Hi.

[wspauline]

MOVING OUT NEXT WEEK BABY 🙌

so overwhelmed, so ridiculously excited.... i can't wait to live with isaac. cheers to one more goal checked off my list for 2021!

[wspauline]

major heart eyes <3

[wspauline]

i could just brag for hours about how i good i have it

[wspauline]

life is so beautiful.

[wspauline]

it's weird looking at old posts and remembering what i was going through at that point in my life, especially when it's so different compared to where i'm at currently. i think it's been the most rewarding either seeing i've accomplished more than i accounted for or the fact things have gone better than expected.

it's also weird thinking that in another year or so i'll hopefully be in a position i've constantly longed for. i've almost always had a plan for my future or at least a good idea in which has changed very little since my last deep reflection. this time around.. i just have an oddly good feeling about what's in store. as long as i stay focused on my goals everything will fall into place.

everyday i'm reminded to strive towards setting myself up for success and i can't wait for the day i get to look back and finally say i did it.

side note: i would like to add that the addition of isaac in my life has been such a positive impact and what a beautiful thing this has unexpectedly become thus far.

[tokyorell]

I’m your puppet, you control me

[thesuncameouttoplay]

[mad-misa]

[caffedinotte-deactivated2018020]

skate and die.

[silly-style]

[wspauline]

i’ve done fairly well growing as a person who tries to see the light in most situations. it’s been most challenging these last couple of weeks and the stress has taken an obvious toll on me. i’m so mentally and emotionally exhausted. my energy is running out but i no longer have a choice but to accept it at this point.

i don’t even know what to say half the time. it’s hard venting. it almost makes me feel worse. my psychologist says it will take time. but i’m unsure if i’ll ever get over this. i’m at a point in my life where the types of opportunities that are currently presenting themselves to me may only be a one time thing. i’m not guaranteed another chance. i’m getting older and i need to really get the ball rolling on my future. there’s no specific time frame but i do have a plan.. a plan that requires a very strict work ethic that seems almost impossible given where i stand with my family (and bank account).

my goals seem unattainable right now but i think i’ll get there eventually. somebody please pray for me because i’m losing hope.

[wspauline]

honestly though i really don’t remember the last time my feelings were this hurt. i hate myself.

[wspauline]

i deserve better.

i have so much potential.

[wspauline]

i’ve been crying all day. so overwhelmed..

this is the most bittersweet feeling i’ve experienced thus far.

[jigglypuffsvevo]

me: tries my darndest

me: isn’t worth a darn

[valtsv]

character in a fight scene: *restrains their opponent by pinning them against the wall by their wrists*

me:

[icantwritegood]

character in a fight scene: *pins their opponent down by straddling their waist and holding their wrists to the floor*

me:

[ladylike-foxes]

character in a fight scene: *lifting their disarmed opponent’s chin slightly with the business end of their weapon*

me:

[g3ncyho3]

character in fight scene: *pins down the opponent and leans in close to whisper in their ear*

me:

[wspauline]

i’m tired of being right.

with how pesimistic i am in regards to myself and most things around me, it’d be nice to be proven wrong.

life is beautiful and i have so much to be grateful for yet here i am continuing to feel passive aggressive and unsatisfied.

i need a break. i don’t have the energy to keep this up and i hate myself for using whatever energy i have left to fake it.

i want to care but i don’t.

[konoko]