Yeah, another character from Bleach. No, I haven't developed a hyperfixation on the fandom. xD
I was just wandering around Pinterest and randomly stumbled upon this character. And wow - she's stunning.
I haven't watched the episodes with her in the anime. But aesthetically? I instantly fell in love.
She's one of my "dream archetypes". Not just some random girl, she's a truly charismatic and attractive woman. And, well... she mesmerizes me. xD
A true samurai goddess.
There's something hypnotic about personalities like hers. It makes sense though, they know they're alluring, and they use it. For playfulness, flirtation, subtle manipulation.
Maybe it's not even intentional. The charm just leaks out naturally. The world would be a lot more boring without people like that. xD
No, I haven't lost my mind (yet), I just happened to be in the mood to draw something like this.
I watched the Bleach anime a while ago, and overall I liked it.
I don't remember the fight scenes having god-tier animation, but they had something else that grabbed me. And the characters' visuals? Actually pretty dope.
Bleach has a lot of characters, and most of them feel distinct and have their own vibe. Sure, you can trace some of them back to common archetypes, but they never came across as lazy or cringe.
So yeah, I respect this anime for its cast of unique, stylish weirdos.
Byakuya Kuchiki always stood out to me both in terms of looks and personality.
What can I say about him? It's been a while since I watched Bleach, as I sad. I don't remember every lore detail. I can only speak for my feelings.
He's the embodiment of calm confidence. A dude who doesn't need to show off to radiate elegance and aristocratic energy. Like giga-chad of high society. I've always been drawn to characters like this (in games, films, books, whatever) as long as they don't come off like some generic brat swimming in gold and looking down on the peasants.
Now look at that, someone who's actually interested in us as people rather than in our knowledge about the Pyreans.
I'm replaying Enderal, and the inspiration kicked in - gotta draw the characters who stuck with me.
So, Lishari Peghast. The second female character that I remembered right from my first playthrough.
Why?
First, yeah, she's got a pretty attractive look - let's say, some hefty assets (if you know what I mean), impossible to argue with. xD
Second, the voice actor did a great job - her voice is warm, inviting, and paired with her friendly personality, it just draws you in.
She curses charmingly, reacts adorably when the MC shows interest in her personally, and not just another hired mage from Nehrim.
I decided to illustrate the first "personal" meeting with her in the tavern, when the MC really starts to get Peghast, because that scene is the first thing that pops into my head at the mention of Lishari.
And yeah, her storyline is tragically. :(
It honestly hit me hard when I reached that part - I didn't see it coming, I'll say that (I won't spoil what happens, though. Not for any better reason, just, y'know xD).
Her approachable, down-to-earth character and tragic fate - they hit hard emotionally. I remembered her, I guess forever.
She feels alive. That's a well-written character, even if she's not "mega important" story-wise.
These personal encounters with characters are such a vibe - I've felt only similar emotional connection in Baldur's Gate 3.
In Enderal, even without branching dialogue, just the flow of the conversation feels so real that you are talking to a living person.
Why? Probably because the questions and answers touch on eternal themes. As you read her question or your answer choice, you start thinking about the topic yourself, not noticing 20 minutes have passed in dialogue. Then you pick, she replies, and new thoughts emerge, new ideas. Then another answer. Another 20-minute thought loop. xD
It's awesome, I love that because, as I said before, I suffer from the "curse of overthinking". xD
So yeah, bliss. I consider Lishari a really comfortable personality to be around. Interacting with her in-game always gave me good vibes.
I played Enderal like 2-3 years ago. I don't remember every moment with her, but I do remember how I felt during those scenes. And that's worth more than dry lore facts. That's why I describe her from my emotions, not lore facts.
And now that I'm replaying Enderal, I've re-experienced those feelings.
And this time, I can capture Lishari's image in that single scene that's been etched in me since the first playthrough.
You know, Sa'Ira, you were... there for me. You accepted me, despite everything you knew about me.
Playing Enderal and, you know, I got hit by another wave of existentialism. xD
I'm just so drawn to that world - I don't know why...
A thought flashed through my head: this dying world of the game - it's so damn similar to what's happening inside me and how I see reality unfolding...
Not that illusion everyone forces on you - "society" and "life". But the real reality: vices, lack of any clear meaning, people's stupidity, the mind-boggling enormity of the universe... and that primal fear before what really lies around us. We don't fucking know anything and we never will. We're not built for that.
I once heard that life exists just to experience everything through itself... funny thought. But life can only know through its senses - and those senses are an illusion. Life can never truly know truth... yeah, it can model the world again and again, based on its senses, and that's it.
Sad? Depressing? Totally.
The writers of Enderal are geniuses, man. Their dark fantasy is utterly beautiful - from the perspective of, you know... oblivion. I'd call it "romantic death".
When everything is going to shit, but the characters, their thoughts, the events, your immersion - all of it is so mesmerizingly beautiful. Even if it's depressing.
I dig that. Why? I don't know. Maybe because I've thought too much since I was a kid. Almost can't just relax and go with the flow. This "thinker's curse" always hovers over me.
Constant reflection, thoughts, realizations of everything. It... drains all my energy. Always.
But thanks to this curse - I truly live.
And life, as we already know, is impossible without suffering. Real life.
Why am I even saying this? Oh, yeah, just wanted to share the thoughts that were inside me while playing.
In this Entry, I drew Calia, one of the possible companions and love interests of the protagonist. This is the moment when the MC enters the medical ward after the "Journey to the Water".
I... really like her. I'd even say I'm in love with her archetype.
I understand I'll never get someone like Lae'zel in real life. I'm just not the kind of person she'd respect or even notice (though I really enjoy that character).
But Calia... she's different.
She also prefers being alone to focus on her goals. Even though she's powerful - love, compassion, kindness are not foreign to her.
Despite her distance, she's deeply empathetic.
We're a lot alike. In real life it'd be so interesting to be with someone like her.
Her thoughts - they're familiar to me.
That's why when I reached her story arc in the game - I had this strong drive to draw her.
I literally stopped playing. I couldn't focus on anything else until I sketched her. I had to capture her with my hands.
A small tribute to true sci-fi horror - Dead Space.
I deeply respect Dead Space 1 for its atmosphere of cosmic uncertainty, that feeling of holding your breath every time you open yet another door. I respect it for the masterful body-horror art style. I respect the diegetic interface that pulls you even deeper into immersion.
Necromorphs will forever stay in horror history as these... ungraspable things - once human, now transformed into some kind of freakshow monstrosities, waiting to devour you in the claustrophobic hallways of the Ishimura.
Even without detail, the silhouette of a necromorph is instantly recognizable. Now that's what I call solid visual design.
Entry #13 - "You Are No Bounty Hunter... You Are..."
Death... Straight up.
Well then, the gloomy marathon continues. xD
This time, coming for you is... Death itself.
The best "villain" in the whole DreamWorks movies.
The voice acting is just perfection. That brilliantly ominous whistling before he shows up... chef's kiss.
And his design? Absolute banger. There are literally no other words. Just banger.
That's what I love about DreamWorks. They know how to hit different people with the same story. They made a legit terrifying character... in a children's movie. And no, I wouldn't call myself impressionable, but this Death? Gives you the creeps, no lie. There's this slow, eerie anxiety that crawls over your skin when he's on screen.
And that's just us viewers. Imagine what it felt like for Puss in the movie...
That's exactly the kind of reaction a concept like "Death" should evoke.
It's untouchable, undefinable. It just is. A constant, inevitable presence that will always, always instill fear. Because death cannot be truly understood - and we humans are still animals deep down. We fear what we can't understand.
So how did I end up choosing this particular character?
Yesterday I randomly stumbled across an edit, you know, one of those moody YT shorts, and there he was. That one scene. The vibe was so thick with inevitability, I just couldn't hold back. I knew Entry #13 had to be him.
I love when an Entry is born from a rush of actual emotion.
And not some weak emotional sneeze, but the real shit - fear.
Yeah, fear's uncomfortable. You can't live properly with it (trust me, I'd know). But in art? Fear is fuel. Nuclear fuel.
There's honestly nothing more powerful than fear. It's primal. Evolution owes it everything.
Anyway, I just hope that, when the time comes, Death won't bully me like he did Puss. I hope he just shows up... and quietly takes me away. xD
Time to finally draw at least one actual god from TES.
Why Sithis?
Well, I mean... I came across that statue reference and it just looked so damn beautiful and epic. I had to put it on paper.
No grand backstory behind this Entry. I just got pulled back into TES lore and thought, "okay, what should I sketch this time...".
Went through a bunch of characters in my head, and landed on Sithis.
The Dread-Father. The Soul-Father of Lorkhan. Embodiment of chaos. Destruction. The Void. Oblivion. Basically... what I feel like after a full workday. xD
Now, technically Sithis is just personified absence. Stagnation. Fear. But damn, he's terrifying, isn't he? The way he's written in the lore really captures that primal horror - the dread of confronting something truly unknown.
If I imagined myself as a regular mortal in Tamriel, Sithis would honestly be horrifying.
The whole idea that this unknowable metaphysical force exists - and that it's literally impossible to understand it - is maddening.
So to stay sane, we give it a face. We shape it into a god. Something we can comprehend.
Because if it has an image, it has borders. And if it has borders, then we can make peace with it.
But a pure force of oblivion? The law of the void? That's panic fuel.
Still, it's gods like this that I find most interesting in lore. At least for me.
Now if we drop the whole "how mortals perceive Sithis" and switch into lore-nerd mode for a sec.
Sithis isn't just some spirit or weird metaphysical entity like the Et'Ada. He's literally a law.
Sithis is the soul of one of the primordial forces that gave birth to "The Dream" of the TES universe. And yeah, that's kinda insane when you stop to think about it. xD
But even though he's a "soul", he doesn't function like a being. He's not a character. He's a principle. The reason things can vanish. The reason there can be emptiness. The reason fear even exists as a counterbalance to peace.
You can't have fullness without emptiness. You can't feel safety without something to be afraid of. That's Sithis. A fundamental metaphysical function.
And it's this incomprehensible, monstrous, universal weight that draws me in.
The fear of the unknown. The fear of facing a law so far beyond you, it turns your thoughts to dust.
And yet... you still want to understand it. You still want to look directly into that void.
That's the human curse - the drive to reach into the fire of knowledge, even if it means burning yourself to ash.
So yeah, no dramatic "this Entry changed my life" story this time. xD
Just a sketch, and a bit of lore-rambling about the most terrifying law the TES universe has to offer.
I started watching Castlevania and instantly vibed with the whole aesthetic. Maxed-out dark fantasy, a touch of Victorian mood, and all that gothic drama.
And of course - Trevor Belmont and his whip. Seriously, that thing is peak weapon design. Whoever invented it deserves a damn monument.
Spinning it, building momentum, striking - it just looks beautiful. And well, I love beautiful things. xD
So yeah, I wanted to capture that fight - Belmont vs Alucard.
Two styles, two energies. One is tension and attack. The other is calm and aristocratic, almost bored. Whip vs sword. Movement vs stillness.
This one was a real composition challenge - trying to convey dynamic motion in a single still frame. But it actually turned out more interesting than I expected. The whole process was pure joy.
Entry #10 - "I Want You… Literally. All The Parts"
When she looked at me - I felt the human inside me die.
And the toy awaken.
Continuing to sketch characters that stuck with me from Baldur's Gate 3.
This time it's Orin - "hehe psycho gf" on full throttle. xD
The epitome of obsession with violence and simultaneous elegance.
Incredible character, brilliantly written and acted. In real life I wouldn't say I'm really into that kind of personality in girls. But hey, no one said you can't fantasize a little, right? xD
And there is ash beside me.
And above - the moon.
And within - silence.
That finally does not frighten.
This Entry came together super spontaneously.
I came home tired after a trip and just wanted to draw. Didn't matter what. Just draw.
I scrolled through some art for a while, and suddenly something Morrowind-related popped up - and I was like: "that's it!"
And so I ended up sketching a little Morrowind landscape.
I love that part of TES, I think it's the best in the whole series. The lore, the atmosphere, the artstyle - all of it is so cool (well, yeah, and also because Kirkbride was the lead designer xD).
While I was scratching at the paper, I caught myself thinking - here I am, vibing at night, nodding to some of my favorite tracks, drawing art for one of my favorite games. Just... pure enjoyment, rest, wish I could do this every day. xD
This Entry really stuck with me as one of the most vibe-heavy ones in terms of the process. Drawing landscapes is nothing like drawing characters. No need to stress about anatomy or go "wait, does this even look normal? Or did I once again accidentally draw some anatomical abomination?". xD
It was like a trance - I just gave in to the process and scratched out some rocks, distant dwemer ruins, a silt strider somewhere out there, waaah. The images just kept flowing from my mind, and my hand was doing its best to keep up.
Entry #8 was originally supposed to be "Sotha Sil from Morrowind".
Yeah, I wanted to sketch that scene, you know, when the Nerevarine finally reaches the Clockwork City... and that bitch Almalexia had already killed him.
But then, while I was chilling before starting the sketch, I heard that "bad and boujee x butterfly remix". And, well, my mood flipped real fast. xD
Some genius mashed up two genius tracks and boom - club vibe instantly. Exactly the kind of mood I like. xD
So while that song was on loop, my brain immediately went: Velvet Velour from Vampire The Masquerade Bloodlines.
She's such a cool character (and no, not just because she's a sexy stripper... okay, partly, yeah xD).
I just remember her look, voice, the atmosphere during her scenes, the feel of her club. I dunno, she just left a mark.
Honestly, I love VTMB. Cool game. I should probably replay it.
It cracks me up how my brain pendulums between "I wanna sketch death, decay, and void" to "horny artist moment". xD
The second my mood slides in one direction, bam, all previous plans are gone.
So instead of sketching a dead false god tangled in his own wires... I'm out here drawing a sexy stripper vampire goddess on a pole.
Sketching this Entry was a full-on dopamine hit. Another waifu immortalized. VV, you're forever in my heart. xD
I've been looking over all my finished Entries, and yeah - they're all different. The mood in each one shifts.
Why?
Probably because these Entries are everything I've always had inside me - clawing to get out. And I just didn't know how to show it before.
Or maybe I was scared. Dumbass. Thought I wasn't "artist".
And everyone around me always reinforced that: "You're a tech guy. You're not creative". Blah blah blah, that whole load of bullshit.
But I've always wanted to scream about my feelings. Not with words. Or not just with words. I wanted to scream in forms. In images. In visual noise.
And now, with the awakening of Zaissk - I finally can.
(and yeap, there's a blob on the paper, it's pure chance xD).
Sotha Sil. The false god-engineer. A traitor to his friend. A romantic, trying to build perfection, to dissect the universe piece by piece and find the ultimate "truth" And just a plain ol' dwemer enjoyer. xD
After the heavy Entry #6, I decided to treat myself with something more "lightweight".
So I chose to sketch Sotha Sil, how he looked in ESO, before he got killed by that whore Almalexia in Morrowind.
I really like this character. Incredibly well written, with a beautifully tragic fate.
Honestly, I love Morrowind. I love TES lore. And Kirkbride - don't get me started. The man is pure inspiration when it comes to visual storytelling. xD
And this character? He's one of Kirkbride's. Just like the whole Tribunal. Seriously, some of the best characters in the entire TES lore (yes, even that bitch Almalexia).
After binging the entire first season of Arcane, I was soooo fucking impressed.
The sound, visuals, characters, expressions, all the little details - holy shit, such amazing work. Hats off to the creators.
While I was watching, I got hit with some The Walking Dead and The Wolf Among Us vibes from Telltale Games.
Also yeah, found myself some new crushes xD (Caitlyn, please marry me xD). What an incredibly attractive character. Like, "what if aristocracy was trained in hand-to-hand combat". xD
Vi and Jinx are great too, but not as much as Caitlyn. She's on another level.
The style of Arcane is just chef's kiss. Gave me flashbacks to Dishonored, Bioshock, and Cyberpunk 2077.
This series can LITERALLY be broken down frame by frame for sketching inspiration. Or rewatched purely to soak up the atmosphere. It's that amazing.
One thing that really stuck with me? The Undercity club scenes.
Fucking hell.
It's like Cyberpunk and Telltale Games had a sweaty, neon-lit baby. xD
Seriously though, the music choices, the sound design, the visual framing, the camera work - it gave me the same feeling I had when listening to "XO - Night Time Solace" while sketching Mizora.
I'm not into nightlife or real clubs, but aesthetically? I'm obsessed.
Chances are very high I'll do an Entry with Caitlyn or other Arcane characters. But that's for later.
Being so damn impressed with the Undercity club scenes and a track like "Playground", I decided to scratch out my own interpretation of a nightclub - complete with blackjack and courtesans, of course.
That's how Entry #6 was born.
It was while doing this Entry that I really realized how tricky hatching can be. It looks like a simple technique, but holy hell, using it properly is a whole-ass skill.
At first, I actually wanted to show both Zaun as a whole (like some dark alleyway and the bar "The Last Drop"), but ditched the idea.
I chose to focus on the vibe inside the club - the kind of place people crawl into to drown in sin and base desires.
I remember my first attempt - I spent the entire night on it. xD
Fucked up a bunch and tried to fix the bar counter without redrawing the whole damn piece (and hey, I pulled it off).
I especially love the "multi-tiered" layout of the club.
One level below: the poor souls caught in the hypnotic seduction of the "girls". And oh boy, the girls are more than happy to drain those men of their coin.
At the very top: the nun-mama, watching over her party.
(yeah, she turned out looking like a nun by accident - I wasn't planning that xD - but she's hot so I'm not mad).
Further down: regular folks trying to hide from themselves in the dark.
Almost the whole club is drowned in shadow, as it should be. No need to show every lost soul in detail.
All the light focuses on the main sin and the main characters - the girls and their tits. Because yes. That's where it should be.
I think I captured my feelings about places like this pretty damn well.
This was a tough, long Entry (took 3 days!) but every second spent was worth it.
So, this is that Entry - the one I finished right before creating this Tumblr account.
The posts are slowly catching up to reality. xD
Why the delay between the finished Entries and posting them? Well, reality doesn't exactly give Zaissk time to peacefully scratch on paper and pour thoughts out.
I still remember the mood I was in when I decided to sketch Mizora - I wanted to punch everyone in the face. xD
Exhausted and pissed off from the endless deadlines - study, work, life... the usual hell.
And what do you want to draw when you're in that kind of mood, besides maybe your manager's public execution? xD
Exactly - ultra-feminine, seductive, dominant demon lady (yes, Mizora, step on me, I beg you xD).
There's this track: "XO - Night Time Solace". I sketched parts of this Entry while it was playing.
It's literally her soundtrack, no discussion. xD
When you hear it, you're mentally teleported into a nightclub - but not the cheap kind. The kind where lust isn't shouted at you, but whispered. Fluid, ambient, like pheromones sprayed into the air. Everyone's enchanted, entranced.
Every movement is deliberate. Slow. Hypnotic. The world fades and leaves only sensation. Wild. Forbidden.
That vibe - that's what made it so satisfying to draw Mizora.
And I really love capturing what I call "predatory femininity" in poses. xD
The way the body curves. The arms. The way the light kisses the hips and chest.
(please don't call the cops, I swear I'm just appreciating aesthetics xD).
I'm just genuinely drawn to the beauty of the female form.
And it's like... intuitively, I tend to emphasize the elements I find the most striking in whatever I'm drawing.
In Mizora's case - that's the legs, the chest, and the wings.
Those are the things that grab me, so I try to pull the viewer's attention toward them too. To make you feel what I felt.
The legs in this Entry stand out the most - because, let's be honest, they're sexy as hell. That pose? It's all about showing off those thighs.
Sure, the face and hands are nice and all, but those legs, that chest, those wings - that's her power combo. xD
The legs lure you in. The chest makes you stay. And the wings? They remind you she's not just a hot succubus - she's a powerful, manipulative demon.
So, for a while I kept wondering - where the hell should I start building my "showcase"?
There were a few contenders.
Of course, the pop king itself - Instagram (how could we exist without this colossus of all things shiny and visual).
But that one felt... too glossy, too polished. Definitely not the right place for my scribbled ravings of a madman.
Considered DeviantArt. Seemed like a cool idea - a social network for artsy souls. But it felt either completely dead or just... ultra-niche. Didn't vibe with me.
Pinterest? lol. I didn't even bother to treat it seriously.
It's more like a lifeless warehouse full of reference material for other lost souls seeking inspiration. Not my scene either.
And then... that's it.
Turns out, Tumblr is the only halfway decent place left for this kind of thing.
Maybe there are other fancy "portfolio" platforms out there. But I don't just want to show my art - I want to ramble, whine, overshare. You know - the whole Zaissk experience. xD
Now, a bit of background on Entry #4.
I showed up at my brother's place - he's an actual artist - flexing my newborn sketching adventures.
He looked at one and goes: "looks like a deranged lunatic is trying to draw... but there's style. There's vibe".
That's a pretty accurate description, I think. xD
We ended up talking about the holy grail basics - those ancient runes every art student is cursed to hear at least once in life:
hatching, shading, half-tones, light sources, form, volume, perspective, proportions... you know, academia stuff.
And I suddenly got fired up to do some good ol' cube-and-sphere bootcamp - work on technique, lay some groundwork.
But I didn't wanna sink into full-on academic depression, so I decided to give these "primitives" some story.
The initial idea was: I'd draw the Astral Plane - scattered eyeballs of dead gods floating around (as spheres), with cubes and cylinders as shattered remnants of ancient structures.
Solid enough. So I sat down and started.
First sphere? Done. Hatched it properly, just like the holy books say.
Then came the next one... and boom - divine epiphany:
"Wait, these kinda look like eyes, ripping through the fabric of reality, gazing... at whoever's looking at the this art".
And that was it. Down the rabbit hole we go.
Suddenly I was sketching eyeballs.
Then I wanted some movement - so I threw in cosmic streams cutting through space. And then I realized... the streams and eye placement looked like a giant parasite.
It looked so sick I had to keep it. My hand said: "no more dead god ruins - today, we birth a cosmic parasite that stares into your soul". xD
So I doubled down on the eye motif. Drew them from different angles, slashing open space itself.
Yeah, it’s surreal.
I was honestly kinda shook by the end. That whole mess somehow formed a semi-coherent lore by accident.
Clearly, the god of art itself hijacked my body. No other explanation. xD
Today I'm here to tell you how I won my rematch against... the portrait (after the glorious "caricature" that was Entry #2).
Armed with new experience and fresh awareness of the mistakes I should absolutely not repeat (like whiskey-glass head, little lips, bottom-jaw "beard" shadow, and ears sent by some forgotten god), I grabbed my pen and ink and sat down right after some "Very Important Real Life Tasks".
And it started great. The face shape worked from the get-go, the ears came out satisfying instantly, and the lips? Damn, they were a win on the first try too. I was overflowing with determination.
And this time I sketched the face at an angle - just because I could. And maybe also because I like to throw in extra challenges for myself (as if I don't already have enough going on, lol).
The eyes were a bit more stubborn this time. At first, the left one was sitting too low and tilted weirdly. But the magic of fixing fuckups with shadows worked again, and you'd never know anything went wrong looking at the final version.
I managed to capture her expression and essence through that gaze, and honestly, that was my main goal - to seal her character into the lines and forms. To make her feel real. And also - to finally erase the memory of the cringe caricature I summoned in Entry #2 xD (before I drowned it in ink like a guilty secret).
I'm not gonna lie - when I finished this one, I nearly jumped out of my seat. I loved what I'd made.
That rush? That confidence boost? Huge.
It reminded me: I can sketch. And I will, damn it. I'll keep sketching until my fingers fall off.
I remember how, after finishing my first Entry, I was sitting there thinking: Do I even need to share this stuff? Should I start a normie Instagram account? Or maybe there's some better place for this kind of thing - where someone just posts their weird little creations and shares what they were feeling while making them, what thoughts were bouncing around, what kind of message, if any, is hiding in there.
So, naturally, I went to ask a AI xD (who else, right?).
And boom - it spat out: Tumblr. I barely knew what that even was. Just that it was some kind of blog platform, maybe a social network, I guess? Turns out, I was kinda right. But it's got a twist: Tumblr's always been this chaotic, creative, kinda unhinged (in a good way) space. It's always been home to weird, and soulful people.
Basically: perfect.
But I didn't make the account right after Entry #1. Only did it four days ago.
Was I gathering my thoughts? Maybe. But mostly? Life hit (You know, work, study. That stuff).
Still, even without a Tumblr account, I kept drawing. Almost daily. Sure, sometimes I took breaks - I'm still a flesh sack full of meat, and I need rest. And I refuse to turn sketching into some chore, or some monetization hamster wheel. I've already made that mistake with coding and motion design.
Tumblr feels like the opposite of all that. You just... post stuff. Maybe someone sees it and gets energized. Maybe you get energized in return. And that's beautiful.
So. Let's talk Entry #2.
At first, I was like: "Hell yeah, second drawing of my entire life? It's gonna be a portrait of Lae'zel! xD" (Yes, I really do love this character that much).
I was hyped. Confident.
At first it went okay. Face shape, decent. Eyes? Getting there. Nose? Check. The lines were flowing. But really, it was all just my delusional confidence talking. xD
I even have this ancient artifact - the half-done face - in awful quality, but hey.
Then I started staring at the drawing. The face was... too wide. Like a whiskey glass. The lips were tiny and weird. The jaw? Let's not even talk about the jaw.
But the eyes... oh man. That gaze I managed to capture? It was magic. Straight-up soul-stabbing. Disappointed. Judgmental. Like she was mad at me, for butchering her face. xD
Which is... honestly very Lae'zel. I love it. I still get chills when I look at that gaze.
And then... I got scared. Too scared to draw the other half of the face. xD
I was terrified I'd ruin it. That I'd mess up the second eye and have to either patch it up with ink sorcery... or restart completely.
See, I sketch directly in ink. No pencil. No outlines. No cheat codes. One try. One shot. No mercy.
And it helps - I can't erase anything. So I have to commit. I'm here to express, not to chase some imaginary "perfection".
Anyway, I eventually wrestled that fear to the ground and finished the second half of the face xD (You wouldn't believe the anxiety).
And the second eye? Turned out awesome. Like, sexually-charged-gaze awesome. I don't know how else to put it. xD
This is how the "finished" version looked. It was super cringe, but like... my cringe. My sacred cringe. So back off. xD
I spent some time just staring at it, wondering how to salvage the mess I made of my queen.
Then I made a decision - just flood everything in ink. Except the gaze. Leave that intact.
You've seen the final version already. I left Entry #2 alone after that. That wild, feral, predatory gaze - it was unmistakably Lae'zel. Zaissk approved. xD
Anyway, this has been a mini-story about how I simply could not go on living after accidentally creating a caricature of my favorite character. xD
And how I made the executive decision to drown the bad parts in ink - while preserving what mattered most: the gaze.
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