“It’s all about it, Winnie the Pooh. It’s how I’ve gotten away with so many murders, duh. No one can touch this kind of confidence. Oh yeah, the Civil War? I knew I spotted you in those reenactments. Knickers look really good on you, keep ‘em. Wait, is this a true fact? Holy shit. I didn’t know that. That fucker’s money is probably somewhere at the bottom of the river. I’m gonna get my scuba gear and spend the rest of my years looking for this shit, especially if our bootleg private practice goes under.”
“See, I told you. You have a cute face though, so any pair of glasses would’ve worked. And don’t argue with me over that because I have seen your face and I know, lady. Look, I’m open minded. If there’s alcohol involved, I’ll go anywhere. There’s alcohol at drag shows, right? I can bring a flask. I’m always prepared. Yes! How have you not seen it? It’s about this group of tourists that visit Chernobyl for the day and they end up getting stranded there and all of the creepy mutants come out at night and eat them. Or something like that. I’ll watch it with you. Fuck that noise. I hope none of them have procreated because they’d have some Joseph Merrick looking spawn. Yikes.”
“Eugh. Don’t call me that. Any confidence can be broken, if you just try hard enough. It’s like a game, ‘how far can you go to break someone’s self esteem?’ Mostly only fun for sociopaths, however, if you really hate someone, sometimes it’s fun with that, too. They’d be bloomers, technically, and God, were they itchy. I do have a pair in my drawer, though, sometimes I miss it. Yeah. At the end of his life, he was a syphilitic potato. He also told nobody where he hid it, so yeah, there’s just a bunch of riches unaccounted for. My money is somewhere near his home. Road trip to Chicago?”
“I have a cute face? Why, thank you. You ain’t so bad yourself-- though, I will always be the cutest. And that’s not true. Some glasses just don’t suit people’s faces. I hate those wire rimmed ones because any time I’ve ever had them I’d accidentally snap them. They’re weak. Oh, honey, alcohol is a must at drag shows. It’s fucking amazing, to be completely honest. What the actual fuck, I need to watch that movie now. Sounds so bad, but so good. No, what? They’re like elderly. It’s actually really interesting, to be honest. They wouldn’t move because Chernobyl is their home, and where they lived their whole lives-- so they simply stayed. It’s all about how they are protecting their bloodline, and how homeland is tied into genetics, and some more fun things. You should check it out.”
