your good b*tch

What's up my dudes, welcome

[yourgoodbitch]

I would tremble before God, but I don't think (s)he's eating me out

[kibibarel]

this might just be THE funniest thing i’ve ever seen anyone say on this website

[harmonysama-deactivated20190724]

everyone on this damn website would have to leave if this is what yall start having discourse over

[amitylesbian-remade]

tag yourself: gay cartoon edition

[yourgoodbitch]

Lawful evil and chaotic evil and lawful neutral

[oooy]

Jake Peralta: A Mood

[lindatart]

Shooting at ppl isn’t very nice!

Original text post

[nightofthecreeps]

I asked my lawyer if I could make that joke and he said, “let me call another lawyer”, and that lawyer said yes. 

JOHN MULANEY SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE 02/29/2020

[yourgoodbitch]

Do you ever have the one friend that you love so much because you’re very similar, and you love them so you can tell them everything about yourself including your depression/anxiety things? and then because they know all this about you they can see right through you and so you don’t want to hang out with them anymore because all they’ll see is your pain and you don’t want to feel weak. and then you feel like you’ve lost another friend and want to sob more

[howdoistopthetrain]

Steve, being edgy: do not fear death. Fear the state in which you die in

Peter, in a terrified whisper: ᴺᵉʷ ᴶᵉʳˢᵉʸ

[yourgoodbitch]

What is Tumblr except to show one’s true self

[that-dam-percabeth-shipper]

Attack!

[yourgoodbitch]

Broskis,

So my best friend and I were watching descendants 3, as mature women do. and at the end, of course they did a memoriam to Cameron Boyce since he died recently. #Rip 

yeah, and my friend doesn’t cry very often, but this moved her to tears, and so she had these tears streaming down her face. I should mention that I was sitting in front of her while she was on the couch. and she tilted my head to look back at her lovely crying face

and while I was looking at her, a tear dripped down her chin and fell right into my eye... hahahahahahahaaha i couldn’t stop laughing

all I could think of was the masterminds scene where jandice farted and david was like “Damn it Jandice! you farted right into my butthole! that’s a fart transplant!”

[yourgoodbitch]

it’s hard to cuddle the cheese cat when you can’t fit in the fridge

[yourgoodbitch]

So I’ve been  vising family in oregon lately, and they have the sea lion caves right? and I was just like, if I get a pet sea lion imma name her celia. cuz sealia idk. hmm but what if it’s a boy. LIONard. 

I then had dream that night where celia was basically scar from the lion king and lionard was mufasa, and you know the comic strip meme where its the lion king but sea lions? so celia pushes lionard off the rock. terrible agony.

then, from the fog of the ocean just comes all of these inner tubes, or the ones you go on a boat with, and there in the center is lionard, on this turkey tube that is the turkey version of the unicorn floaty

fun times

[yourgoodbitch]

My brother and I were hiking on the rocks along a creek a few days ago, lol I slipped on a rock and fell into a deeper water area.

HAHAHAHAHAHA i was soaked and i didn’t manage to get my phone out in time to save it #sad

BUT, we kept hiking in this forest area, and a bunch of freaking horse flies kept buzzing around me and it was annoying as hell.

and i was like “gosh, i guess this is what it feels like to be actually wanted”

[yourgoodbitch]

[anonymouslylovesyou]

Chat Noir: I don’t think I’m worth all that much

Marinette, already advancing: Bold words for someone in the hugging range

[yourgoodbitch]

So my brother is going to be an usher at my cousin’s wedding, and they were talking about how she asked him and he had said “it’d be dope” 

And there I was thinking how amazing it’d be if he had said “uh, sure”