, too, but people treated me so much better when they didn’t know null and nikki were the same person. people who disdained me, openly hated me were trying to be my friend here. people who would never talk to me were seeking me out.

i felt wanted.

it confused and scared and tempted me so i kept the mask on. i had a different name and i was a new person. i finally felt like i could be a loved part of this community after months of isolation. people wanted me around.

my time in the sun on gabe was glorious but the brightest light casts the darkest shadow and my mental health took a turn for the worst. my mercy blog felt so unwanted in comparison and it made me wonder why people wanted me more here. i put so much more work into ang, hardly any into gabe, and it made me get so down. my attitude toward my writing fell into a pronounced depression. i have been incredibly unwell for months and everything loops back to gabe.

i don’t know what the reaction to this news will be. i’m sorry if this news hurts you in any way. but please understand that i’m doing this for myself and to break free of what has been chaining me down first and foremost, but i am still incredibly sorry. more than anything, i expect this to be met with indifference, which is okay, but i need to get this off my chest for closure.

one day i might return to gabe free of this false pretense. but for now, i need to cut the problem off at the head and move on.

i’ll be giving out my main discord to people who still want to chat. if you have questions or anything i’ll be online for a little while.

[wrathvs]

goodbye

it’s been a while. this blog has been prying at my psyche despite my absence, so i’m going to archive it. this blog was a mistake from the start; it has been a massive exercise in self-loathing, a demon on my back, and i pray to god that i’ll have the strength to shake it.

this blog’s existence has sent me spiraling and it needs to go, and i wish it would be so simple as to let the sleeping dog lie. but for the sake of my mental health i need to leave this parting note

i’m @hcilstrahl​. i’m nikki.

i never meant to hide myself like this, i was going to change my alias on hcilstrahl, too, but people treated me so much better when they didn’t know null and nikki were the same person. people who disdained me, openly hated me were trying to be my friend here. people who would never talk to me were seeking me out.

i felt wanted.

it confused and scared and tempted me so i kept the mask on. i had a different name and i was a new person. i finally felt like i could be a loved part of this community after months of isolation. people wanted me around.

my time in the sun on gabe was glorious but the brightest light casts the darkest shadow and my mental health took a turn for the worst. my mercy blog felt so unwanted in comparison and it made me wonder why people wanted me more here. i put so much more work into ang, hardly any into gabe, and it made me get so down. my attitude toward my writing fell into a pronounced depression. i have been incredibly unwell for months and everything loops back to gabe.

i don’t know what the reaction to this news will be. i’m sorry if this news hurts you in any way. but please understand that i’m doing this for myself and to break free of what has been chaining me down first and foremost, but i am still incredibly sorry. more than anything, i expect this to be met with indifference, which is okay, but i need to get this off my chest for closure.

one day i might return to gabe free of this false pretense. but for now, i need to cut the problem off at the head and move on.

i’ll be giving out my main discord to people who still want to chat. if you have questions or anything i’ll be online for a little while.

[wrathvs]

goodbye

it’s been a while. this blog has been prying at my psyche despite my absence, so i’m going to archive it. this blog was a mistake from the start; it has been a massive exercise in self-loathing, a demon on my back, and i pray to god that i’ll have the strength to shake it.

this blog’s existence has sent me spiraling and it needs to go, and i wish it would be so simple as to let the sleeping dog lie. but for the sake of my mental health i need to leave this parting note

i’m @hcilstrahl​. i’m nikki.

i never meant to hide myself like this, i was going to change my alias on hcilstrahl, too, but people treated me so much better when they didn’t know null and nikki were the same person. people who disdained me, openly hated me were trying to be my friend here. people who would never talk to me were seeking me out.

i felt wanted.

it confused and scared and tempted me so i kept the mask on. i had a different name and i was a new person. i finally felt like i could be a loved part of this community after months of isolation. people wanted me around.

my time in the sun on gabe was glorious but the brightest light casts the darkest shadow and my mental health took a turn for the worst. my mercy blog felt so unwanted in comparison and it made me wonder why people wanted me more here. i put so much more work into ang, hardly any into gabe, and it made me get so down. my attitude toward my writing fell into a pronounced depression. i have been incredibly unwell for months and everything loops back to gabe.

i don’t know what the reaction to this news will be. i’m sorry if this news hurts you in any way. but please understand that i’m doing this for myself and to break free of what has been chaining me down first and foremost, but i am still incredibly sorry. more than anything, i expect this to be met with indifference, which is okay, but i need to get this off my chest for closure.

one day i might return to gabe free of this false pretense. but for now, i need to cut the problem off at the head and move on.

i’ll be giving out my main discord to people who still want to chat. if you have questions or anything i’ll be online for a little while.

[wrathvs]

hey

[wrathvs]

@ofdvaa replied to your post: @ofdvaa replied to your post: ...

me, from a distance: LET THEM BE FRIENDS YAAAAA

me, also from a distance: LET THEM

[wrathvs]

@ofdvaa replied to your post: me, arriving 1 minute late for sinday: somebody...

hana gives him alstroemerias; meaning friendship :0

he would give her some pear blossoms in return :0

but he’s kind of a jerk right now

[wrathvs]

me, arriving 1 minute late for sinday: somebody treat gabe RIGHT

[wrathvs]

ADFLICTE.

This is going nowhere. Fine. We’ll take turns bottoming.

You first.

why am i first.

[wrathvs]

ADFLICTE.

Oh, I know exactly how this is going to go. Which is why you need to bend over

you’re bending over. not me.

[wrathvs]

ADFLICTE.

Bend over

pal i don’t think ya understand how this is gonna go

[wrathvs-a-blog]

don’t imagine gabe’s just-woke-up voice. it rumbles from his chest and it’s deep and gravely like rolling thunder. god forbid a significant other is around when he wakes up….. getting his lips pressed to the back of their neck and shoulder, mumbling a g’morning in that VOICE while he curls around them nice and cozy.

yeah, don’t imagine that.

[wrathvs]

@adflicte @diabolgod

im being enbaled

[wrathvs]

stop enabling my thirst guys i’m weak