My Life in Prose and Poetry

I've been through a lot in my short life so far. Because of this I sometimes write poetry about my feelings and other crap like that; I decided I might share some with you guys.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Apparently if you laid every copy of the Harry Potter books currently in print side by side on the ground they would cover an area larger than Brazil… Which ironically is what they actually used to do back when they were trees.

[mypenleaksiridescence]

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

[tastefullyoffensive]

by floccinaucinihilipilificationa

[misophoniasux]

[apheliondust-blog]

Mental Illness

I hate you

for the effect you’ve had on me

but even more

for what you’ve done to him

Why can’t you see

how beautiful he is

how beautiful we could’ve been

without you

[youngplaidone]

Tulips

I brought flowers to your door

handpicked and not from a store.

I didn’t bring you a rose,

‘cause I think we are past those.

I want a kiss from your lips

so I brought you some tulips.

I brought flowers to your grave.

[youngplaidone]

Good Friend

Thought you were a good friend

with me until the end.

I thought you could save me,

but now I clearly see

that we don’t have that in

common.

I guess this is the end.

[youngplaidone]

Bad news: I compromised my sobriety last night. Good news: after a cleansing from a dirty trail run and some meditative yoga I'm ready to start this again. #sober #findyourstrong #weekonedayone

[caughtthefox]

15 facts about people with concealed anxiety

1. They don’t hide their anxiety, they hide their symptoms. To have concealed anxiety isn’t to deny having it – only to do everything in your power to ensure other people don’t see you struggle.

2. They have the most anxiety about having anxiety. Because they are not comfortable letting people see them in the throes of an irrational panic, the most anxiety-inducing idea is… whether or not they’ll have anxiety at any given moment in time.

3. They come across as a paradoxical mix of outgoing but introverted, very social but rarely out. It is not that they are anti-social, just that they can only take being around others incrementally (which is mostly normal). Yet, on the surface, this may come across as confusing.

4. They make situations worse by trying to suppress their feelings about them. They are extremely uncomfortable with other people seeing them in pain, and they don’t want to feel pitied or as though they are compromising anyone’s time. Yet, they make things worse for themselves by suppressing, as it actually funnels a ton of energy into making the problem larger and more present than it already was.

5. They are often hyper-aware and highly intuitive. Anxiousness is an evolutionary function that essentially keeps us alive by making us aware of our surroundings and other people’s motives. It’s only uncomfortable when we don’t know how to manage it effectively – the positive side is that it makes you hyper-conscious of what’s going on around you.

6. Their deepest triggers are usually social situations. It’s not that they feel anxious in an airplane, it’s that they feel anxious in an airplane and are stuck around 50 other people. It’s not that they will fail a test, but that they will fail a test and everyone in school will find out and think they are incompetent and their parents will be disappointed. It’s not that they will lose love, but that they will lose love and nobody will ever love them again.

7. It is not always just a “panicked feeling” they have to hide. It can also be a tendency to worry, catastrophizing, etc. The battle is often (always?) between competing thoughts in their minds.

8. They are deep thinkers, and great problem-solvers. One of the benefits of anxiety is that it leads you to considering every worst case scenario, and then subsequently, how to handle or respond to each.

9. They are almost always “self-regulating” their thoughts. They’re talking themselves in, out, around, up or down from something or another very often, and increasingly so in public places.

10. They don’t trust easily, but they will convince you that they do. They want to make the people around them feel loved and accepted as it eases their anxiety in a way.

11. They tend to desire control in other areas of their lives. They’re over-workers or are manically particular about how they dress or can’t really seem to let go of relationships if it wasn’t their idea to end them.

12. They have all-or-nothing personalities, which is what creates the anxiety. Despite being so extreme, they are highly indecisive. They try to “figure out” whether or not something is right before they actually try to do it.

13. They assume they are disliked. While this is often stressful, it often keeps them humble and grounded at the same time.

14. They are very driven (they care about the outcome of things). They are in equal proportions as in control of their lives as they feel out of control of their lives – this is because they so frequently try to compensate for fear of the unknown.

15. They are very smart, but doubt it. A high intelligence is linked to increased anxiety (and being doubtful of one’s mental capacity are linked to both).

http://neverignore.info/15-things-you-need-to-know-about-people-who-have-concealed-anxiety/

[nandalorian]

IT ME

[rudescience]

Basically what my at the time psychologist said. But this post cuts deeper. 

[youngplaidone]

Mountains

In you I confide these feelings that I can no longer hide released with a sigh. Tell you everything release all my thoughts you sit listening my mind was distraught. Now that it is clear I think it is time for me to hear the mountains you climb.

[youngplaidone]

Home

I’ve lived in many places,

I have known many faces,

but I still have yet to find

another of my same kind.

I searched through the desert and

I’ve looked in the forest land

and walked by the sea.

Home is just a word to me.

[youngplaidone]

Satellites and Stars

When the sun goes down

it gets dark in town.

Let’s go out and lie

down beneath the sky.

Grab a glass of scotch,

to sip while we watch

satellites and stars,

like headlights from cars.

[youngplaidone]

Again

Lately I’ve been depressed again, been feeling sad and downright bad. I’ve been thinking about drinking all my sorrows to tomorrow’s problems again.

[youngplaidone]

Fighter

Wake up every day to face what I slay. Conquer my demons, save the eudemons. I’ll never back down till I wear the crown. Each day looks brighter for I’m a fighter.

[youngplaidone]

Poetry time

[youngplaidone]

Counting Days

It’s been two weeks since my last drink, and I’ll continue to count the days until the thought doesn’t cross my mind.

I've been counting days since I've been in a haze caused by the devil's drink now clearly I can think the days will become weeks and months after the weeks

[youngplaidone]

"Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul." - John Muir #johnmuir #quote #nature #xcountryskiing