xthepenguin

just a silly guy :3 18+

[xthepenguin]

[redstonedust]

phenomenom thats been bothering me that i could only express via an mspaint reverse boomer comic

[emolgana]

incredible stuff happening out there

[pukicho]

There's gotta be someone more qualified. I'm fucking begging you.

[egberts]

hey guys is there a nice wizard on tumblr or is it only the evil one

[evilwizard]

it’s just me

[ahno-nimus]

it's a common misconception that five plus eight is thirteen. actually five plus eight equals the skull

[evilwizard]

SCARY MATH works in a whole different way that scientists don’t understand yet

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

one thing I respect the hell out of is little kids lying down on the floor in public. they have had ENOUGH and are ready to go HOME and are willing to be a HUGE INCONVENIENCE about it. we can learn so much from them

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

still thinking about how much WORSE running errands is for kids. they aren't even your errands! sure it sucks for adults, but kids are 1) forced to tag along, 2) no personal investment in the outcome, 3) get no say on location, duration, timing. a kid stuck in a grocery store aisle while their parent gossips with an acquaintance is a Hostage Situation. at the bare minimum hostages should be allowed to lie down and get some rest

[penpaladinjules]

My oldest kid was especially intolerant of extra bullshit during errands. He wanted a list of where we were going, and would get irate about new ones being added to the list after we started. He called this rule “No Secret Trips,” with special contempt reserved for the bank.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i think your kid should be put in charge of a major government agency. i want him ruling the FDIC with an iron fist. i want him usurping total control over the Department Of Motor Vehicles

[pukicho]

If I wasn’t so sleepy you’d all be soo fucked

[noobkiller2009]

Just sleep

[pukicho]

There’s no fucking way that works

[evilwizard]

I’M RIGHT BEHIND YOU

[cowboybarbaryn]

Thank you Evil Wizard, it’s good to know someone has our backs

[evilwizard]

IN A SCARY WAY

[queenofskys5]

Thank you Evil Wizard, finally someone to scare away the creeps!

[evilwizard]

I FEEL LIKE WE NEED TO WORK ON OUR COMMUNICATION

[twilightofthesandwiches]

Hey! Spin this wheel of Every Pokémon!

This is now your Pokémon Partner. Whatever you would want to do in the Pokémon world, your Result goes with you. It would be your Ace in Battles and/or contests or they might just help you around with your regular Not-Inherently-Pokémon Job or just hang around your house as your beloved Pet. If you really really want to BE a Pokémon than this is the Pokémon you just turned into.

How are you feeling about it?

HELL YEAH!! THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE POKEMON!!

OH!! I LOVE THIS POKEMON!!

Yeah, this Pokemon is great!!!

This Pokemon is good!!

This Pokemon is nice, but nothing more

...I mean, it could be better

This Pokemon is okay…

I have mixed feelings about this Pokemon…

Not bad, but I’m still kinda disappointed…

Well… it could be worse?

I mean, at least it’s better than NOT having a Pokemon, right?

OH NO THIS IS ACTUALLY WORSE!!

Voting ended onApr 3

[jurisffiction]

"? No" is such a foundational linguistic construction to my psyche. a hieroglyph. it should be a standard emoji

[goatedgreen]

i love this image because not only is it accurate but also every time i see it i subconsciously scan the image to make sure its not somewhere i know. because everywhere in england looks like this. could be literally anywhere.

[snoozysniff]

So many characters who's designs could have been a billion times better if the creator had the balls to not make them skinny and white

[parakeet]

#MyCoin

[rumade]

I’d divorce him too lmao

[sustainableseparatists]

[sisyphereantask]

It’s never JUST about the tomatoes.

[probablyasocialecologist]

Basically!

Throughout the day, partners would make requests for connection, what Gottman calls “bids.” For example, say that the husband is a bird enthusiast and notices a goldfinch fly across the yard. He might say to his wife, “Look at that beautiful bird outside!” He’s not just commenting on the bird here: He’s requesting a response from his wife—a sign of interest or support—hoping they’ll connect, however momentarily, over the bird.

The wife now has a choice. She can respond by either “turning toward” or “turning away” from her husband, as Gottman puts it. Though the bird-bid might seem minor and silly, it can actually reveal a lot about the health of the relationship. The husband thought the bird was important enough to bring it up in conversation and the question is whether his wife recognizes and respects that.

These bidding interactions had profound effects on marital well-being. Couples who had divorced after a six-year follow-up had “turn-toward bids” 33 percent of the time. Only three in 10 of their bids for emotional connection were met with intimacy. The couples who were still together after six years had “turn-toward bids” 87 percent of the time. Nine times out of 10, they were meeting their partner’s emotional needs.

The Secret to Love Is Just Kindness

Those who showed genuine interest in their partner’s joys were more likely to be together.

[educatedsavage]

Damn, this made me think of all the “shouting into the void” social media posts everyone makes. Just bids for connection. From ANYONE.

[c-ptsdrecovery]

I think that is ABSOLUTELY what a lot of that is. Our culture is very isolated (even BEFORE covid!), and we’re desperate to connect with others. I read an article one time that suggested that childcare workers stop saying that a child is “Just wants attention” and start saying that the child is “looking for connection.” We’re starved for it even from childhood.

[seymour-butz-stuff]

[sosayset]

When they are speaking about a passion, respond to children as if you would a tenured professor at a prestigious university, and to an adult as if you would a child free of the burdens of adulthood. 

Children are desperate to teach the wonders of the world that they know, that they have just learned, and share it with anyone interested.  Adults pour passion they didn’t know they had into voluntary obligations, and crave a simple acknowledgment of that passion as being worthy and valid. 

“Dear third grader, tell me exactly why you chose <x> as you third favorite carnivorous dinosaur instead of second, as specifically as possible.”

“Hey neighbor, your vegetable garden is absolutely gorgeous this year…and no I’m not just saying that because the tomatoes you gave me last year were absolute perfection.”

[salmonandsoup]

And if you can’t respond to the emotional bid at that moment, let them know you heard them. If there’s a gorgeous bird outside, ask your loved one to take a picture so you can share in it together. But by god, hear them. Tell them they were listened to.

[doomhamster]

That *is* a response though! Telling someone “I’m busy/low on energy right this moment, but if it’s possible, I’d love for you to show me this thing later” works just fine. At least so long as you establish a pattern of actually following up on it, even if it’s just going “hey, wasn’t there a thing you wanted to show me? a bird?”

Most people hate being told “later”, but that’s just because most people who say “later” really mean “I can’t be bothered”.

[learningtogirl]

Yeah. This. I have run into this a lot. It’s what kills me about having many friend groups I’m kind of in, but no one I’m properly close to.

Idk why I’m rambling about this especially after such a long post this one is never gonna be read…

[rumade]

I’d divorce him too lmao

[sustainableseparatists]

[sisyphereantask]

It’s never JUST about the tomatoes.

[probablyasocialecologist]

Basically!

Throughout the day, partners would make requests for connection, what Gottman calls “bids.” For example, say that the husband is a bird enthusiast and notices a goldfinch fly across the yard. He might say to his wife, “Look at that beautiful bird outside!” He’s not just commenting on the bird here: He’s requesting a response from his wife—a sign of interest or support—hoping they’ll connect, however momentarily, over the bird.

The wife now has a choice. She can respond by either “turning toward” or “turning away” from her husband, as Gottman puts it. Though the bird-bid might seem minor and silly, it can actually reveal a lot about the health of the relationship. The husband thought the bird was important enough to bring it up in conversation and the question is whether his wife recognizes and respects that.

These bidding interactions had profound effects on marital well-being. Couples who had divorced after a six-year follow-up had “turn-toward bids” 33 percent of the time. Only three in 10 of their bids for emotional connection were met with intimacy. The couples who were still together after six years had “turn-toward bids” 87 percent of the time. Nine times out of 10, they were meeting their partner’s emotional needs.

The Secret to Love Is Just Kindness

Those who showed genuine interest in their partner’s joys were more likely to be together.

[educatedsavage]

Damn, this made me think of all the “shouting into the void” social media posts everyone makes. Just bids for connection. From ANYONE.

[c-ptsdrecovery]

I think that is ABSOLUTELY what a lot of that is. Our culture is very isolated (even BEFORE covid!), and we’re desperate to connect with others. I read an article one time that suggested that childcare workers stop saying that a child is “Just wants attention” and start saying that the child is “looking for connection.” We’re starved for it even from childhood.

[seymour-butz-stuff]

[sosayset]

When they are speaking about a passion, respond to children as if you would a tenured professor at a prestigious university, and to an adult as if you would a child free of the burdens of adulthood. 

Children are desperate to teach the wonders of the world that they know, that they have just learned, and share it with anyone interested.  Adults pour passion they didn’t know they had into voluntary obligations, and crave a simple acknowledgment of that passion as being worthy and valid. 

“Dear third grader, tell me exactly why you chose <x> as you third favorite carnivorous dinosaur instead of second, as specifically as possible.”

“Hey neighbor, your vegetable garden is absolutely gorgeous this year…and no I’m not just saying that because the tomatoes you gave me last year were absolute perfection.”

[salmonandsoup]

And if you can’t respond to the emotional bid at that moment, let them know you heard them. If there’s a gorgeous bird outside, ask your loved one to take a picture so you can share in it together. But by god, hear them. Tell them they were listened to.

[doomhamster]

That *is* a response though! Telling someone “I’m busy/low on energy right this moment, but if it’s possible, I’d love for you to show me this thing later” works just fine. At least so long as you establish a pattern of actually following up on it, even if it’s just going “hey, wasn’t there a thing you wanted to show me? a bird?”

Most people hate being told “later”, but that’s just because most people who say “later” really mean “I can’t be bothered”.

[learningtogirl]

Yeah. This. I have run into this a lot. It’s what kills me about having many friend groups I’m kind of in, but no one I’m properly close to.

Idk why I’m rambling about this especially after such a long post this one is never gonna be read…

[drumlincountry]

If your life is horrible and you need a new source of meaning and direction.... Do NOT find religion. Learn to identify plants.

[secondbeatsongs]

cut open a package of bacon while making food tonight, and then paused to take a pic because I realized the way I open bacon is probably not normal

is it just me? does anyone else do this?

[secondbeatsongs]

update:

(ID in alt text)

I think we've all done something very important here. thank you for your input!

[unsolids-your-snake]

Do you have ADHD

[secondbeatsongs]

do you think I would have learned excel for this if I didn't have ADHD?