H.R. GIGER | THE TOURIST IX | 1982

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@writtenmarbles
H.R. GIGER | THE TOURIST IX | 1982
Baphomet: the Tarot of the Underworld (1992) by: H.R Giger
i'm gonna get some people who'll probably bash me for saying this, but i don't think mike is autistic or had adhd. one of his character archetypes is the everyman, which means anyone could see themselves in him. no, this doesn't mean people with adhd (like myself) or people with autism can't identify or relate or headcannon traits about it. it means that he does in fact have traits that make him very understandable and relatable (and, to be fair, everyone has a little bit of everything--these things become diagnosable when a person's life is essentially governed in part by it because their brain is wired much differently than the typical person).
but, personally, i just don't think he actually has either. think about it (i'm sure you have, i'm just trying to make a point), trying to actually diagnose mike with adhd and autism would mean diagnosing him with:
(a) a disorder that would both make him extremely distractible with things he literally cannot force himself to do without physical discomfort or manipulating himself into it and fixate extremely and unerringly on very certain things for long periods of time because it triggers dopamine, before experiencing burnout and physical deterioration
and we haven't actually seen evidence of this, besides maybe DND, but that wasn't so much a hyperfixation as a hobby--moreso tied to his writer ego, and his love of writing has nothing to do with ADHD or Autism, it is simply his thing (like my thing for weightlifting as opposed to my hyperfixation on the entirety of FNAF, or my cousin's thing for yoga but she has neither ADHD nor Autism, she just loves yoga).
also, i beg of you, correct me if i'm wrong. it would be really cool if there was substantial evidence to prove me contrary, because an legitimately adhd- and autism-coded main character that everyone is supposed to be able to relate to would be awesome.
i digress,
and
(b) a learning disorder that renders social situations, communication, and relatability extremely difficult to understand and navigate--because the brain literally cannot process such things the way someone like you or I can. not only that, but a very specific attribute are special interests, and these are interests that fully contribute to shaping the person's identity because, unlike hyperfixations, they are not temporary; they last, what is thought to be, many decades to entire lives, and it starts very young. the way this disorder wires the brain makes it so that forming friendships, communicating in any manner, and processing emotions is an arduous task, with social cues being ambiguous and abrupt situations having the full potential to genuinely ruin a person's day (whereas someone like us would find it easier to self-regulate).
again, we haven't seen much evidence of this. mike handles social situations quite well, and he's able to understand and pinpoint reactions. sure, you could argue that he sucks at communicating, and he literally just stops feeling at some point--but the first is fully because
he's a teenage boy in a borderline-apocalyptic and rather dystopian world where a fucking demon is constantly trying to murder him, his friends, his family, and the entire animal existence while his girlfriend is a super-human who he thinks doesn't need him at all yet cannot give up because he simultaneously believes they need each other (and doesn't realize that can just be platonically, but again, teenage boy, demon, trying to save the world, etc etc).
and the second is almost certaintly because
if the writer's knew what they were doing (#fuckyouduffers), mike would not be any less emotionally expressive than he had been s1-s2, and even a little bit in s3. unfortunately, as it is, the duffers apparently don't know how to consistently write characters. they also don't know how to follow through on their plots and tie everything up nice and tidy. mike's lobotomy is another sickening aspect of the legacy they failed to uphold and honor.
On a related note, I actually think Will would be autistic. His attachment to DND is the most obvious source of evidence for this, since he was the only one who didn't stop doing it for genuinely voluntary reasons (see: trying to change who he is by destroying castle byers (my baby ToT)).
But to be honest, that's the only real source of evidence I have (because it can be argued that had he not been in love with mike and it were another time, maybe he would slowly loosen his grasp on DND. and also, DND could easily be his biggest coping mechanism/anchor in the years after his kidnapping and torture--normalcy is extremely hard to go back to after extreme trauma (PTSD is no fucking joke, this shit sucks, especially in the first few years after the experiences).) I've not got much else to go off of (feel free to share if you agree with my stance, though).
Also, last little thing: it could be that people are trying to cope with mike's sudden personality change in the last few seasons. However, I hope that's not really it, because headcannoning a person who has pretty much no personality or remnant of themself when they were younger as AuDHD is... fairly fucked up.
i've come to terms with the fact that I'm genuinely not cisgender about five minutes ago. i identified as strictly mtf transgender from about 2019-2023, due to an extensive amount of trauma putting me in a mindset that my gender identity could protect me. i realized i didn't strictly want to be male around 2024, but i kept my options open. when i realized, six months after that realization, that exploring the way my brain interpreted my gender in comparison to my sex made me feel rather exhausted--especially because, throughout my entire 2019-2024 journey, such exploration caused an extraordinary amount of strife between me and my family members--i tucked it all away sometime in early 2025. for the last year and nearly-a-half, i have stuck with being cisgender.
it was two weeks ago that i acknowledged my answer to the time-old question, "if you woke up in the opposite sex's body, how would you feel?", was: i wouldn't feel any different. i wouldn't be upset, or uncomfortable. i'd view it the same as i do my female body--beautiful, interesting, strong, deserving. and neutral. always neutral. the only difference was the fact that i'd be a little more comfortable because i wouldn't have breast.
that, of course, was the catalyst just seven minutes ago, now, as i type this out. not that i would see my body the same even if it was male. not that i have a neutral outlook on my female body even now. the fact that i wouldn't have breasts in a male body is what forced me to realize that, no, i'm not cisgender. because, truly, what cisgender woman looks at her body and sees it as neutral. what cisgender person would feel perfectly fine, at home regardless of the sex, if they woke up in the opposite one the next day?
sure, a generalization. but it's fairly accurate.
i do have a question, if anyone reading this cares to answer: is it normal to feel like crying, when you realize you can't pretend as strong or at all anymore?
SPOILER SPOILER SPOILERS!!!
I've seen a lot of other posts talking about how the still lifes are very reminiscent of old AI and it's god-awful attempts to recreate actual people. I am so glad, so very glad, because I thought I'd been high-jacked by AI slop so much that I couldn't unsee uncanny valley and disfigurement any other way. Thankfully, though, the appearance is clearly the point.
With the movie not only being another huge step for the Backrooms community, but also
clear message of how big corp. movies have become an (almost) complete mockery due to cowardice and a lack of originality and
how atrocious the incline of AI usage is (especially with the alarming amount of development and normalizing to accompany it) despite it's frankly subpar and iffy abilities
I'm so fucking ecstatic this movie came out ToT
WELCOME TO THE TADC MLP CIRCUS ‼️🎪
YUHHHH
Clark's voicemail to Mary was so chilling, actually. "I opened the window. I'm not coming back." Something close to that, I believe. I tried to imprint it in my brain as best as possible, especially because it (especially in relation to Mary's traumatic and isolated childhood due to her mother's extreme paranoia and psychosis) sounded like Clark's suicide letter. Which is just... so good.
Poor Mary ToT
Me and the object im trying to pick up while my nail polish is still drying
the good place has crossed my dash and I just thought of a really funny au of conformitygate where Mike keeps on figuring out something is wrong and Vecna just keeps crashing out and resetting the timeline.
“i asked chatgpt” well i asked s5 mike and he didnt say anything he just stood there