Why can't I just tell you how I feel.... Like really feel. If I typed this up in my notes or wrote this down I know you'd see it and that makes me hesitate. I want you to know everything and nothing at the same time. Who wants to tell there boyfriend that there too caught up in the past, enough that I can't move forward. Better yet a past that I can't really talk about. Your sad too and I see that, I don't mean as a couple, I think we're defiantly in love. As separate people though, we are both very broken. Before you argue to say your okay, because you can be oh so like me. I want you to know that being not okay, is okay, I see the way your eyes can freeze over, That when I touch the edges of delicate topics your voice shakes, But it's okay we can make it all into jokes, Or fights. If I could go back to any day and re live it again, it would be the night we kissed in that open field. It was so quiet, you could hear my thoughts. How else would you know I needed your kiss so bad. In the distance they highway was dark, the occasional car passed by like a shooting star. Every time, I wished for you. I wanted you to be able to fix me so bad, but I just think maybe I can't be fixed. You still love me though, Always have. The things that happened to me, do not define me. But they do make me heave, And they do make tears run down, And they do make me shut you out. I'm sorry for that by the way, Maybe I've been told to shut up too many times, or hurt a lot, ether way it makes it hard. I feel like my words are stupid and annoying, I like having control of my situation, and telling you how I feel is the farthest from it. My voice shakes because once I say how I feel, what's happened, or what I've done -it will be real. I won't be able to hide from it. And I don't know if I'm ready to bear that weight. I'm not sure you are ether.
ellievsbear
kaledo-art
janainaart
areudirty
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