I am Xue Zhu of the Y铆nd煤ji脿o Sect. I am an Inner Court disciple by virtue of my birth, as my father was the Sect Leader Bolin Zhu's younger brother. My father passed shortly after my birth, leaving me orphaned as my mother passed during my birth. I do not know their names or faces, as it is against the Sect's custom to speak of the dead. No one has explained it to me, but I believe it is a superstition about the unquiet dead coming after their murderers. After all, the Y铆nd煤ji脿o Sect is made exclusively of murderers.
My Sect, as the name implies, is an assassination focused Sect, with a preference for poisons. Despite my own misgivings towards my career, if one can call it that, I have excelled in learning everything I am taught. From my point of view, one must grab every opportunity to succeed. I will not settle for mediocrity in this life.
In my last life, I was the very definition of mediocre. I worked a minimum wage job, had little to no friends or hobbies, and I made zero impact on the world. I even died in a boring way, suffering a heart attack as a result of my unfit body. This time, I will die either of old age or doing something worthwhile.
Already, through no effort of my own I stand out. My skin is so pale it is almost white and my veins stand out starkly. My hair is ashy blonde and has grown very long, below my waist as it is culturally important to not cut one鈥檚 hair. My eyes are very pale grey with just the hint of green around the edge of my pupil. Honourable Uncle Bolin has informed me I get my coloring from my mother's family.
Thankfully, I am very fit this lifetime. There is no chronic asthma to steal my breath and bind my chest to keep me from exercising. There is no depression to drive me to gorge on unhealthy foods and lie in bed for hours. There is no anemia to slow my limbs and freeze my fingers and pound my heart. Instead, I feel as though energy flows through my veins instead of blood.
I have been learning the martial arts of our Sect since I was old enough to walk. I first started learning the most basic of our styles, the P谩n Sh膿 Style. It is based on the movements and body of a snake. Quick, decisive strikes designed to kill or maim in a single hit. I mastered it enough to move on to the Y膬o Ch贸ng Q煤n Style at seven years old. The Y膬o Ch贸ng style is based on avoiding attacks and fluidity of motion. It reminds me of Aikido, which I always wanted to learn in my past life. The order in which I learned the styles always seemed a little backwards to me, but I am not going to question the Honourable Elders of our clan.
Nowadays, as my tenth birthday approaches, I am looking to learn the poison techniques of our clan. Loathe as I am to use them, the poisons are fascinating. The ability to cause death or worse with a single drop of colourless, odorless liquid is insane.
My tenth birthday this autumn is apparently going to be a big deal, especially sing Honoured Uncle Bolin is unmarried and childless. I am considered the heir of the clan until and unless he names someone else. All the neighbouring Sects have been invited to my birthday. I do not see the appeal in the party the Honoured Elders are planning, especially with plans to potentially betroth me, but I will behave.
As I was performing taolu of the Y膬o Ch贸ng style in our courtyard one summer evening, I felt a shiver run down my spine. It wasn鈥檛 unpleasant, but it felt as though something had changed. Like the wind had abruptly shifted directions. I hurried through my taolu and returned to my room.
My room was similar to the rest of my life at the Y铆nd煤ji脿o Sect. Stark, rigid, lacking in comfort but holding all the necessities. I was considered the heir of our sect, but aside from belonging only to me, my room was more similar to the Outer Disciples' rooms than that of any Inner Disciple. I believed it was because my Honoured Uncle wished to keep me from becoming like the spoiled brats in other Sects. He treated me harshly, keeping me to rigorous standards and giving praise very rarely. Even the Honoured Elders, whose faces tended to sour when dealing with anyone who was below adulthood, were kinder than him.
Honoured Uncle would often complain about Young Masters from other Sects. He would spin tails of their many misdeeds. Through his griping, I had come to learn the flaws of all my peers. The Young Master of the L谩ngsh膩nmen Sect was a gambler and a drinker. The Young Master of the H膿ihu膩b膩ng Sect was a violent womanizer who had been accused of raping several maids. The Young Master of the Y膬nmen Sect had a weak stomach for fighting and covered himself in obscene amounts of jewellery. The Young Mistress of the D奴臎ry菙 Sect was frequently rude and snobby, and had put several restaurants out of business for failing to account for her desires. The Young Mistresses of the Zh煤zhihu膩yu谩n Sect and the L煤w臎ich铆t谩ng Sect were terrible liars and gossips, and entertained themselves by ruining others' reputations. It was the only thing I knew of them as Honoured Uncle kept me hidden inside the Sect and refused to let me leave.
The next morning I still couldn't shake the feeling that something big was going to happen, but I tried to ignore it. I managed to convince L贸ngwei Zhou, one of the Inner Court Disciples to teach me the basics of the K脿n Zh墨zh奴 style. It involves mostly taking advantage of the opponents movements and gaps in their form. He taught me for most of the morning and then left me with a length of ribbon to practice capture techniques.
L贸ngwei was my favourite among the Inner Disciples. He had little care for politics, so he didn't fawn over me as some of the others did. He was also one who believed in bettering the Sect as a whole, so he would give out lessons to anyone who asked at least once. He was very kind at heart, and seemed to dislike our Sect's values as much as I did, though he never spoke of it. He was the grandson of Honoured Elder Minzhe Zhou, who was my favourite of the Honoured Elders as well.
Honoured Elder Minzhe shared many attributes with his grandson. They both carried themselves with dignity and self-assurance in all situations. They were calm and confident, and slow to anger. Honoured Elder Minzhe was often sought out by disciples to mediate conflicts, due to his objectivity and desire to hear all sides before rendering judgement.
Another thing both Inner Disciple L贸ngwei and Honoured Elder Minzhe shared was bright red hair and amber eyes. The colour combination reminded me of a fox, but saying such a thing would be considered insulting here. If I could find a more positive comparison, perhaps a crimson dragon from scrolls I had seen in my past life. Only Honoured Elder Minzhe had the whiskers for it to be true, however.
Both members of the Zhou family walked a fine line in our Sect. For reasons unknown to me, most of the Honoured Elders and Inner Disciples treated them with tolerance bordering disdain. Honoured Uncle especially seemed to hold some mysterious grudge against Honoured Elder Minzhe, and transferred it to L贸ngwei as well.
Politics of our clan tended to be beyond me. The culture and values of the world I have found myself in are too alien for me to have gotten a grip on, and the majority of it seemed to be unspoken and subtle. I could tell who was at odds with who, but such conflicts seemed to change with the wind. The only constancy was Honoured Uncle's dislike of the Zhou family, Honoured Elders dislike of the younger Disciples, and the Inner Court Disciples' snubbing and bullying of the Outer Court Disciples.
Thankfully, as the Young Master of the Y铆nd煤ji脿o Sect, I was mostly immune to bullying. In fact, many of the younger Inner Court Disciples, almost all of the Outer Court Disciples, and all of the servants seemed to hold me in good favor. I couldn't understand why, as I didn't go out of my way to interact with them, and I was never more than polite when I did.
I found the servants of our Sect rather upsetting. Not for their own merits, but rather for the relationship between them and the Sect. The servants were sent from each mortal family once a generation, and lived within the Sect's walls for the rest of their lives, serving our cultivators. They cooked for us, they cleaned for us, they carried our burdens and did anything we asked. In return, they received food and board. To me, it felt more like a semi-polite form of slavery. I kept my mouth shut, however, because despite my status I held no assets or power to help them.
I had complained to L贸ngwei about it once or twice. He had sympathized but seemed uninterested, until I shared the age old advice my previous parents had passed on to me. "Never mess with anyone who handles your health, your wealth, or your food." Of course, the language here meant the exact phrase couldn't translate properly. I had ended up explaining exactly how mistreating the servants could result in death, misery and ruin purely by virtue of our dependence on them. Since our conversation, the servants have been much better treated by L贸ngwei and the Outer Disciples at least.
The rapport between myself and the servants certainly came in handy sometimes. As I was practicing in the courtyard after L贸ngwei left, one of the older servant ladies came to rest in the courtyard with me. Should anyone ask, she was waiting on my word to take my clothes to be laundered after exercise. The truth was that the servants would often hang around me to escape their duties. While they relaxed, they shared gossip with me. I was always grateful for the window into the world outside the Sect's walls.
I paid close attention to the servant while I carried out my new taolu. I had seen her many times, but for the life of me I couldn't remember her name. An unfortunate trait that followed me into my new life.
"There are rumors, Young Master, of some force seeking information. Strangers have been seen in town, asking questions. Odd questions they are, asking about the Lords and Ladies Cultivators that anyone should know. Especially interested in the Young Masters, too."
I paused to consider, balancing on the toes of my left foot. A little wobbly still.
"Perhaps someone is seeking to join hands in marriage?" I proposed to her.
The woman who's name continued to escape me shook her head.
"Not likely Young Master. None of the right questions for that, and asking the wrong sorts anyway. Just asking about birthdays and ages and who their parents are." She stretched out her legs and started rubbing the soles of her feet.
"Might be thinking of Astrology, but not enough questions for that either. And they aren't Cultivators neither, too polite."
The woman was silent for a while. I switched from the taolu to leg strengthening exercises.
"What do you think they were looking for then?"
I saw her make a sudden movement out of the corner of my eye.
"I don't know, but nothing good."
I nodded in agreement and relaxed into a meditation pose.
"I've had a bad feeling since yesterday. It might be good to let your family know to take a trip out of town. Yourself too, if you can."
I could see her shake her head out of the corner of my eye before I closed them.
"You know I can't do that."
I focused on the warm sunlight on my face and evened out my breathing. I could hear her shuffling slightly on the wooden bench. Usually there were birds chirping but they were oddly subdued. It was mildly unnerving.
"Maybe, I could send you and some of the other servants out of town to get something? I'm pretty sure I could arrange for that, to pick up fabrics for my birthday? Honoured Uncle did say I had to put my best foot forward for the Sect."
I heard her shuffle around some more, and a bird landed in the courtyard. The tap-tap-tap of its tiny beak against the stone was soothing.
When she finally spoke, her voice was warm and pleased.
"If the Young Master needs it, we servants must obey."
I nodded slowly, "If you could figure out an appropriate group to pick something out? maybe bring everyone who knows about sewing and silk? And of course some stronger folk to carry it back. Anyone you need, this is a special occasion after all."
Fabric swished about, and then her footsteps sounded against the stone. Bird wings fluttered. At least that way some of them would be safe.
A cold wind blew across the silent courtyard, sliding icy fingers under the edges of my clothes.
---
The days continued on in a similar fashion. I managed to find busywork the servants could reasonably expect to get away with outside of the Sect. The Honoured Elders had been mildly annoyed, but quickly switched to ordering the Outer Disciples to do tasks instead.
Every day, the feeling of something big happenin, some great and terrible change, kept getting worse. I had a constant shiver, and I found myself starting to flinch at sudden noises.
Honoured Elder Minzhe caught me as I was once more going to the courtyard to meditate, the only place that made me feel somewhat safe.
"Greetings, Honoured Elder."
I bowed quickly, feeling a knife edge anxiety trace across my spine as soon as I began to bend.
"Greetings Young Master Xue. I would join you in the courtyard, my grandson says you are learning K脿n Zh墨zh奴."
I was a little surprised L贸ngwei had mentioned me, but naturally I obliged and lead Elder Minzhe to the courtyard.
He seemed a little confused at the twists and turns we took, but he appeared pleased enough when we entered the courtyard.
It was very pretty in the afternoon sun. The sunlight caught on the petals of the flowers I had planted, splashing reds and pinks on the pale walls and painting the Tree of Heaven in flaming hues. The stones were almost perfectly even, as I took the time to regularly reset and brush off any stone which seemed to sit differently than the rest. It was cleaner here than any of the main courtyards as well, with tiny yellow and black birds fluttering about. Most likely because Longwei and I were the only ones who came here, making it easier to clean. Neither of us were the type to scare off birds either.
I stopped Elder Minzhe before he could sit on the bench and pulled out the soft, if lumpy, cushion hidden in a small box beside it. The wooden bench was hard on the older servants' bones, and I was fairly certain he was older than them. After all, cultivation extended not just one's lifespan but also benefitted health and appearance, and the Elder appeared to be in his early sixties to me.
He seemed pleased as he sat on the cushion, "Thank you Xue. Now, I may not be the greatest at K脿n Zh墨zh奴, but I have taught it to many disciples in my time. Demonstrate what you have learned to me."
I nodded gratefully and began to pass through my taolu. It was rare that I had an Honoured Elder supervising my form. Or anyone supervising. Usually I was taught the basics for a few days then left to my own devices.
I ran through my taolu as I had been taught to demonstrate them. As slowly and accurately as possible with smooth motions and then hold each position for thirty seconds before moving to the next. This helped demonstrate weaknesses, awkward movements and incorrect positioning. Honoured Elder Minzhe occasionally hummed and asked me to repeat movements. I eventually ran through all of my taolu.
"I see no flaws in your P谩n Sh膿 or Y膬o Ch贸ng. Your footing in K脿n Zh墨zh奴 is unsteady in the last three stances, but leg exercises and practice will certainly solve that."
I bowed and thanked Elder Minzhe. and immediately went to leg strengthening exercises, pleased I had been able to spot the problem myself. It was a level of self awareness I hadn't had in my previous life. Martial arts of any kind were supposed to be good for that, so the marked improvement made sense.
As I practiced calf raises, a servant arrived in the courtyard. He was one of the few who hadn't taken the opportunities I'd offered to leave the Sect compound for a few days. I thought his name might be Jian or Jiahao, or possibly Zhai. I knew him decently well, even if I couldn鈥檛 recall his name. Other than the eldest servants, he was the most often visitor to my little courtyard.
He stopped at the edge of the courtyard looking nervous. Honoured Elder Minzhe must have been intimidating sitting severely on the bench.
I nodded to him, "Perfect timing as usual. Please bring us a pot of lotus tea, and some bitter melons."
Jian(?) seemed relieved and bowed, before disappearing. It was a popular summer dish here that was easy to make. Hopefully Elder Minzhe would at least appreciate the lotus tea for its health benefits. Its supposed to be beneficial for blood pressure, and being one of the Honourable Elders, especially in his precarious social position, had to be stressful.
We waited in silence for Jiahao to return. I finished my leg exercises, feeling pleasantly sore in a way that signified results and switched to flexibility stretches. It was a sort of modified yoga I half remembered from my previous life added to the more twisty stretches I鈥檇 found in library scrolls.
Finally, Zhai returned with a wide tray. He set it on the small table that I'd dug up a month ago from a dusty storage room and cleaned off. The bitter melons were already plated into two bowls, but the lotus tea was to be prepared in front of us. He'd also included some grass jelly with pitted lychee fruit.
As soon as he had finished preparing and pouring the tea, I spoke up. "Thank you for your conscientiousness, it speaks well of your family how thoroughly you attend to your tasks." I turned to Elder Minzhe, "I would not have thought to bring the jelly out, and he has even remembered my fondness of lychee fruit. It is not an unusual occurrence, of our servants he is one who consistently performs above and beyond expectations."
I caught Jian turning red out of the corner of my eye, but Honoured Elder nodded in agreement.
"Indeed, I have also noticed our Quiang often outperforms his peers. Truly he is deserving of praise and recognition."
I couldn't help a smile from forming, though I quickly covered it with a sip of my tea. I was glad the Elder agreed with me. Everything I said was true, and I didn't often have a chance to praise or thank him for his efforts, especially not to what was effectively his boss' boss. Hopefully this conversation would help him out, just like he frequently helped me out.
Quiang, who's name I had been misremembering, was one of the most helpful people I'd met. Even when he didn't know anyone was watching, he worked hard and finished tasks to a level of detail I greatly admired. It was a rare find, someone who has so much self discipline and high standards for themselves even on things others wouldn't think twice about. It was a principle I tried to live by, to hold oneself to a higher standard and never pass the buck.
Quiang was also the one who had helped me find this courtyard. It was really something I could never repay. Honoured Uncle had forbidden me from training in the courtyard with the other disciples. Apparently it was disheartening to them and damaged their confidence. I couldn't blame then, I wouldn't want to watch the face of our Sect fumble through the basics and fall behind. So this courtyard really became the only place I could truly relax and train, the other option being Honoured Uncle's personal training yard which only himself, myself, and his invited guests had access to.
It wasn't the only way Quiang had helped me either. I'd overheard him talking me up to the servants on many occasions, he helped organize tasks I needed done, he helped me stay out of Honoured Uncle's way, and he'd even gone to collect things from town for me. That's where the lychee fruit had come from even, seeing as Honoured Uncle hated them and so would never allow them in the Sect if he'd known.
Truly, I owed many things to him. Which was part of the reason his determination to stay in spite of my warnings so frustrating. Hopefully, since Elder Minzhe had also seen his worth, I'd be able to convince him to send Quiang on vacation to see his relatives or something.
I had just resolved to bring it up after my next sip of tea when Elder Minzhe began to speak.
"Come to think of it, another area Quiang seems to excel in is being present."
I swallowed roughly, and in the corner of my eye, Quiang paused in his embarrassed fidgeting.
Elder Minzhe took a deliberate sip of his tea, gazing out at birds hopping along the branches of the Tree of Heaven.
"Lately, I've barely seen a single servant inside the Sect walls."
I felt as though an entire block of ice had been dropped down my back as the Elder's gaze swept over to me. I was sure my nervousness was fully visible as I fought to maintain composure.
"You wouldn't happen to have any idea why something so strange is happening, would you Young Master Xue?"
This was terrible. It was also probably the best way this could have come about. It was inevitable that my actions would come to the light. At least Elder Minzhe was a fair person, who would listen to my reasoning before passing judgement. Worst case, he would scold me for my paranoia and recall the servants, then have me serve a situationally appropriate punishment. If it had been Honoured Uncle or Honoured Elder Tao, not only would I be punished, but so would the servants I'd directed. Elder Tao's punishments tended to being cruel and petty at best, and barbaric and inhumane at worst.
I took a deep breath through my nose, then started to explain myself.
"I must apologize for my actions, Honourable Elder Zhou. I have intentionally sent away as many of the Sect's servants as possible so they can not be recalled. Only Quiang has remained, but the others left at my command and should not face any consequence for merely performing as I bid."
Elder Minzhe took another sip of tea slowly and deliberately, and his eyes never left mine.
"And for what reason, Young Master Xue, have you diverted our servants from their duties and forced your fellow disciples to take on the duties of others without consent?"
I winced at his words. I knew the Outer Disciples were currently picking up the slack, and it was unfair of me to drop the extra duties on top of their usually without even saying anything. I had grappled with myself over that one for quite some time, but I'd come to the realization I couldn't tell them. Even unintentionally, they could let slip what was going on and immediately reverse my efforts.
"I sent them away for a few reasons." I hedged, trying to stall for time.
"I... received information that there were suspicious characters in the area. Specifically, that they were... investigating the different Sects in the area. I was told of the questions they were asking, which were very concerning. It seemed to me, like it could be a Sect from outside the Y铆ng菙 Area planning to make an assault on the Sects here. I was concerned that the servants would potentially be hurt or killed during such a conflict, or convinced to be used against us if an enemy took hostages."
Elder Minzhe continued staring stormily at me.
"And why, Young Master Xue, did you not complete your due diligence and inform, say, any other member of our Sect?"
I flushed guiltily at the accusation in his tone. "I... I-I didn't feel I had enough evidence to convince anyone. What I had could be dismissed as rumours, gossip and paranoia."
I swallowed as the memory of the horrible chill briefly overtook me, and my resolve firmed.
"I thought that the chance of saving the lives of those we owe so much of our daily life to was more than worth the inconvenience of unexpected tasks and mild discomforts. If it means I have misstepped and deserved punishment, I will take it, but I stand by my decision."
By the end, I was back to staring him in the eye. What I said was true. I did put the lives of the servants, or of anyone actually, above comfort. I would gladly take punishment if it meant preserving life. The very idea of keeping them here to die just so they could continue serving us was... disgusting.
Elder Minzhe kept staring me down but I refused to bend. Either he would agree my actions were valid, or he'd punish me either himself or at one of the other Honoured Elders' hands. My actions were all I could morally have done, and they could not be undone.
Abruptly he smiled at me.
"It is good to see a member of this Sect who has a spine. Too many of our disciples will bow at the first imagined sign of displeasure, like grass in a windstorm, so desperate not to commit wrongs they commit no rights."
He took a sip of tea and placed it down on the small table.
"While I do not agree with your secrecy which has caused distress and labour for your fellows, I cannot disagree with your actions, or the reasons why you kept them secret."
He looked out across the courtyard. His gaze seemed simultaneously troubled and comforted.
"I, too, have heard these self same rumors. I cannot deny I also have had the same concerns and felt the same ill omens. And you are right, such rumors were dismissed as only gossip. There would have been little to nothing done if you had taken your concerns before Sect Leader Zhu."
He sighed heavily.
"I will not see any of our Sect harmed if possible. Conflict is inevitable, but the level of our enemy is beyond that of any here."
I frowned, "Then you have determined the source of the strangers in town, Honoured Elder?"
He nodded gravely.
"The interlopers are servants of the D艒nghu膩g艒ng Sect. They are the most powerful sect in the Western Mountain Province, wholly composed of female cultivators. Even the lowest of their initiates could defeat most of our Inner Court in a contest of strength. If they are coming to this valley, then our chances of survival are non-existent. And worst of all, our Sect deserves it."
I blinked in confusion, setting my tea aside. How had we upset such a large sect so far away? I could hardly believe they even knew we existed.
"How did the Yindujiao Sect incite the ire of a Sect so far away?" Quiang immediately covered his mouth after realizing he had blurted his question aloud.
Thankfully, Elder Minzhe was in a good mood, and took no offense to his interruption.
"It is not something I can speak of here. Sect Leader Zhu has forbidden the topic within the walls of the Sect. Foolish and willful as he is, even he recognizes he cannot control tongues beyond our walls."
Frustrated, I couldn't help but remark bitterly, "So I will never hear of it, and my life is forfeit for reasons I can never learn."
"Perhaps not."
The Honoured Elder stood abruptly.
"In three days time, I shall have you informed, regardless of what Fate has in store. But, I have much work to do, to protect those of our Sect who cannot protect themselves. Have patience."
Before I could respond, he strode from the courtyard and disappeared.
After a few moments of stunned silence, Quiang and I cleaned up the tea tray. I passed him the untouched bowl of bitter melons, and quickly ate the grass jelly myself. He took the dishes and tray away, and I was left alone in the courtyard with my thoughts.
While the news of our imminent wholesale slaughter was not comforting, I had faced death before and I resolved not to worry about it. Death was an inevitability, regardless of the goal of cultivators being to refute the will of the heavens and achieve immortality. Even the greatest cultivators failed to truly reach their ultimate goal, history was full of cultivators killing each other or dying of tribulations. I had been resigned to mortality in my previous life, and that had not changed in my new one.
More pressing to me was the secret Elder Minzhe had promised to reveal. Even with our deaths approaching, Honoured Uncle was not one to cross lightly. Should he gain wind of the Honoured Elder's plan to contradict his words, the punishment may very well be fatal.
Unless somehow he was going to remove me from the Sect grounds to tell me the secret without breaking Honoured Uncle's edict.
I had been forbidden from leaving the Sect grounds years ago. At the time, it made absolute sense. I was a child, and potentially a high profile target for kidnapping or murder by rival sects. I had never challenged that rule, as I believed Honoured Uncle would eventually allow me to leave when I had proven myself competent enough to defend myself.
Perhaps Elder Minzhe was going to inform Honoured Uncle of the progress I had made today, and I would be allowed to leave when escorted? The other option would be the special chambers for solitary cultivation in the mountains behind our Sect.
There were several chambers hidden throughout the mountains. Even the paths leading to them took a level of skill only Inner Court Disciples were capable of. Once a disciple reached a level of skill where they could not be taught further without attaining a higher level of cultivation, they would begin meditation and individual cultivation. After reaching the last stage of the Meridian Realm, disciples would enter closed door training for weeks or even months on end.
I had yet to reach the stage where I could even withstand the tribulations to reach the chambers, so of course such a thought was ridiculous. Most likely, Elder Minzhe would convince Honoured Uncle to allow me to leave the Sect grounds. I couldn't help but be excited and anxious all at once.
I had of course seen over the walls of the sect occasionally, and the servants had told me of the nearest town, but it was utterly unlike witnessing such things first had. I could hear tales of floating markets and pig farms and farmer fields and merchant houses, but I could hardly imagine what it looked like.
I was distracted until well after sunset, barely capable of completing my own tasks. I couldn't stop thinking of walking among the trees and travelling the roads and being surrounded in the crush of humans again. I even ended up having to meditate before bed for hours just to sleep.
Despite my late bedtime and poor sleep, I woke before the sun as always. In my past life, I'd been a night owl, almost incapable of waking before noon. It had left me feeling permanently exhausted in the daytime, and wired at night. This time around I had forced myself to become a truly early bird. Even if I鈥檇 closed my eyes at a minute before dawn, I would still wake with the sunrise.
I dressed and remade my bed in the soft slate coloured light of the false dawn. I then started a run through of my warm up exercises, designed to stretch and flex every muscle in my body, even the ones in my face. As the light of the sun started to blush the sky pink, I finished my warm up and proceeded to perform the taolu for each of the three forms I knew. By the time the sun had crested the eastern walls, I finished my practising and turned to my ablutions.
Due to our close proximity with the Silver Peak Mountains, the sect had access to both glacier waters and hot springs. I cleaned myself in the freezing waters of the Frozen Tear Lake, a glacier lake that teemed with ice floes in spring and fall, froze over in winter, and flooded its banks on exactly the third day of summer. After bathing in the lake, I found one of the nearby hot springs to relax and warm up in.
Eventually, I felt warm and relaxed, and removed myself from the hot spring. I carefully redressed in clean clothes I had brought with me, and made my way back to the main part of the Sect. As usual, I had returned before breakfast was served, and so my absence was unremarked upon.
After breakfast I entered the sect library. Access was fairly restricted here. I was only actually allowed in the first ten feet of the shelving Everything beyond that was only accessible by the Honoured Elders and of course Honoured Uncle.
Still, the part of the library I could access was very impressive. Shelves of scrolls and notebooks collected by our Sect stretched from floor to ceiling. Many of the scrolls were so old and delicate, one had to call the Librarian, Ning Bao, to unfurl the scroll and read it to you. Every single item in this building was priceless and they kept a strict list of exactly where everything was and who touched it last.
I bowed politely to Librarian Ning Bao, and headed to the aisle I had left off at. Currently, I was embroiled in the works of Philosopher Tao Wen. He delved into the meanings behind cultivating, and the implications of defying heaven. I was about a third of the way through his treatise on the ethical dilemma of limiting knowledge for the safety of the majority. I would have been further in, but all the works of Philosopher Wen were forbidden from leaving the Library.
After two hours of puzzling through Tao Wen's arguments, I checked the book back in with Librarian Bao. As much as I was enjoying reading it, it was admittedly especially relevant to myself in particular.
In this new world where gods and the supernatural were present, and actively interfered with people's lives, I had to think a little more carefully about my personal beliefs. How does one adjust to such a reality? Mostly, I had been taking it one step at a time, trying to read as much philosophy on it as possible. I wanted to know exactly how people justified defying a heavens that could and routinely did strike people down with immeasurable power.
Regardless of my personal spiritual conflict, Tao Wen was a good writer who posed interesting questions and turned potentially dry material into something interesting. If I had the chance, I think I'd like to speak to him. If he spoke anything at all like how he wrote, any conversation with him was sure to be both enjoyable and informational.
After reading in the Library, I moved on to my other non physical task, writing. Specifically, writing poetry. There was a large culture of reading and writing poetry, completely unlike my previous life. It was a little nerve-wracking every time I wrote, as I would then have to show it to one of my peers to be critiqued.
Getting the hang of the cultural style of poetry took time to get the hang of. My first few poems had been rejected as strange, amateurish and nonsensical with poor structure. I'd had to read lots of poetry and make many attempts just to be tolerable. My tongue may have spoken the same language as those around me, but I still thought in the same grammatical structure of my past life.
Today was a structured poem for my birthday party. The topics were already pre-selected, and I had a good idea of what I wanted to put down. I had several samples of other birthday poems in front of me to reference while I worked. I'd been working on them for a few days to make sure they went exactly right, and as soon as the poems were done, I'd be painting them on large wall scrolls for the celebration.
I struggled for some hours to write exactly what I meant with the correct characters. Tomorrow, I would proofread what I had written today and make any changes. Once I was confident with what I had written, I would be handing it over to the Honoured Elders so they could confirm it was of good enough quality for the party. Progress was slow, but steady, and I had to take several breaks to clear my mind when I struggled with wording.
Afterwards I returned to the courtyard and ran through my taolu. I eventually managed to progress with my capture techniques to being able to snatch a flower petal from between the cracks in the stones. It was good progress, even though there was still much for me to learn.
After the sun started to set, I headed to the dining hall to collect my dinner. I politely made small talk with anyone who talked to me. A few of the Outer Court Disciples asked me to mediate a dispute for them. I think I did okay, as no one tried to correct me. It ended with both parties relatively pleased with their results. Unfortunately, by the time I was finished with them my dinner had gone cold.
Even cold, generally the meals served at my sect are decent. Warm, they were delicious and filling. Frequently, I found myself occupied with other matters near dinnertime. After the third time the kitchen had to remake my meal due to my own lateness, I鈥檇 requested they keep my meals to things which could be eaten cold. It was far too embarrassing to have them send for a new meal, or worse wait to serve me after everyone else. It was bad enough that I took my meals away from everyone else, making them bring food to me separately.
Similarly to practicing my taolu, Honoured Uncle had informed me to eat my meals alone as well. Mealtimes were separated by status in our Sect. Honoured Uncle ate with the Honoured Elders, separate from the Inner Disciples, who ate separately from the Outer Disciples. Of course, the servants ate among themselves at the times they chose, so long as it didn鈥檛 interfere with their duties. It was only due to my frequent tardiness that I ate entirely by myself.
After eating quickly and hopefully neatly, although I unfortunately had no one to compare my manners to, I carried my plate to the glacier waters. I always cleaned my dishes in the glacier water before returning them to the kitchen. The hot springs would have been preferable, but we would have ended up bathing in rancid soup as they had no exit stream. The icy waters of Frozen Tear Lake flowed cleanly away from our Sect in the Melancholy Azure River, and there were enough fish in the mountain streams to take care of any food waste before it reached town. Washing dishes in the icy waters was still unpleasant enough I wouldn鈥檛 put extra work on the servants backs.
The kitchens were full of Outer Disciples, as the servants had mostly disappeared as I鈥檇 set them to. They splashed each other and laughed quietly in the warm room. Despite myself, I couldn鈥檛 help smiling as I heard someone make a rather mean but accurate impression of Honoured Elder Li煤 snoring.
I snuck in and left my dishes by the stack of dirty dishes, careful not to be noticed. If the Disciples noticed me, they would have to stop working and bow, and politely offer to do tasks for me. I would rather secretly listen to them joke to each other than have them awkwardly try to serve me. Especially since they would be wondering if I would give them trouble for what they spoke of privately between themselves.
Leaving them to their chores, I quickly made my way back to my rooms. Morning would come sooner than anyone liked, and I was most likely in for another restless evening.
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