I'm so into big bellies hiccuping. Big ole ball bellies that jump.
I'm so into soft bellies hiccuping. Jiggling ripples.
I'm so into prominent bellies hiccuping, the natural pooch that happens right above that line before someone's lower bits. Like the body wants to cinch them in just the right place to create that soft fold for the purpose of my specific enjoyment of it bouncing when they hiccup.
When people lay down and the belly spasms up or in or rocks back and forth.
When people sit and their belly spasms out, forcing their chest up, or folds inward below the ribs.
When people stand and their belly shimmies with each hiccup or shoves upward or outward or is different with every time.
Hiccuping bellies from the side, profiles of jiggling and jerking. Hiccuping bellies from the front, belly button changing shape with each hiccup. Hiccuping bellies from above, belly pushing into and out of view. Hiccuping bellies from bellow, just a jiggle above your head.
I like a thin person, a skinny person, a flat bellied person hiccuping too. But I prefer a belly enough to get tumbled about with each diaphragmic tic. A belly that shows the effect of each hiccup, each hiccup's story, through its mass or softness. A bigger pond to throw a stone in. A bigger bowl to disrupt.
Woohoo, I finished my new Maritza & Eric story! Having multiple series is good for variety/keeping things interesting for me, but it does mean that some characters get pushed to the backburner for a while when shiny new stuff distracts me.
On a requisite night out with Eric's social circle, Maritza realizes that Eric is dealing with an unfortunate predicament.
Content: Embarrassment/stress about hiccups. Obnoxious classist rich college students. Weaponized passive aggression.
Meeting Eric’s mom was just about as scary as Martiza had imagined, and like Eric predicted, Maritza didn’t exactly wow Theresa Langdon. She was sort of coldly civil, which Eric told Maritza afterwards to count as a win.
“It’s just how she is,” Eric explained. “Nobody really impresses her.” He kept his voice light as he said it, but Maritza caught the hurt he was hiding behind it, and she drew him into her arms.
It was hard to imagine that Eric’s mom once had a baby with a man her own parents hadn’t approved of, a relationship that hadn’t been settled like a business contract. Had she retreated into chilliness when things hadn’t worked out with Eric’s dad? After stepping out of the expected high-society line, had she clung to their rules even tighter to get back in their good graces? Had she wanted to keep coloring outside the lines but life drummed it out of her?
Maritza didn’t know, and she thought that asking Eric about it might upset him. So she didn’t ask. She just wondered. At any rate, her questions helped keep her from taking Theresa’s aloof attitude too much to heart.
She also couldn’t help but think about Eric’s last name: Langdon-Reyes. Even though Eric’s dad hadn’t been “part of the plan,” as he’d once said, he still had both their names. His mom hadn’t prevented that. Maybe she’d even been the one to ensure it. And Maritza supposed that was something.
Winter break came and went. While Maritza had a fun time back home with her family and friends, she missed Eric too. They texted and video chatted to “an obnoxious degree,” according to Lila—easy for her to say, her new girlfriend lived a 20-minute bus ride away—and when she returned to Camden in January, Maritza found that she didn’t care about seeming lame or thirsty. She was just happy to be with him again.
“Would it be cool if I moved some more of my stuff over here?” she asked as they cuddled on the couch in Eric’s apartment on their first night back, cozied under a blanket.
If Maritza was lame and thirsty, Eric was too, because he gave her a squeeze and murmured, “Mmm, I’d love that.”
It wasn’t that Maritza was entirely wrapped up in Eric, honestly. Honestly. But as her class load got more demanding, she found she had less energy for the Camden elite and their bullshit and veiled microagressions—even if the latter had gotten less frequent and more covert since they found out she was dating Eric, that didn’t mean it had gone away entirely.
So more and more, they were spending their free time cocooned away from the rest of Camden. They’d put on jackets and gloves and go hiking at Evenswood, or they’d hit up the movie theater or indulge in lazy evenings at the apartment. Was it the most level-headed or balanced way to handle things? Maybe not, but Maritza was feeling increasingly over Camden, and she viewed their one-on-one time as coping strategies to get her through until she walked across that graduation stage and never looked back.
Still, they did occasionally have to put in “face time” with Eric’s friends. It was that weird quasi-networking thing where a lot of their parents did business with one another, so you couldn’t snub anybody for the sake of the stock market or something. It was dumb, and the fact that Maritza and Eric both knew it was dumb helped. As often as he could, Eric supplied plausible reasons for why they couldn’t go to this party or that group hang, limiting the time they spent with that crowd.
“You can totally go if you want,” Maritza told Eric one morning as they were walking Trail #2. “I don’t want to keep you from your friends. If I can stick to making the bare minimum of ‘appearances’ myself, I don’t mind you hanging with them on your own.”
“To be honest, I kind of like getting away from all that,” Eric admitted. “Those guys…” He shook his head, and Maritza caught his jaw clenching a little. At his grandpa’s birthday party, Eric’s best friend Olivia had walked Maritza through his “stress tells,” the small hints of “not okay-ness” that could bleed through even when he was putting on a good act.
“Even before we’d started seeing each other, I’d pretty much outgrown them,” he explained. “It’s nice to claim coupledom as a reason not to go to their stuff.” With a soft, self-conscious smile, he added, “And sometimes I get tired, having to be ‘on’ all the time, you know?”
Maritza took his hand, stopping them in the middle of the trail so they could kiss. “You should come around my way this summer,” she suggested. “Spend as much time in the city as you want. My friends are lovable weirdos who aren’t fake, and we’re good at adopting strays.”
She winked, and Eric laughed. “Sounds like a plan,” he said, putting his arm around her as they started up a leisurely stroll.
“Also, you badly need more melanin in your life,” Maritza told him. “People of color beyond just me and folks who work for your family.”
“God, I know,” Eric replied.
“Although, fair warning, my mom will spend the summer saying she has to fatten you up,” Maritza warned.
Eric grinned. “This plan just gets better and better.”
The following week, they had their requisite face time with the Camden crowd—that’s how Maritza had started thinking of them, which felt more accurate than “Eric’s friends.” They all met up for dinner at one of the fancier restaurants in town. Maritza’s Princess Diaries lessons with Eric had paid off well, and she could go to a high-end restaurant without getting confused about silverware, experiencing a gut punch of dread at the priceless menus, or feeling too out of place.
Of course, the Camden crowd could sneak in flasks and be rude to the waitstaff to their heart’s content, but god forbid if Maritza unfolded her napkin wrong.
She couldn’t deny that the food was really good, though. While she’d still take her abuelita’s cooking any day of the week, Maritza liked getting fancy dishes in three courses. Tonight, it was salmon croquettes for an appetizer, chicken in a delicious pomegranate sauce for her main, and she was already looking forward to dessert—she didn’t know what she was gonna get yet, but probably something chocolate.
Okay, so the food helped her get through it too. Easier to listen to Brody Chatsworth brag about his planned getaway to Ibiza for spring break when she was eating like royalty. “Ugh, I’d kill to go to Ibiza!” Hayley Cavendish groaned. “We’re just doing stupid St. Barts.”
“I like St. Barts,” Tina Franklin offered.
“It’s sooooooo boring!” Hayley insisted.
“What about you, Maritza?” Danielle Mercer asked sweetly. “What are you doing for spring break?”
“Go Greyhound,” Jason Hamilton murmured to Lindsey Westbrook, who laughed like she was on the verge of climax.
Maritza was learning that, while Jason and Lindsey were the most overt assholes of the group, Danielle wasn’t one to be counted out. She was good at looking doe-eyed while giving backhanded slaps, and she was always finding excuses to cozy up to Eric in ways she probably wouldn’t dare if he was dating Hayley or Tina.
And the truth was, Maritza had less than an interstate bus trip planned. “Nothing special,” she said, shrugging and pretending she didn’t see the smirks. “Probably just—”
Eric slipped his arm around her waist. “It’s a surprise, actually,” he informed the table.
At those words, the table was split between wordless surprise and tantalized exclamations. “Seriously? Langdon, that’s so generous of you!” Danielle said with an admiring sigh. She was sitting on the other side of him (because of course she was,) and she sort of hugged his free arm.
“Charitable, you might say,” Lindsey remarked.
Count Maritza among the “wordless surprise” contingent. “You, uh…huh?” she managed to stammer out. Was he actually planning on taking her somewhere, or was he just saying it to get everyone off her back?
“I don’t really see it that way,” Eric replied. “I like traveling, and I like spending time with Maritza, so it’s a win-win for me.”
His tone was casual, but he rubbed his thumb across his mouth: stress tell. Maybe Eric was planning a trip, maybe not. Either way, he didn’t like this conversation. Or Danielle hanging off him, for that matter.
“Hey, you’d better step it up,” Lindsey told Jason. “Langdon’s gonna start making you look bad.”
Maritza held back a snort of laughter. Start? For one, Jason didn’t need anybody to help him look bad. For another, Eric had been outclassing him since freshman year, at least.
“Oh yeah?” Jason asked. “‘Cause I was thinking the Virgin Islands.”
Brody laughed, probably because Jason said “virgin.” The whole Camden crowd launched into a debate about the best vacation spots, with lots of arguing between private beaches, ski resorts, and party destinations. Scintillating, they were not.
And hey, Maritza liked travel—or at least, she liked the idea of travel based on watching travel shows. But didn’t these guys ever talk about music or hobbies or interesting video essays they’d stayed up late watching on YouTube?
She started a little as Eric suddenly leaned over and murmured in her ear, asking, “Hey, can I h-- have some of your water-*mmp!*”
It was an odd question to ask in a restaurant filled with waitstaff that was ready to serve Camden kids at the drop of a hat, and Maritza answered, “Uh, sure,” on a kind of autopilot.
Shooting her a look and a grateful nod, Eric reached for her glass. That’s when Maritza noticed his jaw clenching. What was the matter? She glanced down at his plate. Had he swallowed down the wrong pipe or something?
Eric drank Maritza’s water with long, deep drafts, as if he was trying to quench a heavy thirst or put out a five-alarm fire on his tongue. But she couldn’t imagine his lobster tail was unbearably salty or spicy.
Then, setting the glass down, he drew in a breath and held it. Oh, crap.
He was rubbing his mouth again. Maritza rested her hand on Eric’s thigh and gave it a squeeze, hoping he’d welcome a comforting touch. He glanced at her and offered her a flicker of a smile.
When he exhaled, discreetly, Maritza saw Eric’s head jerk back within a couple seconds. “Didn’t work?” she asked in a low voice. He shut his head, running his hand through his hair.
Stress tell number three—the whole trifecta. Eric hiccupped again, keeping it completely silent. But Maritza caught the head jerk.
She couldn’t really blame him for being on edge. Maritza wouldn’t want to have the hiccups in front of these guys, either. Remembering how he’d helped her at his grandpa’s party, she whispered, “Do you want to go to the bathroom? I can come meet you in a minute or two, if you want some help.”
“Yo, Langdon!” This was Jason’s voice, and while it startled Eric, it unfortunately wasn’t enough to scare his hiccups away. He suppressed another.
As he turned toward Jason, Maritza saw Eric wait for his next stifled hiccup before he said, “What?”
Jason laughed. “You asleep over there or just eye-fucking Maritza?”
Eric cleared his throat. “What is it?” he asked, getting the question out between hiccups.
“Aspen or Vail?” Jason prompted.
“Oh.” Eric rubbed his knuckles across his mouth as he muffled another hiccup. “I’m not really that big a-*hup!*-a skier.” Maritza could practically see him willing himself not to cringe.
Most folks at the table didn’t seem to react—maybe they didn’t notice, but then Danielle cooed, “Ohhh, Langdon, do you have the hiccups?”
If blushes showed up on Eric’s complexion, Maritza would’ve bet money that he’d have been beet red. Ducking his head, he ran his fingers through his hair. “Oh,” he mumbled. “Um, y-- yeah.” He pressed his knuckles to his mouth and hiccupped again.
Brody laughed and Jason smirked, while Lindsey rolled her eyes. “Oh, poor thing!” Danielle cried. “Here, let me.” She signaled one of the servers. “Excuse me! We need more water over here!”
“No, it-*hmmp!*-it’s fine,” Eric insisted. “I already tri-- tried that.”
“Not like this, you haven’t,” Danielle replied. Adding an exasperated, “Not mine, his!”, she honest-to-god snapped her fingers at the server as she motioned for him to refill Eric’s glass.
Eric sank down a little in his chair. He held in another hiccup, then mumbled, “Thank you,” to the server, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
Maritza winced. According to Olivia, when Eric’s stress tells persisted, headaches probably weren’t far behind. “Look, Danielle, just don’t worry about it, okay?” she offered. “It’s not a big deal.”
Normally, that’s probably what Eric would’ve said about getting the hiccups, “not a big deal.” Tonight, though, they very much were. But based on Eric’s reaction, Maritza didn’t doubt that Danielle making a fuss over him was the worst part of it.
“It’s fine, rea--*huck!*” Eric pressed his lips together and cleared his throat. “Uh, really.” He drew his fingers through his hair, at the back of his head this time.
“No, this works every time,” Danielle assured him.
“Come on, Langdon,” Jason needled, in a tone that suggested he wanted to settle in with some popcorn and watch the show.
“It works every time,” Lindsey echoed, amused.
Eric’s head jerked back with a silent hiccup as he rubbed the spot between his eyes. “What do I h-- have to do?” he asked in a low voice.
“Here,” Danielle said, handing him the water. “Try and drink it from the wrong side of the glass.”
Jaw clench. “That doesn’t wor-*herk!*-k on me,” Eric explained.
“Just try it!” Danielle urged.
“Yeah—it can’t hurt,” Hayley pointed out.
Eric’s sigh was interrupted by a “*hic-ulp!*”, and he snapped his mouth shut. “Whatever,” he muttered. He pushed his chair back a little and leaned forward, putting his mouth on the far rim of the glass.
Jason’s eyes shone as he argued, “Hey, man, not like that!” Eric paused and, muffling a hiccup, turned to him with a puzzled frown. “You have to do it properly. Stand up.”
Eric swiped his hand across his mouth. “I’m not doing tha-- at.”
“It is a lot easier to do it standing up,” Danielle noted.
With a self-conscious glance at all the people dining around them, Eric replied flatly, “I’ll ma-AN-age.”
Before anyone else could say something, he bent forward again and started to drink. It was a little awkward—the Camden crew, naturally, thought the whole thing was funny—but Eric managed to down the glass with minimal spilling.
“There,” Eric said, straightening back up and setting the glass on the table. He rose from his chair. “Be right back.”
“Aww, that wasn’t so bad, was it, Langdon?” Brody joked.
“It worked, right?” Danielle asked.
Eric didn’t reply, just headed off in the direction of the bathroom, but Maritza saw him pressing his fist to his mouth. She got up and followed him without a word to any of the assholes.
So, after a few months or twenty billion years or however long it's been, I finally managed to perform some kind of storyectomy on myself. This is one of the more out there ones, so do take the TWs and kink notices fairly seriously, but I did have fun writing it, and I'm hoping it'll help unclog the drains so I can do a bit more in the near future. We'll see. Anyway, have some pupplay between a girl and her werewolf.
(Honestly, more werewolfy than hiccupy, and they take a while to start, but I tried.)
TW: Dysphoria (mtf), Anxiety
Kinks: Hiccups, transformation, werewolves, puppy play, Actual sex (Focus on dick, getting off, handjob, boob-touching), breeding (fantasized about)
"Okay, we've just had dinner, I've been drinking water all day, I just went to pee, so hopefully I won't need to when...all the stuff happens..."
"I can deal with it if you do, Terri. I'm a nurse, I've cleaned worse."
"Yeah, so I shouldn't make you do more of it."
Terri heard Afsoon sigh, and she could feel her eyes following her as she paced rapidly back and forth in the shared space of their apartment. "You'd think after however many months we've been doing this, you'd be less anxious about it." Exactly seven months tonight, but who was counting?
...Terri. Terri was counting. And she knew for a fact her roommate was too, given that Afsoon had playfully bought her a six-month anniversary cake the last full moon and let her eat the whole thing in preparation.
Given how these nights went, it felt weirdly appropriate.
Terri stopped that thought in its tracks and wrenched her brain away from fantasies of what was going to happen later, away from her gorgeous, chubby roommate in her pretty fucking nightgown who was way too fucking calm for where she knew this was going, and away from wanting to kiss and/or lick her, given that the fucking sun was barely out of the sky. No. None of that. She forced her thoughts back to her checklist. Ropes? No. She didn't do that anymore. No muzzling either. Afsoon insisted after the second month. No tranquilizers. Those had been the first thing to go. When Afsoon found out what she was doing with them, Terri was half surprised she didn't turn into a horrifying monster out of sheer rage.
...that wasn't funny. But for some reason, those jokes kept finding their way from Afsoon's lips into Terri's head anyway.
Lock all the doors? Done. Put away any breakables? Done. Prepare, um...implements? That was, uh...that was Afsoon's job. She'd take care of that as necessary. Just thinking about it made Terri's face burn.
Finally tell the full truth?
...no.
The shame balled up in her gut as she knew she wasn't going to do that tonight. She wasn't going to do it any night. And it wasn't like she'd lied. She'd never intended to. It was just...
It was complicated.
"Hey." Afsoon's hand landed on her shoulder, and Terri whipped around, a bit of drool ending up on her cheek as she realized that her teeth and tongue were crowding the inside of her mouth. "It's okay." Afsoon's voice was soft and kind, and she stared at Terri with warm, brown eyes. "Deep breaths, Ter. Deep breaths." Despite the tension in her chest and her thoughts sinking heavier into her mind, Terri shut her eyes tight and forced herself to inhale, slowly and carefully, before it coughed and shuddered unsteadily out of her. "Good. Again." Afsoon breathed deeply and demonstratively, and even with her eyes shut, Terri could hear the way the air flowed through her, feel her body's position subtly change through their touch, just barely smell the mint of her toothpaste. Her face ached. Her body ached. She breathed. "Good girl. Just keep breathing."
"U'm—" Terri tried to speak, the pronoun swallowed by the changing shape of her mouth. "U'm showrr—"
"Shhh. Shh shh shh. It's okay." Afsoon pulled her into her arms, even though Terri knew she must have been drooling onto her shoulder, and she could feel herself growing against her, feel her bones shifting and creaking inside of her body. "You're clinging to yourself, Terri. I know it's hard. I know it's hard to let go. But it's okay. It's safe. I promise, I'll catch you."
Her brain was getting foggier and foggier, and even though Terri was pretty sure she'd said this before, she wasn't certain, and she needed to be sure Afsoon knew. "N-Noh wowried abough me—"
"I know, Terri, I know. But you don't have to worry about me either. Trust me. I've handled far more belligerent patients than you."
She knew what those words meant. She knew she did. But right now, she couldn't grasp them. They were somewhere far away inside of her brain. It always happened so much faster than she was ready for. But she could hear the smirk in Afsoon's voice. The confidence. And she could feel her grip on her tighten, not painfully, almost comfortingly, reminding Terri of Afsoon's strong, well padded muscles in contrast to her own atrophied ones. "Hhhh...hhhhhh...!" She tried to figure out how to say...something. Anything. Whatever it was that she was supposed to say.
"I know. I know. It's okay, Terri. It's okay. Come on, let's come down to the floor here. I know being up on the furniture makes you nervous while you're still changing." Long nails trailed and combed through her hair, briefly scratching behind one of Terri's slowly growing, moving ears. Terri huffed. She didn't mean to, but she did. And when Afsoon knelt down, she fell instinctively onto all fours and didn't even try to stay up. "Good girl. Yeah, that's my clever girl." Good girl. Those words sent a shiver down her spine. A wrong sort of shiver. She could feel herself growing in all the wrong ways. Something was clinging to her. Something was on her body. Something— "Ready to get those clothes off, huh?"
Clothes. Right. Clothes. Fuck, how had she forgotten so quickly? She couldn't let Afsoon see her like this. Naked, scared, halfway through her disgusting transformation. She couldn't— "Hey. I hear you thinking in there." A tap to her forehead made Terri open her eyes for the first time in a while. Afsoon looked into her, but it wasn't scary. It wasn't dominant. At least, not in a cruel way. It still made Terri feel like she was under control, though. "It's okay, Terri. We've done this before, we'll do it again. Now let me help you get your shirt off, okay?"
Terri nodded. It took her a moment to remember how to do that, but she did it. She nodded. Her head was heavier than before. Especially the front of it. Afsoon reached over her and grabbed the back of her shirt, pulling the neck up and over her head before carefully running it down her arms, helping Terri take out one hand, then the other. If you could still call them hands. The fingers thickening and shortening. The nails elongating into claws. "Okay, we can wait on the skirt and panties since I know you hate that part. Let me get your bra, though. You always get uncomfortable with it once the fur really starts growing in."
Bra...the thing still on her chest. She wore those now. Terri tried to lift her arms to hide her breasts, but her sense of balance was gone and she fell forward, only stopped from hitting the floor by Afsoon catching her. "Nope. Mostly a quadruped now, remember? Stay on the ground. Only one paw up at a time." Terri growled. She wasn't sure why, and she immediately lowered her head and whimpered apologetically, but Afsoon laughed, and Terri realized that it was a joke. A playful growl. A conversation they had again and again about calling her hands and feet "paws" before they were actually fully like that. Breath huffed out of her in a laugh too, as much as she could. Half-laugh, half-growl. "Yeah yeah, I know." Afsoon's voice was playful too, and she touched at Terri's back—at her bra, right—and unhitched it, letting it fall forward off of her arms so she could step out of it one paw—one hand at a time.
"*hrnk!*" Fuck, it was starting. It was starting. This always happened. She knew this always happened. But even so, something inside of Terri started to panic while something outside of her started to grow. "*HRNK-rrlk!* Nnnnhhh!" She whined as her stomach jolted outward, still just a bit overstuffed with food, which somewhere far away she knew was being rapidly digested to feed the transformation into the beast. But much more important, she lowered her head down and curled in on herself, trying to hide that...thing between her legs. Arms in. Head down. Tail in. Tail...what there was of her tail. She didn't know how much of it there was yet. "*HRNK-llk!* RRrrrrrhhhhh...!" she whined, writhing with shame and fear and confusion and frustration and—
"Breathe, Terri. Breathe." There was a hand on her back. Warm. The pressure slightly muted. Not skin to skin right now. Still good though. "As best you can, anyway. I know you've got the hiccups." That word! Every bit of Terri stood on end as her whole body pulsed and she whined. "I know, Terri. I know. And that's okay. There's nothing to be worried or ashamed about. It might make breathing a bit harder, but I still need you to try and do it for me, alright?"
A nod. She forced herself to nod again. Her chin was to the ground, so it barely worked. Terri would show her instead. She forced air in a stuttering, staccato pace into her lungs, interrupted by another hiccup that made her muscles twitch, then exhaled it out in much the same way. "Again." Afsoon's voice was commanding, but kind, and Terri breathed again. In, hiccup, out, hiccup. Afsoon kept rubbing her back, the gentle pressure so comforting, not flinching even as she bounced back against it. "Keep going, Terri. You're doing such a good job tonight." Good. She was doing good. Her tail wagged. "Yeah. Exactly like that. Good girl."
Good girl.
Terri's body melted against Afsoon, still whimpering and hiccuping as she continued to change, but the panic easing out of her. The anxiety wasn't gone, but it was getting further away. Especially with the kind hums above her as she laid her head in Afsoon's lap and the feeling of her nails as they kept combing through her growing fur. Something in her said she should feel guilty about enjoying this so much. But that something got harder and harder to reach as she changed. And soon, Terri's focus was pulled out of her thoughts and into her body, moving from breath to breath, and waiting from hiccup to hiccup.
Terri half barked at her hiccups, and she heard giggling above her. Afsoon's nails were still combing over her. "Aww, poor thing. You're calming down now though. That's so good." Of course she was calm. Why wouldn't she be? Everything was the way it was supposed to be. Her belly wasn't hungry. She would like more food, she always would, but there was no yawning chasm inside like there used to be. The person she liked most was touching her. She had the hiccups, and that made her feel really good. Though, now that she thought about it, something was keeping her dick trapped close to her body, and she squirmed against it and tried to kick at whatever that was. "Finally ready to get the skirt and panties off, huh?" The voice above her was warm, amused, and so familiar. So familiar and so so so beloved. Terri leaned up and lapped her tongue across Afsoon's face to make sure that she knew. Afsoon laughed more. "Hahaha, okay, okay. Let me help you out, big girl."
Girl. Terri felt her tail wagging. Somewhere far away, she sort of understood the words. She knew generally what Afsoon was going to do and knew how to move as she pulled those cloth things off of her waist and out from her legs, leaving her free and naked to wriggle against the soft, carpeted ground. But for reasons she didn't fully understand, "girl" was one of her favorite words. Right next to "good" and "food" and—"*HRK-rrk!* Hhrrrrrr..."
She heard more of Afsoon's beautiful laugh and felt her warm hands on her belly, rubbing roughly through her fur and making Terri writhe happily underneath her. "Hiccup hiccup, huh, Terri?" Hearing the words, Terri writhed more, whining and yipping between the noises that kept coming out of her. "Yeeaaaah. Poor girl. You got the hiccups pretty bad, don'tcha? I can feel how bouncy they are inside of your tummy." She patted her hands firmly against Terri's stomach, tapping out a beat, a concept that she wasn't sure why she knew, but it didn't really matter. What mattered was that she kept hiccuping and Afsoon kept rubbing her tummy, her hands pressing firmly against it whenever it bounced, and that pressure pulsing downward from her belly and into her cock, which was dribbling already into her fur. "All that changing does some weird things to your diaphragm, huh? I guess we're pretty lucky that's not a problem for you."
"*HRK-glk* Hhrrrrrrr–*RRK!*" Terri whined and tried to curl up, trying to use her frontmost paws like she knew she did sometimes, like she knew she could do just like Afsoon did, but her body didn't bend the way that she meant it to, her dick far out of reach. Even so, the motions of her belly made her dick twitch, and looking up at Afsoon didn't help. Terri's tongue hungrily lolled out of her mouth, and she huffed desperately at her.
"Awww. Terri's got the hiiiic-cups~" Afsoon would sing sometimes. Mostly longer, softer songs. But that little, tiny one was always Terri's favorite and least favorite. Her whole body curled in and she whined, trying to hide her face in her paws as her hips helplessly thrust against nothing. "You do! You've got the hiccups, Terri!" Afsoon gave her tummy a few rough scratches through the fur, her hand bouncing right along with it as she hiccuped. Her other hand moved higher up, starting to rub and press into Terri's chest, finding the strange, soft parts she'd been growing. Teats? For some reason, Terri had teats now?
Whyever that was, they were incredibly sensitive, and she whimpered, her tail wagging so hard that it was slapping Afsoon's legs as she knelt to her side to keep petting her torso. "You're such a silly, hiccupy girl." Terri's tail wagged even faster, and Afsoon moved up so she could take Terri's face and gently squish it between her hands, roughly playing with it. "Yes you are," her voice took on a slight growl as she played more, grinning down at her. "You're my silly, hiccupy little puppy." Terri whined and barked up at her, though her bark was cut off by a hiccup that made her whine more, and Afsoon laughed. Her smile then softened, and the way she gazed down at Terri made her almost forget that her hiccups or anything else in the world existed, just staring up at her. "I can't believe that you thought I should be afraid of you. Of course you're just as sweet like this, Terri. Of course you are."
After a moment, Afsoon leaned over, wrapping her arms around Terri's shoulders (to the extent that was what she had), and moving her full body over her bouncing chest and belly, letting a bit of her weight rest on her as she nuzzled in. Terri huffed softly and wrapped her legs around her as best she could, a small frustrated growl catching between her hiccups. She knew that this was supposed to be easier, and that it was easier sometimes, but when she was like that she never actually tried to hug her. She let out a few small barks and snarls that her hiccups mostly let her get away with, tail thumping with annoyance at the version of her that could never tell Afsoon a single thing, even though she was the one with the voice.
"Hey, you okay?" Afsoon lifted her head off of Terri's chest and looked down at her, running a hand over her furry cheek. For lack of a better way to say that she was, Terri tilted her head up and lapped at Afsoon's face again, making her laugh. "O-hokay, okay. I'm glad to hear it, you goober." She wrapped her hands around her face and gave her ears a few scritches before pushing herself up to kneel by her side again. "Still pretty hiccupy though, huh?" Terri hiccuped to answer, it coming out louder than most of them, and she wriggled and tried to hide her face again. "Yeah," Afsoon giggled, rubbing her tummy again. "I bet you're thinking about getting rid of 'em, huh?" Terri's tail started wagging faster, and she felt her cock twitch as Afsoon said that, her hands moving up to rub over her sensitive chest again. "Well then," Afsoon's face curled into a smirk. "How about I go and get you a nice, cool bowl of water so you can—"
"GROUF! *HRK!*" Terri barked at Afsoon, who burst out laughing. Seeing her laugh, Terri just barked more, rolling onto her feet for the first time and shaking herself off so she could get right in her face. That wasn't how Terri wanted to cure her hiccups and she knew it! "rr–*hrk*–rrrraugh raof! *HK-rrk!*" She dipped her head to try and shove it under Afsoon's bowed chin and force herself into her line of sight.
After some more laughter, Afsoon playfully shoved her away. Terri was always caught off guard by how much stronger Afsoon was than her, even though she was so much bigger. "Okay, okay, I know what you mean." Afsoon sighed, then knelt up and shoved Terri again, pushing her more gently onto her side, then rolling her onto her back again, her legs falling open along with her mouth, breath coming out in huffs between her hiccups, and leaving her chest and belly completely open and bouncing for anyone to see. Terri's tail started wagging harder at that possibility, her face warming under her fur. "I know what you mean, Terri." Afsoon moved from looming over her to laying by Terri's side, and Terri looked over to see her, watching her lean on one hand while rubbing the other up and down her chest and belly. "Never realized this was going to be part of the job description when you told me you turned into an 'evil beast' once a month." Terri growled and huffed, rolling her eyes at the memory and the knowledge of saying and thinking those things. Afsoon's smile got a little...warmer, but somehow also meaner, and her hand went lower. "Not that I'm complaining." She wrapped around Terri's shaft, and Terri whimpered between her hiccups. "At least I get to do this with some part of you."
Afsoon spoke so softly. Terri wasn't sure she realized that she could still hear her. She'd heard it before, and it always made her sad and frustrated and so so so determined to do something about it once she could talk again, and even though she was the other her, she could still never fucking understand why she didn't actually do the thing she wanted to do! All those worries, all those thoughts, all those words and words and words all the goddamn time, so many that they even infected her when she was like this! Like now! She didn't want words, she wanted—
At the first stroke, Terri let out a high-pitched combination of whines and hiccups, and all those stupid thoughts started floating away as she pulled back into her body again. Her hiccupy body with a bouncy belly and sensitive teats along with her cock, so hard it was starting to ache. She wriggled, and Afsoon's laughter just made her wriggle more, bouncing again and again with every hiccup. "Yeah, you really like it, huh, cutie?" Afsoon moved to sit up again, using the hand that wasn't stroking Terri off to scratch her behind the ears before drifting around the side of her head, along her neck, then down to her soft, swollen chest. Terri writhed, then yelped when Afsoon's fingers tripped over one of her nipples. "Oh shoot, you oka—" Terri thrust her hips harder into Afsoon's hand, trying to somehow push her chest and her cock up towards her at once, even though her hiccuping belly kept straightening her out again. She heard more of Afsoon's wonderful laugh. "Okay, glad to hear it, Ter. But let me know if you need me to stop, okay?" Just the opposite. Terri never wanted this to stop. She wanted Afsoon to keep touching and rubbing her and for her body to stay warm and big and hungry and hiccupy forever, to just stay like this.
...well, maybe not just like this. Maybe her teats would keep growing. Maybe her belly would get bigger too. Maybe the reason this had happened was Afsoon had somehow put a litter of pups into her. She had no idea how that'd be possible, but if anyone could figure out how, it would be her. Or maybe she could turn Afsoon over and fill her up with puppies instead. She dreamed about that all the time, breeding with her, being on top of her, her body not able to stop hiccuping with excitement as she filled her to the brim, and maybe Afsoon hiccuping under her too, under her spell, feeling good like she did some nights. Afsoon hadn't let her yet, but Terri wanted so bad to make her feel good too, to lick up the juices between her thick thighs, to drink in the smell of her, to learn every part of her soft chubby body and just—
"*HRK!*–HHHhhrrrr!" Fuck, she was so close. Fuck, Terri had gotten so close so fast. She hadn't even realized it, and she writhed against the ground, growling and snapping and kicking her legs as she tried to thrust further into the warmth of Afsoon's hand. "*HN-nrrk!* hrrrRRUFF! Gurrugh! *HUK!*" Her barking let a hiccup come out completely unmuffled, sounding halfway like another yelp between her snarls, and her quick breath made her hiccups start to come faster and faster.
"Good girl, Terri." Afsoon's soft voice made her whimper and whine, and when Terri looked up at her, the way she was smiling at her made her whine even more.
I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you
If only her stupid stupid stupid other self would actually tell her that!
Terri tried to make her know the only way she knew how, flipping over and climbing over Afsoon. Afsoon yelped, clearly surprised by that, and for once Terri managed to overpower her, getting on top and licking her face all over, her hips continuing to thrust against nothing. She didn't care. Even as she was hiccuping and humping, it didn't matter one one-billionth as much as trying to let Afsoon know how much she loved her.
Or, at least, that's how she meant it to be. But when Afsoon lifted a leg underneath her, Terri's out of control hips brushed her cock against Afsoon's clothed knee, and that was enough and too much, leaving her hiccuping tightly as her whole body tensed, and her hips couldn't stop rocking as she finally came, spurting lines of white all over Afsoon's beautiful body.
All the thoughts were trying to come back into Terri's head, even though she couldn't even start to understand them. She whimpered and whined, back curling, hackles raising, good feelings overwhelming, but bad feelings forcing themselves into her through the cracks. But then there was a hand against her face again. "Hey. Hey, Terri, hey." Terri opened her eyes and saw Afsoon smiling softly up at her, and a small whimper coughed and hiccuped out of her. "Hey. It's okay, Terri. It's okay. You were a very good girl."
Good girl.
Terri just melted over Afsoon at those words, flopping down on top of her. She heard the "Oof!" underneath her, but didn't want to get up. "O-okay, okay, hang on, Terri. Let me clean us both up first at least." Afsoon gently rolled her over, walking away, then coming back with a warm, wet washcloth, which she started running over Terri's sticky belly. Terri growled and grumbled, feeling the water seep down to her skin. "Yeah, I know. Don't worry, I'll try and dry you off too. Just let me get changed."
God, Terri was so tired.
Why wouldn't she just sleep during the day? This was the only time that she could be like this, why wouldn't she just fucking—
Afsoon came back before she could get too deep into her frustration. "Tuckered out already?" Terri weakly "rrrRuff"-ed up at her. "Yeah, that makes sense. Well, I'm not just letting you go to sleep on the floor. hhhhHup!" She made a sound almost like a hiccup that made Terri do something like groaning as Afsoon picked her up from the ground. "Hwoof. You're getting heavier, big girl." Terri whined. "Don't worry, that's a good thing. You were too thin, and you're building your muscle mass back up. Might mean that you'll have to get better at walking yourself pretty soon, though."
Even though she said that, Afsoon managed to haul Terri over to her bed. It smelled like Afsoon. Terri was so glad that she let her stay here these nights. She watched Afsoon get changed, and she hiccuped a few times at seeing her naked. She wished that she'd stay that way. Wished she'd let her see her like that for longer. But she didn't complain when she didn't. Because once Afsoon was redressed, she would join her in bed, cuddling up to her and burying her face in her fur. "You're such a good girl, Terri," she said, her voice heavy and soft. Terri nosed down at her to sneak a small lick to her face, and Afsoon giggled. "You're such a good girl." She paused with a yawn. It was never long after she laid down that Afsoon went to sleep. "I love you so much, Terri." Terri whined and nosed more, and Afsoon laughed softly and looked up at her. "I know. I know, Terri." Her warm, brown eyes made Terri's heart thump in her chest. "I know you love me too." The smile on her face got sadder, though, and she hid her face more completely in Terri's fur. "I just wish that you'd remember it whenever I say that."
She did though.
Terri did remember.
The first time that she woke up after Afsoon took care of her, Afsoon had told her (with more than a little embarrassment for both of them) how the night had gone, and Terri had been horrified to realize that, without the drugs in her system, she remembered every moment of it.
And she loved every moment of it.
She loved feeling simple and cared for and free. She loved wanting her fully, without any reservation. She loved being in her body, being nothing but instinct and pleasure, with nothing but warmth and safety to spend herself on.
Terri hated words when she was like this. Words were what made her hate herself every other night of the month. Words were what made everything so complicated and bad. But she knew she loved some words. And she knew that she needed them. So as her body fell towards sleep along with Afsoon, she made her mind say them again and again, so that maybe tomorrow she'd listen.
Tell her. Tell her tell her tell her tell her tell her.
And even though she hated words so much, the possibility that she might actually listen was enough to make her sleep happy and last through the night.
there arent a lot of ppl who understand the vulnerability of hiccups as deeply as this in general. you do not only understand that vulnerability, but have essentially made a very realistic and complex analysis of that vulnerability by amplifying it and making it as visible and intense as possible with all the other aspects of the story.
im gonna level with you that i was pretty high reading this the first couple times so all i could say was "wow this made me feel every emotion" but like... oh my god my thoughts go so much deeper than that. it makes me think about how these fics have really evolved since the days of the tripod and whatnot.
there was a post i reblogged recently about how hiccups are the sexy part, and ppl have often made the mistake of simply adding hiccups as a side thing to something they already think is hot. that was a problem that made a lot of the tripod hiccup fics not do a lot for me back in the day (well that and they were all straight 🙄)
but i think this shows how far we have come from back then!!! how much more we are willing to think about what makes fantasizing about this so thrilling! how much more we can focus on the hiccups themselves and how positivity can come from them! and all the representation we always missed out on!!!
that is all to say i dont think ive ever personally connected so deeply with a kink fic before. i wanna hug terri so tight and so close. her experience makes me realize that we dont talk enough about how deeply personal catharsis, contentment and fulfillment plays into kink.
anyway just... i hope im not being too overbearing but... elacular, oh my gosh, you have outdone yourself 🥺
i haven't really been active for a bit cause ive been so incredibly busy (and still am, im moving countries guys) but i haven't been able to get smth off my mind and it made me remember something i came up with when rambling about hiccups with my partner!
i find it fascinating how different hiccups are person to person, its such an under appreciated thing to me because its so?? no one persons hiccups are identical to anothers and its beautiful so i made the chart above when me and my partner where talking about headcannons of different characters hiccups!
basically the idea of it is you go through and get letters, ending up with string of letters that is a hiccups type!
for example my own hiccups would be AMQUTJ
idk if this is anything but i think its fun!
soooo drop what your favorite type of hiccups to write or read or whatever would be classified as! mines FILPDE!
do you want to play tomodachi life but don't have a switch, $60, or just don't want to pay nintendo $60?
here's an all-in-one site where you can download everything you need to emulate it!
Floralith beta — downloads and setup.
also, with an emulator, you can directly screenshot and record your game, and even mod it! add custom hair parts! import photos directly! remove region locks! emulate it!!
everything?
everything! this site will walk you through downloading the ryujinx switch emulator, the firmware and keys needed, and the nsp game file for tomodachi life ltd.
is this safe?
the files are all directly downloaded from this site, so there's no third party to worry about. i didn't make this site - it was created by PotentialAd943 on reddit, who claims they scanned their files clean before hosting. just to be sure, i scanned my pc after downloading too. it all came up clean! but it's good to be aware of pc safety, especially when pirating. it can't hurt to do a scan of your own to be sure!
how much pc knowledge do i need for this?
you should know how to download files, how to make and manage folders in file explorer, and how to navigate a program's settings menu.
any settings i should change in ryujinx?
here's some i recommend checking before starting the game:
for tomodachi life specifically, make sure you set a timezone in settings! you can have it match your pc's time for simplicity.
there are ostensibly keyboard controls, but they're a little wonky to figure out. if you can, plugging in any controller should work just fine. just make sure to select it in ryujinx's input settings! (you should also still be able to use your mouse for things like drawing facepaint!)
graphics settings will be on a per-pc basis, depending on your pc's strength. it's worth it to experiment with them and see what gives you the best performance. ryujinx will explain what each setting does if you hover over it!
the game crashed?
that's very likely to happen! on first time loading a scene, the emulator can sometimes struggle. it happened to me the first time i opened the mii editor, and the first time i opened the news station. you should be able to relaunch and everything will be fine. if it's happening super frequently, though, you may need to adjust your graphics or cpu settings!
a sixth thing i didn't think of?
feel free to leave a reblog with comment or send me an ask! if you need more specific guidance, i'll be happy to help! i'm not an expert on emulation, but if nothing else, i can try to point you towards a reddit thread that is more competent than i am
i hope you have fun playing the game! i did not create this site, but i found the creator in a single reddit thread asking people to spread the word, so i figured i'd do what i can and make this post. if it works for you, please help out and spread the word even further! thank you!!
Character A putting out far too many goodies for Character B's limited self restraint to go hog wild on, specifically so they can give themselves the hiccups from overindulgence without it seeming to be a deliberate scheme on A's part.
Hey guys! So, this is the first in a new series of stories that take place during the events of $tar Treķ: Enterprıse, but with a bit of canon divergence. I'm currently on season 3 of this series, but I was captivated by two ships in particular, and no I'm not talking about starshıps. I don't know how long this series will be, nor do I know if I'll write for the other ship I have, but basically they're just little one-shots that involve my favorite ships so far. Hopefully it'll make sense after the next two, which are based around certain episodes, unlike this one.
For reference:
CharIes "Trip" Tuckeř III: chief engineer, he has three pips so he's...they call him Commander, I am so bad at this, impulsive, smart, but seems a little airheaded, has a Southern accent, he's a pansexual trans male in this particular AU
MaIcolm Rėed: tactical officer, he has two pips and they call him Lieutenant, closed off, private, mysterious, a bit cynical, has a British accent, he's a gay aceflux trans male in this AU (subject to change cuz I can't make up my mind)
CW: hiccups, fast hiccups, like crazy fast hiccups, so fast that the hiccuper has to catch his breath, uncomfortable hiccups, stubborn hiccups, mentions of masculinizing hormone therapy(mht), inaccuracies for terminology and the characters probably, but I tried, possibly abrupt ending
I'm just staring and stalling at this point...idk why I'm so nervous when I honestly love how this and the other two came out, lol
And now, without further ado, I give you the story! Enjoy!
When MaIcolm Reed awoke the morning with a hard "hulk!", he knew today wasn't going to be a good day.
Reed always had trouble with hiccups. Growing up, he'd have them almost every day. Things had definitely worsened when he'd started MHT. He'd have them multiple times a day every single day. It was torture, but worth it in the end, the results were greater than he'd expected.
Now, as an adult, he'd still get hiccups quite often. He was still prone to them if he ate too fast, drank carbonated beverages, or burped too much. However, for days like this, when he awoke with hiccups, he knew it was an all day ordeal.
Despite the fact that he despised his own hiccups, he found himself quite attracted to other people's hiccups. He wasn't sure if it was his way of coping, but he discovered that he'd found them hot, as long as the person hiccuping wasn't in pain or uncomfortable.
He hadn't expected to have to deal with this on the Enterprıse, but he supposed he should've expected anything at this point. He'd gotten the common cold for crying out loud!
Reed groaned as he sat up from his bed, hiccupping hard again.
"Gah, bloody-'gyuh! hell," he grunted. "Can't wor-hurk!-agh like this."
Reed had considered his options. He could go to sick bay and request a note for him to be off duty for the day. He could picture the conversation now.
"All of this over a case of hiccups? My, my, they must be serious. But I don't see how they will impede on your work. Try holding your breath, I'm sure they'll go away."
He would not be taken seriously over such a menial inconvenience.
He could also just tough it out and go on duty anyway. There was always bound to be some ridicule and the classic "cures" people loved to tell him about. He would have to stay away from Trip. He didn't want to embarrass himself around him in particular. He knew that Trip would get a kick out of teasing him and although it could be endearing at times just to see his sunny smile light up the room, he wasn't in the mood to be the subject of humiliation today.
He could just remain in his room. He could lock his quarters, not answer communication, just ignore the world. There would be repercussions for the insubordination. Someone would probably attempt to check on him at that point.
Reed huffed and sharply hiccupped again, wincing afterwards. Then again until it turned into a rapid fire cluster that had him gasping for air a few seconds later.
Staying inside his room it was. He lay back down in his bed and lifted the covers over his head.
~
When MaIcolm didn't show up for duty and ignored communications, Arčher sent Trip to go and check up on him. Trip didn't mind, he'd grown quite fond of MaIcolm and was concerned about his disappearance act.
He made it to MaIcolm's quarters and rang the bell.
"MaIcolm? It's Trip," he greeted, "just checking up on-"
He suddenly heard a strangled sound. Trip's heart raced as he panicked. He tried to get inside, but the door was locked. So instead, he tore open the panel and short-circuited the locks, sliding the door opened. Trip ran inside, not seeing MaIcolm at first, but then he spotted rapid and constant bouncing coming from MalcoIm's bed.
"Hold on, MaIcolm, I'm coming!" Trip ran over and pulled the covers from over MaIcolm.
The tactical officer looked at Trip shocked, but he couldn't say anything with the rapid cluster of hiccups that were assaulting him. They were all silent and MalcoIm just wished he could breathe.
Trip's eyes widened, his hands preparing to go into CPR mode, but MaIcolm swatted his hands away.
"Hold still, I'm tryna save you!" Trip scolded.
"Com--comman--der, ple--please le--leave," MaIcolm tried to say between hiccups and breaths.
"I ain't going nowhere til I know yer okay!" Trip placed his hands on his chest, suddenly feeling a familiar sensation, "wait a sec...are those hiccups?"
MalcoIm blushed and covered his face just as the hiccups gave him some reprieve. He took in a few freeing deep breaths before glaring at Trip.
"What are --bip! you doing he-h'gup!-here?" He demanded.
"I would ask ya why you ain't at yer post, but I can see why," Trip smirked and sat on the bed.
"Don't m'bah! laugh at m-hmmk!-my pain-ngup!" MalcoIm groaned, hiccuping twice in quick succession.
"They sound real bad," Trip worried.
"Don't wo--wor--" MalcoIm shut his eyes tight as his body jumped with hiccup after hiccup after hiccup.
Trip could do nothing but watch in sympathy. MalcoIm had hiccupped nonstop at least ten times Trip had counted.
"Damn..." Trip muttered as MaIcolm fought to catch his breath.
"Bloody hell nk'GAH!-ugh," MaIcolm lay back and stared at the ceiling.
"How long have you had them?" Trip wondered.
"Ever sin-hnk-since I wok--ke up an hour ag-'gyuh!-go," Malcolm huffed, turning to look at Trip, "please hip! don't te--tell ngup!-up!-ugh anyone."
Trip nodded, "should I take you to sickbay? Those rapid fire ones ain't too good for yer breathin'."
"I'll be--" another rapid cluster attacked him, so Trip helped him sit upward as if it would help in some way.
Trip didn't know, maybe it was helping. He just didn't want MaIcolm to be in too much pain.
When MalcoIm's cluster ended a few seconds later, Trip patted his back, "you alright?"
MalcoIm glared at him grumpily, "never m'bup! better."
"I get the feeling yer bein' sarcastic," Trip suspected, but shook it off, "however, what cures those hiccups a' yours? Or do you call 'em hiccoughs?"
"I call hup!-uh them the fo-hok!-former-up!-uh," MalcoIm groaned, "an-ngup!-and nothing-'gyuh!hiyuck!-uff works herk!"
"Well, I reckon I can get rid a' those pesky hiccups," Trip smirked and crossed his arms.
"Don't e-heelgk!-uh, don't even bo-hok!-bother," Reed said with some trouble, "nothing HICK!-gah, nothing blo--bloody works hulk! You'll be was-hip!-wasting your tim-mmk!-ugh, for crying out lou--oud!"
"It's my time ta waste," Trip insisted, "now, I'll be back with some supplies. You just sit tight."
Before MalcoIm could respond, Trip was gone. He groaned and dragged a hand down his face, taking his covers and sticking them into his mouth, chewing them. Another rapid cluster hit him.
It was going to be a long day.
~
"Listen hilp! I appreci-ATE, Christ," Reed huffed and rubbed his chest slightly, "I really a-hup!-appreciate what you're trying to do hup'k! but I'd hate for y--you to miss out on all of your huckulp! duties because of m-mk!-me."
"Engineering has many talented folks that got it covered," Trip gave him that warm smile that strangely made Reed's stomach do flips, "right now, you're my top priority."
Blimey. He'd be shocked if his face wasn't as red as a firetruck.
"If you HIUP!...say so, sir-urk!" MalcoIm glanced away.
"Just call me Trip," Tuckėr corrected him.
"S'that hickulp!-uh, is that an or--order?" MalcoIm furrowed his brows, looking back at Trip.
"Does it hafta be?" Trip glared at him confusedly.
"I suppose no--not," MaIcolm looked down.
"Right, now, time ta rid you of those pesky hiccups o' yours." Trip rubbed his hands together.
"I alread--dy told you HIP! nothing works hickup!" MalcoIm groaned.
"There's gotta be something," Trip looked through the supplies he'd brought, "yer just bein' pessimistic as usual."
"M'not being hulk!-ugh, pess-hic!-mistic," MalcoIm patted his chest as it jolted silently. "I'm being hilp!-uh, realistic."
"What cures have you tried before?" Trip asked curiously.
"Water, hol-ngkulp!-agh, damn," he winced and rubbed his neck, seeking comfort, "holding my breath hiup!, um-mpk, bloody-hic!"
MalcoIm groaned and slumped as the rapid fire hiccups kept interrupting him. Trip bit his lip concerned.
"Damn, those sound horrible," Trip worried.
"They are heek'm!-ugh," MalcoIm complained once he was able to.
"Then we'd better get started. Now, this is my mom-mom's guaranteed cure," Trip offered a cup filled with murky liquid to MaIcoIm.
The tactical officer sniffed it, then cringed pushing it away, "eugh! What huck! is in that?"
"Lemon juice, orange juice, molasses, fish oil, and what yer prob'ly smellin' is the kombucha and the vinegar," Trip pointed out.
MalcoIm looked at Trip as if he had two heads, "yeah, I'm hm'gmpk! I'm not dri-hickip!-drinking tha--at."
"Come onnn," Trip crossed an arm, still pushing the cup towards MaIcolm, "dontcha want yer hiccups to go away?"
MalcoIm huffed, cut off by another hiccup. He nodded. He took the glass.
"Now, drink it slowly," Trip advised him.
MalcoIm grumbled before drinking the concoction, groaning the whole time. Once the glass was emptied, he pushed the cup into Trip's hands.
Trip deflated slightly, "huh? But that's guaranteed ta work..."
"Perhaps I'd h'gup! have to m'bah! be a Tu-huck!-Tuckėr for it to HUU'AH!-" MaIcolm covered his mouth, blushing embarrassed.
Trip whimpered, rubbing MaIcolm's back. He felt the shudders of even more spasms and held him through it. MaIcolm leaned into his hold, both of them jolting back with MaIcolm's aggressive hiccups.
When the cluster stopped again, MaIcolm nuzzled his head into Trip's neck, inhaling the weirdly comforting industrial scent of hot metal with a hint of honeysuckle.
"Uh...MalcoIm?" Trip cleared his throat, fighting off the blush lighting his cheeks.
MalcoIm's eyes widened and he pushed Trip off of him, hugging his knees, "s-sorry 'buh!-ugh."
"It's alright, if ya want comfort-"
"What else hu'ulp! did you have 'BIUH!-" MalcoIm covered his mouth again, "in mind?"
Trip sighed and opened a packet of sugar, "let this dissolve in yer mouth before swallowing."
MalcoIm slumped slightly at the sugar before dumping the sugar into mouth. He let the sweet substance stay on his tongue the best he could while muffling his hiccups. When he eventually swallowed the sugar, he'd hiccuped almost immediately afterwards.
But Trip was determined. They'd tried multiple different tactics. Lemon, salt, making him sneeze, standing him upside down, telling himself he wasn't a fish, making him laugh, a substitute for peanut butter, since MaIcolm was allergic, various breathing techniques, everything. And still, MaIcolm was hiccuping. It'd had been at least another hour of cures.
MalcoIm was laying down on his bed and Trip's head was lying on MaIcolm's stomach, bouncing alongside it.
"I don't understand, we've tried everything!" Trip shouted in frustration.
"I told nk'GAH! you, nothing HUCK'AAK! works," MalcoIm grumped as he tapped his fingers together, his eyes following the pattern he was making.
"There has ta be somethin' that we haven't tried..." Trip thought for a minute or two, the room silent other than MalcoIm's hiccuping.
Trip smirked as he waited a moment more before yelling out, "boo!"
MalcoIm blinked and raised an eyebrow, "did you hoolp! seriously think ngup! that would HUIUH! work?"
"Was worth a shot," Trip huffed before thinking of something else.
His eyes lit up as an idea formed in his head. Trip had witnessed this while watching an old show where someone had gotten hiccups and they went away with a kiss.
Could he do that though? As attractive as he thought MaIcolm was, he respected him way too much to get this wrong. But he was all out of ideas. And if all else failed, he could chalk it up to being a cure for the hiccups, nothing more.
"Trip?" MaIcolm noticed Trip had suddenly gotten quiet.
"Don't be mad," Trip said as he sat up.
MalcoIm tilted his head, confusion written all over his face, "mad? HUCK! Mad about-"
He was interrupted when a pair of lips crashed into his own. MaIcolm's eyes widened when he realized Trip was kissing him. MaIcolm's eyes closed as he kissed him back, his hands in Trip's hair. Trip was still on top of MaIcolm as they both readjusted to get more comfortable. MalcoIm quietly groaned into the kiss as Trip tilted his head to deepen the kiss.
Until Trip realized what he was doing and released. The room was silent, besides the labored breathing of the two men staring at each other in shock and awe.
"Trip?" MaIcolm glanced at his lips.
"MaIcolm, I-"
"Please, do it again?" MaIcolm requested.
Trip's eyes sparkled, that sunny smile MalcoIm loved so much appeared. Trip giggled and nodded, "gladly."
Trip leaned down and kissed MaIcolm again, his hand caressing his cheek as MaIcolm's hands found Trip's hair again.
The two of them continued their kissing session, despite the clear fact that MaIcolm's hiccups were gone.
Before they could get too distracted, the bell rang. Someone was calling for MaIcolm.
MalcoIm reluctantly released the kiss and answered the comm. "MaIcolm here."
"It's H○shi, everything okay?" the ensign voice rang through the system.
MalcoIm and Trip exchanged looks as MaIcolm rubbed his bottom lip with his finger, "yes, apologies for my tardiness. I, um...was not feeling well, but I am much better now."
"That's good to hear. I guess Trip really helped you there, huh?"
They could both hear the smirk in her voice and both men blushed.
"H○shi," Trip said in a warning tone.
"We'll be there in fifteen," MaIcolm told her.
"Make that twenty," Trip corrected before taking MaIcolm's finger off the comm, looking into his eyes, "now, where were we?"
MalcoIm smiled and blushed, "Trip– Commander! I...w-we should be getting to the bridge."
"What's the rush?" Trip smirked as his eyes followed MalcoIm's scrambling to get ready.
"I'm already bloody late," MaIcoIm shrugged on his uniform, zipping it up. This was out of his routine, he was out of his comfort zone. He had to compensate, he'd never been late before.
"Hey, hey, you seem tense," Trip pointed out.
"I blew my perfect record all because of those damned hiccups," MalcoIm huffed.
"I'll ask the cap'n to leave it off yer record," Trip offered, "he owes me a favor."
MalcoIm shook his head, "mmm-no thank you. It would stay in my conscience."
Trip nodded, "well then, you need any help gettin' ready?"
MaIcolm's heart fluttered at the offer, "you can just stand there and smile."
Trip chuckled, "just smile? That's it?"
MaIcolm nodded, "yes."
Trip raised an eyebrow before smiling brightly. MalcoIm smiled back and walked towards him. He kissed his cheek, "you can light up the whole ship with a smile like that."
Trip's freckled cheeks were painted pink at the compliment, "MaIcolm, you feelin' okay?"
"Dinner, 1800 hours, just the two of us," MalcoIm said instead of answering the question.
Trip felt his heart pounding out of his chest before he smiled even brighter. "Yes, I'd love that!"
"Then it's a date?" MaIcolm bit his lip as he clarified.
"It's a date," Trip agreed.
Malcolm squealed and pulled Trip in for a hug. Trip happily hugged him back. He couldn't believe he was going on a date...with his crush...who he may or may not have kissed to get rid of a bad case of hiccups.
Speaking of...
"Hey, I just realized, yer hiccups are gone," Trip noted as MalcoIm finished getting ready.
MalcoIm furrowed his brows and touched his neck, "blimey...I can't believe it."
"Must'a been the distraction," Trip winked.
"My hero," MalcoIm rolled his eyes fondly.
The two of them then left the room, MalcoIm instantly noticing his broken lock.
"I'll fix it," Trip promised sheepishly, "it's my highest priority."
"I could confine you to quarters for breaking and entering," MalcoIm raised an eyebrow.
"I thought someone was stranglin' you," Trip explained with a pout.
MalcoIm chuckled, "you are just too easy."
Trip shook his head and the two of them headed to the bridge to take their stations.
After finishing the job on his own, Ollie comes out to the van to find Darren still has the hiccups.
Continuing my Whíté Vän Män fic! Again, here's a brief description of the show and images of the characters:
Whíté Vän Män is a British sitcom about Ollie, who puts his dreams of starting his own restaurant on hold to take over his dad's handyman business (after his dad is forced to retire because of heart issues.) Along with the work van, he inherits his dad's slacker assistant Darren.
Darren - A skilled handyman, but he's easily distracted and *will not* do something without a good reason--and "because I'm the boss" isn't good enough for him. Very chill, enjoys it when Ollie is annoyed.
Ollie - An okay handyman, but he doesn't have his dad's knowledge or experience (or Darren's, which adds to Ollie's struggle to maintain his authority.) Very precise, very uptight.
New character in this chapter:
Liz - Darren's sister, who works at their uncle's hardware store. She's into Ollie, but he doesn't realize it.
Also, for @hiccupscloud27, here's a screenshot of the mural in Darren's flat, of him and the other characters dressed in Stär Trék uniforms!
Darren looked up as Ollie came out of the house and back to the van. Watching Ollie shove his tools and supplies in the back, Darren said, “Hey. Job d-*hiiup!*-done?”
Ollie paused, glaring at Darren. “Oh, for—” he sputtered. “They’ve not gone away yet?”
Darren lounged in the front of the van, head resting against the window with his feet up on the seat. “Nope,” he replied. “*hmmp!*”
As Ollie made his way up to the driver’s side, Darren swiveled round, languidly tucking his long legs under the dash again. “I can’t keep listening to this,” Ollie whinged. Starting up the van, he checked the schedule for the next job. “You’re driving me up the wall.”
Honestly, Ollie was too easy to annoy—no challenge at all. It almost wasn’t worth it. Almost.
“I’m the one who actu-*huck!*-actually has hiccups, and they don’t-*hmmp!*-bother me,” Darren noted. “So why are you ma-- making such a fuss?”
Oof, the silent hiccups hurt a bit, made it feel like they got stuck somewhere round Darren’s chest or the base of his throat. He wrinkled his nose.
“Do us a favor and just shut up,” Ollie instructed.
“Okay,” Darren drawled. He closed his mouth, loosely. “*hmmp!*” He snuck a glance at Ollie. “*hmmp!*” The restauranteur-turned-handyman was well irritated. “*hmmk!*”
Ollie groaned. “Oh my god….”
* * *
There were a few things they needed for their next job, so Ollie swung by the hardware store. They both got out of the van, and Ollie scoffed at Darren as he leaned against the storefront, lighting up a cigarette.
“Good luck managing that with those hiccups,” Ollie told him.
“Naw, it’s all a-*hup!*-about timing,” Darren replied lazily.
“Just don’t come crying to me when you’ve sucked smoke down the wrong pipe,” Ollie warned. He headed inside, leaving Darren out on the sidewalk.
“Hiya,” Liz called, flashing Ollie a grin as he came in.
“Hey, Liz,” he said. “I need—”
“Yeah, your dad called it in,” Liz told him. She nodded to a couple bags on the counter. “Here.”
“Right, thanks,” Ollie said, pulling the company card out of his wallet.
“Anything else you need?” Liz asked as she rang Ollie up.
“A way to stop your brother hiccupping?” Ollie suggested.
Liz rolled her eyes. “Can’t help you there,” she replied. “Nothing gets rid of them. He can be at it for hours. You just have to wait them out.”
“Hours?” Ollie cried. “Jesus!” They were coming up on one hour now, and that was infuriating enough.
Liz shot him a fond smile, holding back a chuckle. “Sorry.”
Speak of the hiccupping devil, Darren loped into the store. “Oi, cl-*huck!*-client called,” he announced. “Leaky si-*hic!*-sink.”
“Hey, Darren,” Liz said as her brother hopped onto the counter.
Darren gave her a slight nod. “Hey. *hup!*”
“Hear you’re driving Ollie mad,” Liz remarked.
“Madness is a st-- a state of mind-*hiiup!*” Darren informed her. “He’s allowing himself t-*hup!*-to be driven there. Nothing to do w-*hmmp!*-with me.”
“Never mind that,” Ollie ordered. “When did me dad call?”
“He didn’t,” Darren said. “*hup!* Client called your m-*hok!*-mobile.”
“And you answered it??” Ollie exclaimed. Shame that labor laws probably frowned upon dropkicking assistants.
“You left it in-*hmmp!*-the van,” Darren pointed out.
“Christ, what must they have thought when they heard you?” Ollie griped. “‘Curry & Son, drunken handymen.’”
“I’m not dr-*huck!*-unk, though,” Darren said.
“The hiccups, Darren!” Ollie told him. “Taking a work call with the bloody hiccups.”
“I didn’t know-*hup!*-it was a work call.” Darren wasn’t the least bit ruffled, which aggravated Ollie even more.
“So why’d you answer it then??” Ollie demanded.
“I thought it mi–” Darren winced a little, “might be Emma.”
“God…” Ollie moaned.
“First you don’t wa-*hok!*-want me answering work calls-*huck!*” Darren said. “Then you don’t want me answeri-*hmmp!*-answering non-work calls. What am I-*hup!*-meant to do?”
“Maybe not answer my pissing phone?” Ollie retorted.
Darren turned Liz. “He’s getting v-*hmmp!*-very worked up with very little provoca-*huck!*-cation.”
“I hate to admit when Darren’s right,” Liz said, “but he’s got a point, Ollie. It’s not that big a deal.”
“It’s unprofessional!” Ollie insisted.
Liz let out an amused laugh. “What do you expect him to do about it?”
Ollie was ready to write the both of them off now. “Let’s just go,” he muttered. “Where’s the dodgy sink?”
Darren’s head snapped back with a “*hmmk!*” as he grabbed Ollie’s purchases. “In the loo?” he said, sounding slightly perplexed at the question.
“The address, Darren!” Ollie prompted. “What’s the address?”
“Oh.” With a “*hup!*”, Darren said, “I wrote it down,” in a disinterested tone.
Leaky sinks were time-sensitive, so that got bumped to the top of the list. With any luck, it wouldn’t take too long and they could stay within their window for the next job on the schedule. Might not, though—while Darren loaded up the van, Ollie made a mental note to ring Mr. Davis if it looked like they wouldn’t finish in time.
When they got to the clients’ house, a young woman came to the door. “Hello, Ms. Sawyer,” Ollie said pleasantly. “Curry & Son, here to fix your sink.”
“Oh, thank god—lifesavers, really,” she told him. Beckoning them to follow, she added, “It’s just here.”
Darren gave a “*hup!*” as they stepped inside. “It must’ve been you I talked to on the phone,” Ms. Sawyer remarked. She glanced back at him, smiling. “You’re even cuter in person.”
Grinning, Darren replied, “Thanks. *hok!*”
“You’ve not got rid of those hiccups, though?” she asked.
“No,” he said, “sa-*hmmp!*-sadly…”
They reached the loo, and Ms. Sawyer told Darren, “Why don’t you come with me? I know a few good cures you can try.”
“We do want to get this job done so we can get out of your hair,” Ollie urged. No way was he gonna let that bastard wriggle out of helping again.
“Leaky sink’s hardly a two-man job, is it?” Ms. Sawyer said. “I’m sure you can handle it.” She gave Ollie an expectant look as she pushed the door open for him.
Oh, what the hell? There’s no way this was happening a second time!
But it was. Ollie stepped into the small loo, and Ms. Sawyer took Darren by the hand. “You, come with me,” she said sweetly. “Let’s get you fixed up.”
“Yes, *huck!* please,” Darren answered, following her.
It's time for another unhinged fanfic choice based on the actor I'm currently obsessed with, woohoo! I wasn't sure what to expect from posting these, whether anybody would even read them--it made me really happy that people liked the first one that I shared. Even though I knew literally nobody would've seen that movie, I was proud of that fic and how it turned out, so I'm glad that other people like it too. :-D
Okay--description, character images, and fic under the cut!
Whíté Vän Män is a British sitcom about Ollie, who holds his dreams of starting his own restaurant on hold to take over his dad's handyman business (after his dad is forced to retire because of heart issues.) Along with the work van, he inherits his dad's slacker assistant Darren.
Darren - A skilled handyman, but he's easily distracted and *will not* do something without a good reason--and "because I'm the boss" isn't good enough for him. Very chill, enjoys it when Ollie is annoyed.
Ollie - An okay handyman, but he doesn't have his dad's knowledge or experience (or Darren's, which adds to Ollie's struggle to maintain his authority.) Very precise, very uptight.
There's another character who'll show in in the next chapter, but I'll save her picture for next time.
Onto chapter 1!
It was mid-morning, and Ollie and Darren were putting together new beds for a client’s kids. It had been hard to wrangle Darren, as usual—he’d spent the first half-hour poking round the bedroom, checking out what toys the Leongs’ two sons had—but he’d settled in now and was actually working. Ollie hoped he was getting a better hand on how to manage Darren.
The assistant was lying on the floor, screwing a footboard in place. “*hup!*”
Ollie glanced Darren’s way, but he didn’t take much notice until the second “*hmmp!*” Looking up, Ollie waited tersely, tools in hand. And five or six seconds later, what did he hear? “*hiiup!*”
“What’s the matter with you?” Ollie asked.
“What?” Darren replied, not looking up from his work. “*hmmp!*”
Ollie suppressed a sigh. “D’you have the hiccups?”
“I’d have thou-*hup!*-thought that was obvious,” Darren said mildly. His head snapped back as he hiccupped again.
“What does that ha-*hok!*-have to do with anythi-- ing?” Darren argued. He grimaced a bit at that silent hiccup. “Not like I can-*hmmk!*-help it, can I?”
“It’s unprofessional, for starters!” Ollie pointed out.
Darren raised an eyebrow. “Are you saying I-*huck!*-have an unprofessional dia-*hmmp!*-diaphragm?”
His indifference was getting on Ollie’s nerves. “Exactly!”
Shrugging, Darren replied, “I dunno wh-*hup!*”-at you expect me t--” another slight grimace, “to do about i-*hic!*-it.”
“Just—just hold your breath or something,” Ollie insisted.
“Won’t help,” Darren said. “*hmmp!*” When I g-- get them,” he rubbed his chest a little with the heel of his hand, “nothing really works t-*hup!*-to shift them. J-*hiiup!*-just have to wait un-*huck!*-til they go away.”
“Would you just shut up and listen to me for once?” Ollie ordered. “You probably don’t do it long enough. Now hold your breath, and don’t stop until I tell you to.”
“F-*hok!*-fine,” Darren said. Dropping his screwdriver on the floor, he lay back and drew in a deep breath.
“Hear that?” Ollie remarked. “Peace and quiet at last. I could get used to that. Just keep holding it.”
Darren shot Ollie an annoyed look, but he did as Ollie said. While Ollie worked on the headboard on the other bed, Darren held his breath, playing absentmindedly with his hair.
Ollie considered stretching it out longer than necessary, but he decided against it. Getting Darren to do anything could be hit or miss, so Ollie didn’t want to push too hard when he was actually cooperating.
“All right, let it out,” Ollie said. Darren exhaled in a puff, and Ollie added, “There, you see? That’s better, isn’t it?”
Before Darren could reply, his thin streak of a body jerked with a strong “*hup!*”
Ollie’s face fell. “Shit.”
More than just not curing his hiccups, getting Darren to hold his breath had derailed his focus. It took Ollie a good ten minutes to badger him back into working on the beds. When you could get him to work, he had the skills for it, but Darren was practically like a teenager sometimes, distractible and obstinate. Ollie couldn’t imagine how his dad had put up with having such a lazy shirker for an assistant.
Finally, though, Ollie got him back on track. All the while, Darren kept right on hiccupping. If he were at all sheepish about it, or trying to get rid of them, Ollie wouldn’t have minded so much. But the hiccups didn’t seem to bother Darren one bit, and by all accounts, it didn’t even occur to him that he might be a nuisance to anyone else.
On he went, strong “*hups!*” and “*hmmps!*” Slightly louder “*hoks!*” when he let his jaw go slack as he concentrated, tongue poking out. And it looked to Ollie like the hiccups that made no noise were the only ones that registered as unwelcome to Darren. He often gave a small wince or grunt after a silent head-jerk—they must’ve been harder and more uncomfortable than the audible ones.
By Ollie’s count, Darren’s hiccups had been going on for a solid twenty minutes when Mrs. Leong poked her head into the bedroom. “How’s it looking in here?”
“Coming along,” Ollie told her, looking up from his work.
Ollie was nearly finished with the bed he was putting together, and Mrs. Leong stepped in to admire it. “Oh, that is nice.”
At a “*hup!*” from Darren, she turned. “Have you got hiccups, love?”
Ollie grimaced. “Yeah, sorry about him.”
“Nothing to apologize for,” Mrs. Leong replied. “He can’t help it, can he?” She added to Darren, “Could I get you some water?”
Darren nodded. “Yeah, ch-*hmmp!*-cheers.”
“Back in a mo,” she told him.
As Mrs. Leong bustled out of the room, Ollie pointed out, “I thought you said nothing cured them.”
“Yeah, that’s right,” Darren said. His head rocked back with a “*hiiup!*”
“She’s just gone to fetch you water!” Ollie exclaimed.
Darren shrugged. “Thirsty, ar-- aren’t I?”
Ollie couldn’t help feeling a bit satisfied when Darren massaged his chest with his knuckles after that silent hiccup. Served him right, the irritating git.
Mrs. Leong returned a minute later. “Here we are,” she said to Darren, offering him a glass of water.
A “*hmmp!*” hit him as he got to his feet. He accepted the water and said, “Thanks.”
Mentally, Ollie was crossing his fingers. All right, so Darren had been right that holding his breath didn’t help, but maybe he was still wrong about nothing curing them.
Darren drank the water down in a few long draughts. “Thanks,” he repeated as he handed the glass back to Mrs. Leong. “*huck!*”
She tsked, asking, “Oh, no joy, eh?”
“‘Fraid not-*hup!*” Darren replied.
“Poor thing,” Mrs. Leong tutted. “Why don’t you have a rest? Ollie can finish up here, can’t you?”
Un-bloody-believable. Ollie forced himself not to sigh aloud. “Of course, Mrs. Leong,” he said, plastering on a courteous professional smile.
“Excellent,” Mrs. Leong said. She patted Darren’s shoulder before she left.
Darren watched her go, then gave Ollie a satisfied smile. “Right,” he said. “*hmmk!* I’ll see you back at th-*hup!*-the van.”
He sauntered out of the room, leaving Ollie to finish both beds on his own. “Wanker,” Ollie grumbled.
I love it when people fight against their hiccups.
When they first start and they bend their head forward and tuck their chin as if trying to suppress a belch or burp. They might not know the sensation in their throat is going to be a hiccup attack, but they feel it and they're trying to silence it.
Then one spasm turns into two and then multiplies quickly as they wince in effort before giving up and letting out airy "Hup!"s.
They're not wincing in pain but in effort to wait out the interruptions until they realize they're not going to stop anytime soon.
They could've been in the middle of saying something when they first felt the pressure. Or they could have been intensely listening to someone else speaking. Regardless, they are now garnering attention for something they can't control but is utterly adorable.
Once it's clear and accepted they have the hiccups, they relax with some mild frustration to the fact. And then it's all about mitigating damage. If the case isn't too bad, they can muffle them and still keep concentration. But if the case is fast or loud, whoever is with them is definitely going to pause to at least take considerable notice, unless they're known for hiccuping fairly frequently.
This is just...such a hot scenario to me. I see this happening with Otto a lot when he's with he and Atticus' friends. It could be a short violent case lasting no more than 20 or so seconds. Little interludes everyone is familiar enough to let pass without more than a chuckle or a rub to his back.
Or it could be a longer case everyone has learned to be patient with. It's just part of who Otto is. And maybe they have a moment of amnesia when he starts hiccuping, because it doesn't happen all the time. But then they remember, oh yeah, Otto does that sometimes.
Meanwhile Atticus really wishes moments like this could be witnessed without anyone caring if they rubbed themselves crazy in the corner while watching. And Otto wishes he'd worn looser pants.
It goes without saying, but Reptile is the single most ravenous predator in all of Mortal Kombat. Almost every encounter with lower tier fighters ends with Reptile devouring his enemies. And due to the extremely volatile acids in his digestive system, he digests everything he eats a pretty rapid rate. As a result, Reptile is hungry all the time unless EXTREMELY stuffed to the brim. Meaning, no matter how much he’s eaten, he’s always got room for more.
Under normal circumstances, Reptile doesn’t get bloated. His stomach acids are so corrosive, that anything he devours is dissolved rather quickly. But there are exceptions. If Reptile is incredibly overindulgent, then the heavier or fuller his belly is, the weaker his acids work in such a confined space. And of course, bones don’t fully dissolve, so if, say, he devours multiple people, his belly can be full to the brim with broken but un-dissolved bones. More to the point, Reptile is so ravenous that he isn’t above devouring cyborgs either. And as such, his scaly belly can expand by about five feet at its absolute fullest; a rarity, but not impossible.
Despite his corrosive stomach acids, Reptile is actually very prone to bellyaches. A mixture of immense overindulgence or eating something or someone that didn’t agree with him causes some serious digestive discomfort for the Zatteran assassin. Sometimes, there’s too many bones festering in his gut. Or he ate a cyborg whose mechanical components aren’t digesting. Or he ate a creature potent with toxins. Because Reptile’s digestive system IS so corrosive, it breaks down the most lethal potency of any poisons before it can do serious harm to the beast, but it does still give him a serious case of indigestion. If he’s been poisoned at all, then either his bellyache will eventually subside, or Reptile will vomit the poisons out of his system, hopefully, somewhere he doesn’t mind the ground getting dissolved. Other times, he will actually have to vomit out the bones, armor or mechanisms that aren’t digesting. Usually, he does so by pressing into his belly firmly with both hands to disrupt the pressure, almost like he would if he was trying to burp, but in this instance, pushes hard enough to work it all the way out. However, if the bones or components ARE small enough, instead of needing to vomit, Reptile will actually just belch them out of his system, pressing into his belly and burping bone fragments out of his system with each eruption. If he’s with Khameleon, she will actually knead and press Reptile’s belly to work really big, rumbling belches out of the beast, and is sleek enough to avoid getting pelted by bones. :P
It goes without saying, but Reptile’s favorite meal is human meat. He’ll either devour his prey while they’re still breathing, usually after battle, or he’ll kill his prey and devour them at his leisure. Reptile’s a very messy eater, and as such, rips his prey to pieces, devouring them one bloody chunk at a time. However, IF the mood strikes him, and if the prey is an average-sized human being, Reptile is actually capable of swallowing them whole, sporting a huge, rounded belly which immobilizes him, both from the weight of his gut and from just feeling so impossibly full. This is reserved for prey he truly despises, of course. Zatterans are ruthless, but Reptile is seldom NEEDLESSLY cruel like that. Beyond human meat, Reptile, being a lizard, relishes the taste of bugs and grubs…but he’ll never admit to actually quite enjoying Earthrealm fast food as well…
Reptile’s favorite beverage is water. He doesn’t particularly care for alcohol, as he despises the bitter taste, and the way his head starts to spin after a while. Water fills him up, keeps him hydrated, and he can drink gallons of it with no side effects. If he drinks TONS of water all at once, however, it will temporarily dilute the corrosive acids in his stomach, causing him to actually get bloated with water, and his normally rapid digestive juices to not be nearly as strong.
In the late 90′s, there was a live-action Mortal Kombat show called MK: Conquest. It wasn’t great, but it was interesting enough and had some really solid actors and solid fight scenes. One scene perfectly captured Reptile’s basically on a dinner date with a female Zaterran, one looking to be Reptile’s mate. And in the middle of the date, Reptile brings a bowl of bugs to his face, completely devours all the bugs by messily slurping them all down, pulls an empty bowl back down onto the table, then burps loudly and carries on as if nothing happened. No shame or embarrassment of any kind. I imagine that with Zaterrans, like Tarkattens, their species is all about the present, caring not for things like moderation, table manners or decorum. So despite being very well spoke, Reptile’s manners are non-existent. He’ll stuff his face to the brim without any shame, and in an equally shameless manner, let loose with a monstrous belch to punctuate the end of just about any meal he’s had. Between the rapid digestive juices in his belly and the vast quantity of meat Reptile consumes, the gas in his belly tends to build up a lot, often resulting in these huge, guttural burps to just explode past his lips. But unlike, say, Baraka, where just burping is gross and rude, Reptile’s burps can actually be FATAL. The acids in his stomach are just as corrosive as industrial acids; the substance used for dissolving matter. With that level of potency, if Reptile burps and a non-Zaterran is too close, the sheer quantity of acidic toxins in Reptile’s stomach gasses can actually burn someone’s lungs if inhaled. In general, Reptile’s normal burps are the wet and slimy kind, the ones that rumble out of his throat and always cause flicks of saliva to spew from his fang-filled maw. But the aftermeal burps are always these LOUD, guttural rumblers, due to the sheer amount of pressure in Reptile’s belly. Reptile tends to burp a lot when he’s had a meal that doesn’t agree with him. It just gives him serious gas and indigestion, so he’ll be in a corner groaning, just clutching his belly, regardless if it’s bloated or not, and burping again and again. If they start getting really wet, then it indicates that Reptile’s on the verge of vomiting. But if he needs to belch out bones or mechanical components, then his burps will be these HUGE, deafening belches that send bones clattering to the ground, usually flying pretty far out of his maw too. Of course, Reptile also has no shame. He’s never uttered excuse me or been embarrassed about burping around anyone, since all Zaterrans do it and he could care less about every other species. To him, it’s perfectly normal behavior, like coughing or sneezing. But a REALLY good burp, he will appreciate, usually sighing or groaning with relief and giving his belly a couple of hearty pats out of relief and satisfaction. He’ll even find amusement at how gross Earthrealmers or Outworlders may find it.
Due to just how volatile the digestive process is for Reptile, he can be prone to hiccups if he’s eaten something that doesn’t agree with him. They’re usually these loud, sharp hiccups; the kind that leave his throat burning. When they occur, Reptile gets annoyed beyond anything else. If it’s mild enough, he’ll just let it pass, hiccuping again and again, groaning with discomfort but dealing all the same. If it’s REALLY bad, then he’ll start chugging as much water as he can to cool his throat and settle the pressure on his esophagus. These are the instances when Reptile chugs enough water to actually bloat his belly into a slightly round, sloshing paunch as his digestive juices weaken. Usually after chugging so much water, Reptile will let out a big, wet burp, slap his belly, and cause the water to slosh around intensely within. In these instances, the hiccups turn to burps, because all the water sloshing around in his belly, mixed with diluted acids makes Reptile REALLY gassy, but he’s A-Okay just burping again and again since it doesn’t jolt his body or make his throat sting as much. Plus, it only lasts until his stomach acids reach full corrosive capabilities again.
Delving into Bran's character again with this one. Written all in the post text-box, so excuse any glaring typos. Or if you find them, celebrate them and take them out for dinner or something. They need love, too!
CW:
New characters! (created on the spot)
Embarrassment over hiccups and burps
Light, good-natured teasing
Based on a card game I just recently learned on Halloween
Burps and hiccups from alcoholic cider
Dan knows
Kortney is a pure and good child and will be protected at all cost so help me I'm an atheist!
Everyone knows an NB called Ren, don't say you don't; I know two!
Attempts to cure hiccups failing
My dear sweet ginger bear is dramatic and loving and I need to pay more attention to him!!
Dan is also the only non-artist in the group.
Token straight white cis man present and self-deprecating
Bran's belly should just be an additional character; that's how I see it.
It's 3am, you all. What am I doing with my life?
Bran took another gulp out of his can of cider and put it down beside him next to his cards. Around him at his card table in his apartment were three of his friends: Kortney, Ren, and Dan.
Kortney was a chubby trans woman, a Korean American adoptee, who he met in his ceramics class in college. Ren was a tall, thin, dark-skinned nonbinary artist he'd made friends with at an art show. And Dan was the token white het cis man Bran had stayed close friends with all throughout high school, one of his oldest friends.
Dan also knew, after a particularly drunken night with Bran when they were high school seniors at a house-party they'd both crashed, about Bran's 'thing' with hiccups. Though he tended to forget until Bran actually got the hiccups.
The card game was new to all of them. Bran had just picked it up from a local book shop. The artwork on each of the cards was adorable. The rules, however, were a little harder to grasp.
"Wait," Dan was saying rubbing his tawny-toned beard. The rest of Dan's hair was completely lacking in any gingery shade. Rather, he had light brown hair. But his beard was only a shade darker than Bran's bright orange one.
"So, I can't switch with one of the cards I took from someone else?" Dan continued. "Do I have to just switch two other player's cards?"
"Uh..." Bran said with a squint. "Wait a second."
"I'm so confused..." Kortney admitted as her eyes darted around to everyone else's spreads and narrowed to read the score indicators on her own cards.
"I'm pretty sure I'm losing," Ren interjected. They touched each picture on the cards in front of them. "But I really don't care, because these are so fucking cute."
Bran chuckled in response as he read from the rules. He absently took another drink from his can.
"Okay," the ginger started, "it looks like ER'RAAAUUUP! Oh gawd! Excuse me!"
Dan gave a guffaw and laugh. "Oh, is that all? Well, why didn't you say that in the first place?"
Bran giggled and shook his head, bemused. That belch had come out of nowhere! He didn't even have time to muffle it!
"Makes sense you'd be fluent in burps, Dan," Kortney said with a smile.
"You are kind of full of hot air," Ren added. They blinked lazily at him, though not unkindly.
"Okay! I get it! Gang up on the straight white guy!" he said as he held up his hands.
"You know the rules, Danny. Errp!-'scuse me, no playing the minority card in my home." Bran grinned. He suppressed yet another belch and patted his chest with a look of surprise.
Dan's grinned back. "Okay, okay. But I honestly think you're winning the whole hot air thing."
"Ugh! I know! UUUURRRP! Shit! I don't know where these things are coming from. Augh. Sorry for being so gross guys!" If he kept burping like this, Bran knew he'd get the hiccups. It was only a matter of time.
Cider didn't usually give Bran this much gas. But this was a new brand he hadn't tried, yet. He side-eyed the can wondering if there was something in it that was encouraging more of a reaction than normal.
"Okay! The rules say...yeah, when you play Mischief you can only switch two ERRUH!-sorry, ugh, two players cards, not your own," Bran said.
The artist could feel a tremor start to form in the center of his chest. He tried to swallow it down and take a deep breath. Bran liked having hiccups a lot, but he hadn't planned on being aroused during a nice card game with his friends.
"Ah, crap. Okay," Dan said, a little disappointed. He made a decision on what cards to switch between Bran and Kortney a little sullenly.
"That would make me way more upset if I knew exactly what you did by switching our cards, Dan," Kortney informed him.
"Honestly," he replied, "I'm not exactly sure what I did, either, if it makes you feel any better!"
Bran chuckled, "Okay Urp! now pass your cards Mmrrrp!-dammit, to the left, dears! Aaarup!-guh!"
Branson covered his mouth then flapped his hands dramatically, more than a little flustered as he felt the flutter in his chest get more intense. He slapped his chest a few times for good measure, though it did little to help the situation.
"Ha! You gonna be alright, B?" Ren asked.
"Yeah-no, I'm fine! Ur-up! Just exploding on the insi—Urp!-inside!" Bran's face immediately heated up with that last word. A silent hiccup had prefaced the burp. He'd broken the seal. His diaphragm was now activated.
Dan looked up at Bran's expression and his eyebrows went up when he caught his friend bounce again, another airy burp following. The ginger caught the look from his friend for a moment to confirm the reaction and looked down. The nonverbal exchange was fortunately not caught by the other two.
"It's very considerate to explode on the inside, dear," Kortney said as she pulled a card from the two that had been passed her way and put it face down in decision.
"Bran's such a people pleaser," Ren added, "that he's very tidy about exploding so he doesn't offend anyone."
The snark was completely on par with Ren's personality. Dan still mouthed 'WOW' at the deep cut.
"Okay, you Hih!URP! I did not ask Hmp!Murp! to be attacked," he paused to cover his mouth with the back of his hand as his body defied him and another diaphragm spasm brought up another airy burp, "ugh, excuse me, in my own ho-Her!Up!-ugh! Home!"
Ren was outright giggling now. Dan was staring at Bran with high brows and an amused grin. Kortney, however, was studying her cards again.
"Wait, does that mean I need two more of these ones?" she asked. No one was paying attention to the cards, though. "Aw, did you get the hiccups?"
"Hiccup-burps," Ren corrected.
"Uh...hicca-burps?" Dan asked.
"Mmm...hicburps?" Ren suggested.
"Burp-ups!" he blurted excitedly with a point to Bran.
"Ew, no," Kortney protested with a wrinkle of her nose. "That sounds too much like throwing up."
"Yeah," Ren agreed, "it kinda does."
No matter what his friends decided they were called, they were flustering the hell out of Bran as he tried holding his breath while they discussed the creation of a new word for his current condition. He'd laid a hand on his belly and now felt it bouncing under the table. Holding his breath, he discovered, didn't work when there was gas involved, apparently.
"Ugh, gawd," Bran muttered between more gassy spasms he tried to keep behind his lips, but that needed to be expelled for comfort. "I'm gonna HIP!Urk! get some water!"
"You good, man?" Dan said in sudden concern and sensitivity to Bran's situation.
"Yeah Huh!Urr! just gonna try to drown these fu-Huh!Urrup!-uh, fuckers!" Bran said. "Jeezus!"
Bran stood at his kitchen sink for a moment as he slowly drank water from a glass. Slowly, the gas started to dissipate, but the hiccups nestled in deeper. By the time Dan came over to check on him, laying a hand on his shoulder, he was all hiccups without the burps.
"Seriously, you okay?" Dan asked. Bran had to look up at him as he was about 3 inches taller.
"Yeah, ye-HUP!-yeah! The burps stopped. HU'UP!-uh, but these things are HRMP! here to stay, it seems," Bran said with an exaggerated eyeroll and shake of his head as his belly pushed into the sink in front of him again as he grunted.
"You need a moment?" the other man asked with only a hint of knowing mirth in his eyes.
Bran huffed, hiccuping, and shook his head.
"No HULP! I'm good." Bran lowered his voice to a low murmur. "Not li—ike I'm gonna HMPH'UH! start humping the ch-HIP!-chair or anything. HMP! I know you're disappointed. HU'ULP!"
Dan laughed, maybe a little too loudly.
"Eh, well, I guess I'll still hang around anyway," he said with a shrug and a smirk.
The token straight guy rubbed Bran's back again and patted it.
Bran struggled with his hiccups (and tried not to enjoy them too much) for another 5 minutes until they went away on their own. In that time, he managed to win one round, and lose another 3 to Kortney who, despite having continued confusion on the rules, miraculously won more than any of them.
