From the inside of my mind...

A corner of the web to share my photography and other creations <3

[xenondestruction]

Memory Shards

And I pick up the pieces unable to see the painting in its entirety

Like scattered gems holding onto snippets of clues

Zoning out of reality and embodying someone that I think is me

Tearing myself apart and starting over when I cant see me

Inhaling and exhaling the clouds of lavender and rose smoke

For at one point it was traded for the cold breeze of tobacco and loss of hope

Scattering the ashes as if it were a wake

While every night I'd lay awake wondering why I can remember everything

But yet I seem to feel as if my life is a thousand miles away

______________________

As I clear the fog from my mental health, I am beginning to feel better and expressing myself more through writing. This poem is about my struggles with CPTSD and depersonalization.

xxenon_destructionxx

[geyashvecova]

Design graphics Geya Shvecova (Laid-back in secret) Archive 210326

[the-beard-of-edward-teach]

Hawaiʻi is currently in the midst of a natural disaster if you didnt know

Apparently there isn’t much news coverage of this outside of the islands

Towns are flooded, homes destroyed and collapsed, roads collapsed, lives at risk, gas leaks from the flood damage

Haleiwa and Waialua are currently evacuated because the 120 year old dam is at risk of bursting

Mind you that damn is owned by Dole. Theyve known about it needing to be fixed for years and years and years. Despite having more than enough money they refuse

The state has been trying to buy it out from them for years so they can fix it, but the sale hasn’t gone through

Keep in mind that the Dole family were the ones who illegally imprisoned Queen Liliuʻokalani and illegally overthrew the monarchy.

If I see another goddamn person say how sad this is for the tourists whose “trips were ruined” and compare a messed up vacation to people losing their homes, belongings, and livelihoods, I’m going to lose my mind

I am so lucky that my family or friend’s are safe and the few whose houses flooded didnt have it too bad, but so so so many were not as fortunate

If you haven’t heard anything about this until now, I suggest looking into it

The sirens didn’t go off until the flood had been going on for hours. Our state government is spending so much money on a fucking monorail we don’t need rather than fixing the infrastructure.

It’s been the locals and Kanaka doing the most to help get people to safety from the start

I don’t really know how to end this

I just need to know people are aware

I need to know people are seeing whats happening

[xenondestruction]

We are all human and we need so much support during these trying times. I know we all can do what we can in our capacity such as spreading awareness of the situation.

[xenondestruction]

Getting out of my head and into real world instead these days...sunshine helps ☀️

[willgrahamscock]

KILL AI AND REBLOG AND CREATE ART IN 2026

[xenondestruction]

2026 Resolution

[xenondestruction]

Unknown

I would have been growing. I would have been gentle.

I would have been flowing.

Being more afraid to use the pen when my voice could not reach.

Continued to write when I felt my voice lost prevented letting the betrayal sink in. Its sadly made me who I am today.

Watching the circuit board rewire itself. Losing my persona, becoming wild and untamed instead of skilled and masterful.

It isn't too late for me.

She's still hiding under pen and ink stains.

Navigating a world that no longer respects analog input and instead honors the cold digital scowl of A.I 2.0.

I've been programed with malware. But I pray it releases me soon.

Untangling wires from my veins.

Learning how to breathe once again without LCD or was it LSD? I cant remember the difference between the two.

Who hurt you? There was just you.

She's not done yet. She's just choking.

Regurgitating her own blood.

She's alive again.

Her wings bent, but free.

______

I haven't written for many years and am slowly getting back into it. I hope to share more of my writing soon <3

-xxenondestructionxx

[xenondestruction]

I try not to every day

[xenondestruction]

Welcome to the Palace

[the-clown-crypt]

It’s Black Friday ootd

https://youtu.be/Q9LVdClG74w

[xenondestruction]

Its the textures for me

[xenondestruction]

No Vacancy

[xenondestruction]

Palm trees, no breeze

[snakes-stims]

at the end of the rainbow

[xenondestruction]

I wan to eat it!!!!

[xenondestruction]

Life's a party

[xenondestruction]

It was a great show

[xenondestruction]

Postcard from home

[xenondestruction]

The sky is melting...

[xenondestruction]

Fifth Generation

It's amazing how much we perceive from a snapshot of someone's life. We say hello, have a brief phone conversation (if any) or just send a quick text of howdy do and go about or way. We nod and say thank you to the cashier at our local grocery store. We send an email once in a while to inquire about customer service, and we spend time idly scrolling through the gram ( or what ever your vice is ). Eventually time fades, we repeat the same cycle of activities over and over and don't even hesitate to question where our next fill will come in. Our next hookup, the next new trendy set of clothes we will wear, the next piece of gossip or drama we will listen to at work or maybe even share.

Static begins to buzz in our ears as we notice we're wired to a program. Our eyes barely light up when our dog comes to greet us a at the door. We just grab the leash and walk because it's what is expected. We don't even make eye contact with the food deliver app's driver, because we're already clicking on rate my delivery. We mumble thank you ( if some of us even do ) take the food and go. We pretend to immerse ourselves in conversation but it begins to sound muffled as we notice its the same story arch of "They broke up with me so I went clubbing last night and got drunk - "

Our features fade, we have less and less to contribute to conversations, flipping through videos becomes the activity of the day. We no longer consume the content. We no longer digest information. We no longer process and have our own thoughts. We no longer display emotion. We don't even lose signal. We don't even unplug. This is how we stay connected now. A mess of wires and radio frequencies and the irony of this being displayed on your screen. We are fifth generation.