Before messaging me about Skylar,
I am breathing. I am living. I have been alive for 20 years. I wake up every day, listen to music. Eating cookies nonstop all day, drinking San Pellegrino, cheesecake in the fridge.
Many people have pictures with Skylar posting them to social media. I have my own photographs with Skylar prior to Skylar and I becoming ourselves. I love those photographs. Theyâre mine and his, both of us mutually. If I do not consent to those photos being posted in full then Skylar certainly wouldnât have either.
I have aspirations and goals in my life.
Skylar was a large part of my life from when I was 3 years of age until I moved away at 18 years. I watched Skylar grow: first words, teaching xir how to use a computer and internet. We hid in the closets (physically and expression wise) together. We both came out of them on our own respective terms.
Hold onto that message before sending it to me.
You had Skylar for yourselves entirely that one and half year I was not there. Growing up I had Skylar at home, when we went out for waffles on Sundays, playing at the parks. At many points all I had was xir and him only.
Blue is my favourite colour.
You do not know me. Do not treat me any less than you would to another person because I am living. I am not invisible in the world, I am physically present.
I am trans. I am nonbinary. I am queer.
I will not say âtooâ after all of those because my identity and life is valid. Do not tag on âtooâ to your words when relating Skylar and I. We are two individuals who came out on our own terms. Is it unusual that two siblings would both be trans and queer? Probably. Yet we both always were. No âtooâ for that.
If trans lives are beautiful when theyâre alive start treating them like they are than wait until they die to lament about the state of the world. Some of the worst responses from all of this has come from the trans and queer community. Prodding for answers regarding Skylarâs death, the gossip and assumptions, theyâre disgusting.
Skylar had all the friends, support, help and resources in the world.
He couldnât see them because thatâs what depression does to you.
It clouds your ability to think and judge a situation rationally.
Trans Lifeline: http://www.translifeline.org/ US: (877) 565-8860
We are siblings. That does not mean I am inherently at will to repeat the same actions as my brother. To even remotely say so in any form disregards my humanity, my life experiences, my struggles and happiness, and says that I am not valid as a person.
If you want to use me as a resource to get what you want then leave it at that, do not masquerade your actions with false words of âcareâ and âconcernsâ. I will respond to all of them because thatâs how I am. If youâd like to genuinely talk then state that.
That said I will get a cup of hot apple cider with any who need it or want it.
Cheers and self care to you all, happy winter.
Tumblr is a really weird place, I get weird messages from people here, the LGBTQ community here is rather appalling for a place that touts inclusive and healthy behaviour. I am real, I am valid, I am human. Take time for self care. Apple cider is delicious and I like to share.
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