Patricia♥

Classy. Colorful. Fun. A simple girl who's admittedly inlove and head-over-heels on books and pizza and.... a cute guy who'll probably never care about my existence :)

[mariah-do-not-care-y]

VOGUE Italia April 1999 Devon Aoki by Steven Meisel 

[naif-kh-deactivated20210811]

i hope you remember, i hope i forget

[pattern-recognition]

some girls aren’t made with sugar spice and everything nice they’re made with garlic basil and olive oil

[cielstudies]

motivation comes from within (ง︡’-‘︠)ง

ig: @studyingg

[fuckstudy]

journal, week 20 to 23. 

Changed rotations. With each new rotation comes a new set of challenges, a new area of law to learn, people, culture, environment. It’s refreshing and exhausting all at once. But in saying that, I’m glad that this is the pace that has been set for this year. 

Because there’s a definite finish line.

While the feelings of doubt and inadequacy are still quite strong, I’m challenging myself to view things a little differently. 

I’m challenging myself to be better than the first negative thought that crosses my mind. 

I’m challenging myself to match every negative thought with a constructive thought; a positive thought. A statement which is actionable. 

Because succumbing to the first negative thought - the first doubt that crosses my mind is too easy. I gotta be better than that. I gotta give myself a better chance than that. 

In the past month, I’ve carved out the time to work out, to reach out, to read (oh fucking god if anyone has read A Little Life, DEAR GOD MY EMOTIONS) and to write. And learning to listen to myself - on what days should I fight the exhaustion, and on what days I need to let myself rest. 

I watched the Caps win their first Stanley Cup; the emotion and the ongoing celebration that ensued (and that’s probably still going) made me smile, made me laugh, made me think. 

I want to have that moment too. That highest of highs. That “I’ve worked so hard for a goal and smashed it”. That satisfaction of getting there; that sense of achievement. I haven’t felt like that since I was fighting to get into university. And given the horror that university was, it made me afraid to reach for a goal - to give up so much, to go through the ups and downs again, only to be disappointed. 

So the first thing to do is to let go of that fear, grow some fucking balls and be brave. 

(as I said to one of my anons, “keep your eyes open, your mind curious and your heart brave.”)

The rest will follow.  

[hufflepuffwannabe]

this past weekend’s accomplishments

My productivity was off the charts, by my standards. This gal with poor executive function was slaying projects left and right like a neurotypical (the stars were in alignment and I had Be Focused and Forest and was taking short, regular breaks). It was unreal. I clocked 11 Be Focused intervals for both Saturday and Sunday. My reward was allowing myself to make a fandom side blog. Too much Marvel stuff has been clogging my “likes.” Today was a day for rest (and going to my job), but I’ll be back at it tomorrow. I’m going to shoot for at least 5 intervals on Be Focused per day. Also, thanks for everyone who dropped by when I did a “study with me”! It was nice having company for my schoolwork marathon.

[kurmastudies]

is it just me, or does the studyblr community make you feel cozy inside? idk, whenever i come onto my tl i just feel like im surrounded by a bubble of people that get what you’re going through + inspirational content that just puts me in the greatest mood

[mid-meditation]

I want to have conversations so good I get chills from the mental stimulation

[vaspider]

Hey friends, especially my creative friends:

These last few weeks have been the hardest few weeks in a long time for a lot of us, and a lot of us are used to hard weeks by now. We’ve had them over and over for the last 2 years, and there’s no sign of letting up anytime soon.

It might seem like you have to constantly fill the world with what will help others, put out art that shows the best part of the world, feed and help others mentally and spiritually.

One of the most helpful things I’ve ever been told about creativity is that it’s like breathing. You cannot simply continually breathe out without breathing in at some point: you’ll run out of air and pass out.

So if you want to avoid burnout on this marathon slog that we’re on, it’s okay to take a day off to watch your favorite soothing TV show, or to take a trip to the beach and sit in the sun, or to create art that does nothing but make you feel good. It’s okay to say ‘I want to take today to make a skirt for myself rather than sew stuff for orders.’ It’s okay to reread a favorite book rather than doing research for a project. It’s okay to write trashy fanfic than putting down words for that essay, that project. 

It’s okay. You have to breathe in. You have to feed yourself as a creative person, you have to give yourself oxygen.

I see a lot of y'all beating yourselves up because you are not outputting on the schedule you want to work on, and need to take a day off, shut down Facebook, or just frankly shut down entirely to fold laundry or play with a dog or watch Great British Baking Show. For the sake of all of us, please stop beating yourself up, and if you are having a hard time feeling okay about that, make it a point to check in on your fellow creatives and ask when they last took a day off, or even an hour off. Check in on your friends, make sure they’ve gotten sleep, they’re drinking water, they’ve taken their meds, they’ve gotten a little outside time if they can.

I see you. I know you’re running ragged. We all are.

Breathe in. This, too, shall pass.

[decaffs]

Being burnt out means you’re probably feeling exhausted, unmotivated, unfocused and just generally “blegh” - an absolute nightmare when you’re trying to stay on track with school and studying. I’ve suffered from academic burn out a lot but it’s now something I know how to cope with, I’ve compiled my best tips and tricks for dealing with a burn out and how to ease yourself back into your studying!

Keep reading

[tryingsobriety]

Days Sober: 361

A really weird thing about recovering from alcoholism (at least in my own experience) is when you see someone, on TV, in movies, in person ect who does embarrassing and/or bad things that are exactly what you used to do drunk. And even though it makes you cringe, you also want to drink and do the thing. It in no way makes being drunk look appealing but you think about how you felt and suddenly you want to be that way again.

I brought this up in counseling yesterday and my absolutely amazing therapist told me that I’m probably remembering the feeling of escape I associate with those actions. That I’m looking for an escape more so than an actual drink. And she’s right. It’s hard for me to sit through hearing people’s stories about using- or seeing it directly- because I get a false sense of jealousy about what they’re (not really) experiencing.

But alcohol is not an escape, it makes my problems worse. So a huge part of recovery is figuring out what it is I’m trying to escape from. I know what a lot of it is for me, although I’m always uncovering new ways to heal (that’s all part of the process). I feel like I’ve made good progress with that, I certainly have a better sense of self and my needs than I did when I first got sober. But it’s a reminder that I need to stay in touch with what’s going on in my feelings, thoughts, and actions.

[chibird]

I know it’s hard to believe now, but you’re going to make good things happen! 💛I’m the kind of person who worries a LOT, about everything, especially the unknown and distant future. But we just have to remember that we’re working hard for a reason, and it helps to look forward to a good future rather than to fear a bad one.

Pre-order Loading Penguin Hugs | Instagram | Patreon

[sheisrecovering]

It’s a beautiful day to choose recovery 🌻💛

[sheisrecovering]

The fire inside you burns brighter than the fire around you.

[girlbloodpaint]

“Fire signs will try to burn you. Little do they know that you already have scars. You can take it. The heat is mild. It can be nice, warm, but it doesn’t have to be what you crave. Blow it out if you have to. Earth signs are beneath your feet, baby. The ground doesn’t move much. They’re not as strong as you’d think rock would be. But soft earth can grow flowers too. Sometimes they’re mountains, and boy will they be brave. Air signs will suffocate you. They just want to love you, but they’re hot air, they’re cold air, they’re a whole lot of wind and a whole lot of storm. For some, they’ll be still, if you’re lucky, or unlucky, depends how you like your breathing. Remember there are different altitudes, different kinds. Water signs will drown you. Mysterious, look at all that depth. Nobody can hold their breath long enough to swim that deep. Its because magic is in the water. You’ll be in a trance, that’s when they’ll get you. Don’t be fooled, somewhere, you have power too.”

— -Lessons from astrology

[girlbloodpaint]

“Fire signs will try to burn you. Little do they know that you already have scars. You can take it. The heat is mild. It can be nice, warm, but it doesn’t have to be what you crave. Blow it out if you have to. Earth signs are beneath your feet, baby. The ground doesn’t move much. They’re not as strong as you’d think rock would be. But soft earth can grow flowers too. Sometimes they’re mountains, and boy will they be brave. Air signs will suffocate you. They just want to love you, but they’re hot air, they’re cold air, they’re a whole lot of wind and a whole lot of storm. For some, they’ll be still, if you’re lucky, or unlucky, depends how you like your breathing. Remember there are different altitudes, different kinds. Water signs will drown you. Mysterious, look at all that depth. Nobody can hold their breath long enough to swim that deep. Its because magic is in the water. You’ll be in a trance, that’s when they’ll get you. Don’t be fooled, somewhere, you have power too.”

— -Lessons from astrology

[girlbloodpaint]

“Fire signs will try to burn you. Little do they know that you already have scars. You can take it. The heat is mild. It can be nice, warm, but it doesn’t have to be what you crave. Blow it out if you have to. Earth signs are beneath your feet, baby. The ground doesn’t move much. They’re not as strong as you’d think rock would be. But soft earth can grow flowers too. Sometimes they’re mountains, and boy will they be brave. Air signs will suffocate you. They just want to love you, but they’re hot air, they’re cold air, they’re a whole lot of wind and a whole lot of storm. For some, they’ll be still, if you’re lucky, or unlucky, depends how you like your breathing. Remember there are different altitudes, different kinds. Water signs will drown you. Mysterious, look at all that depth. Nobody can hold their breath long enough to swim that deep. Its because magic is in the water. You’ll be in a trance, that’s when they’ll get you. Don’t be fooled, somewhere, you have power too.”

— -Lessons from astrology