xeyra

a lonely soul

[xeyras-space]

"I'm tired."

How many times have I muttered those words under my breath?

A hundred? Two hundred? A thousand times?

I wonder if those words have a consciousness of their own—if they realize why I keep repeating them.

I speak them like a mantra.

I'm tired...

I'm tired...

I'm tired...

How long will it take before I no longer have to say them?

I'm tired...

I'm tired...

I'm tired...

Will this wish ever be granted, or will it simply perish?

Will I one day forget these words, or will they remain branded into my soul, my mind, and my conscience?

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

PROTECT NASHVILLE ZOO: NO TO AI DATA CENTER

Greetings everyone!

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Nashville Zoo Says No to Proposed Data Center

You support really matters 💜

[xeyras-space]

My body is a political ground,

debated in rooms I've never entered,

governed by voices I've never heard,

claimed by people I've never known.

To them, it's policy.

To me, it's my autonomy.

And while they rule over my existence,

I am the one who must carry the consequences.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

Bellyache

They’re looking again.

I can feel it

their eyes scraping my skin,

peeling me open

until all that’s left

is the sound of my breathing

and the ache twisting in my gut.

I clutch my stomach,

pretend I’m fine,

but whispers sound like my name,

and every laugh

cuts like glass

across my ribs.

Don’t look at me.

Please. Don’t.

Your silence hums in my ears,

like insects nesting behind my ribs.

Your gaze burns,

and I can’t tell if it’s real anymore.

I want to vanish

sink into the floor,

curl into a bruise,

become nothing

so your eyes will finally look away.

But I can’t.

I’m trapped inside this body,

this trembling, sweating, nauseous shell

who can’t stand the weight of being seen.

My belly aches again.

It’s not hunger.

It’s fear

raw, endless,

alive beneath my skin.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

Head empty, no thoughts, just pure void.

It just grow stronger and worser, the poison in my mind, it has its own life, its living in my mind.

I can't take it anymore, I tried reaching out for help but it didn't reach out my hand, instead it left there hanging.

My mind, my soul, screaming from the emptiness that I feel, no one mind, no one listened, no one dare.

It's just me and my poisonous 'thoughts' that keeps make me want to hit my head on wall.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

I'll die as your daughter but never live as one.

-Xeyra

[xeyras-space]

I'm full of Impure thoughts—

Thoughts that don't belong to me, but to others.

They creep endlessly into my mind.

They're like dirt, and I am the vessel—

Slowly, silently, filling with what isn't mine.

They leave me feeling corrupted,

disgusted with myself.

Which they shape me into who I am.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

You carry storms behind your serene eyes,

But still, you smile—

A soft defiance

A light refusing to dim.

You're not the sun,

not the stars that vanish at dawn—

You're a street lamp in the night,

Burning gently for the lost.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

I must find a way,

A way to free from the yoke of my opressor,

For if i don't, how will i be free?

And if i do, will it be the end?

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

I'm a husk, hollow and incomplete.

A parasite craving a host to survive,

I feed on your warmth,

but when you pull away,

It feels like my very being is torn apart,

left to drift in the echoes of silence,

haunted by fear,

that without you, I am nothing.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

If in your death you turn into a flower,

I'll gather your petals,

preserve your essence,

and plant you in my sacred garden,

where each bloom reminds me of you,

eternally intwined to me,

a vivid reminder of love that goes beyond death.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

They wanted me to be tough as stone—

Strong, emotionless.

But I'm not a rock.

I'm a glass, fragile and delicate,

Reflecting light, shattering easily.

They say glass won't survive in this world,

that only rocks endure.

But rocks break too,

Cracking under pressure,

And while they seem tough and strong,

Their strength is not forever.

In a world that tarnishes and crushes,

I choose to be glass—

Fragile, delicate, yet resilient,

But never a rock.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

I always believed I excelled

at everything i touched—

self doubt buried beneath quiet pride.

But one day, It cracked, the illusion shattered.

All I'd hidden came rushing back,

a tide of doubts,

seeping in like poison,

clouding my mind,

leaving me unsure

of everything I thought I knew.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

Tears streaming down like never-ending falls, but no sadness within my heart's walls. Emotions unfelt, unheeded, caught in a torment of emptiness and knelt.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

My eyes, they weep without end,

Just like my heart, eternally bleeding away.

Pain, an endless, aching torment,

That tears my soul into unending fray.

Tears flow, staining my cheeks red,

While my heart, once full, now lies shattered and dead.

xeyra

[xeyras-space]

I've become a person I used to disdain,

No longer my old self, but someone else slain.

Inactions and thoughts I cannot condone,

A stranger in my own skin, my old self abandoned.

I ache for the past, where my truth unfurled,

As I stumble tangled in my plight, The more I loathe the new me in the endless night.

-xeyra

[xeyras-space]

Everytime i gaze at the mirror, a peculiar creature appears.

A visage so familiar, yet it bears an eerie glare.

Ugly, grosteque, reviled, repulsive.

These words perfectly describe of what i saw.

But i realized, it's my own reflection i saw, and no one else.

-xeyra