Scarlett

24/buckynat/Scorpio

[igayorhm]

Hello sir. You are looking dangerously attractive right now. 

[oldergod-deactivated20191130]

it looks like edward is trying not to sneeze and they’re shouting random words at him to help it go away 

[hatussy]

psa: any large gatherings will result in a further spread of the virus. 🎇 happy fourth 🎆

[savannahsdrabbles]

It’s always my favorite character

[feyrealms]

I agree john mulaney is probably an immortal akin to beings such as keanu reeves and jeff goldblum but he’s like a new born baby immortal who is looking at the long long expanse of a lifetime he has in front of him and is already tired

[newtgeiszler]

jeff golblum is thousands of years old and loving it. john mulaney was born in 1901 and ever since 1924 it’s gone downhill for him

[wombatking]

So to be clear, the immortal timeline seems to be:

John Mulaney - early 20th century

Eric Andre - Probably 17th century or so.

Taika Waititi - Elizabethan age, probably hung out with Shakespeare

Keanu Reeves - We think sometime around Alexander the Great, but he seems to have just sprung up fully formed.

Jeff Goldblum - 100% Biblical times, may or may not be King Solomon.

Tommy Wiseau - Indeterminate, may be the first Homo Sapiens.

[strangehorse]

this is david lynch erasure

[hubblegleeflower]

Who are the female immortals?

[artisanbloodbank]

Jenny Slate - Jazz Age Darling, bffs with Alice Roosevelt

Helena Bonham Carter - Refused an invitation to dine with Queen Victoria based on her treatment of the Irish

Lucy Liu - ran away from home to join Ching Shih, 19th century Pirate Queen’s crew. Was considered too soft for fighting and was given an accordion

Bjork - 14th century Icelandic healer accused of witchcraft, also possibly a selkie

Whoopie Goldberg - present during the Conquest of Constantinople but don’t bring it up around her, it’s too fresh in her mind

Tilda Swinton - found sleeping in a peat bog. Carbon dating inconclusive

[tamjador-deactivated20231120]

this is blatant cher erasure

[aces-and-anime]

Cher isn’t immortal - she can just turn back time

[tracing-rivers]

Are we forgetting that Anne Hathaway was very openly married to Shakespeare?

[valtsv]

[indigobrea]

Has anyone else seen this yet??

[incorrect-gifs]

I miss assassin couple (x)

[whitepeopletwitter]

[obsessedwithfictionalmen01]

If this isn’t the face of a man who is about to stab his brother for the 178383848th time then I don’t know what it is

[bassiter]

while looking up 1950s slang, i found the phrase “come on snake, let’s rattle,” which has 2 meanings: asking someone to dance, and challenging someone to a fight

and. hhhooooooooo boy does that fact have some Potential

[steampunkepsilon]

Invite your crush to the dance floor, but instead they just fuckin deck you

[fysebastianstan]

sebastian via istagram stories (may 9th, 2020)

[everythingfox]

“Sheep discovers how to use a trampoline”

(via)

[comparingmeerkats]

[tempestaurora]

sebastian stan playing christmas music and yelling "2021!" and just skipping the rest of 2020 is a whole mood and that is the kind of energy I'm gonna bring to 2021, merry christmas everybody

[mjalti]

daddy issues make u a people pleaser but mommy issues make u like. a sociopath

[kakyoiin]

[tikkety-tok]

[emi--rose]

No one could have possibly predicted this