local lesbo @1-perpetual-stew - Tumblr Blog

My dog passed away almost a month ago and one thing I really miss is the feeling of a small dog curled up against you under the blanket as they softly snore. I miss that

#I miss my poor boy #he used to burrow himself between my legs and do his old man sigh before closing his eyes and sleeping #it makes me really sad that I'm never going to feel that again. bc even if I get another small dog it's never gonna be him #:(#vent #pet loss

This blog was originally meant to be something sappy and sweet and hopelessly romantic because at my heart, I AM a hopeless romantic that adores love.

But, at the same time... I have grown so BORED of it. It is not fulfilling. I've tried to meet new people and each time I'm hit with this overwhelming sense that they're simply not worth the effort, that I'm tired and don't want to do this anymore. It's a strange feeling that feels like it goes against who I am because for a long, long time I was the sort of person who blushed and giggled at the idea of kissing someone or cradling into my partner's neck, I was the dork who would say cringe pet names such as "pretty" and spend hours making gifts for the people I loved. But now I find people too exhausting, not worth the effort, and the thought of dating someone, kissing someone, telling someone I LOVE them feels almost humiliating and so disgusting to me.

I can't tell if it's personal growth or a decay of something that was so big in my life. I don't know how to get that feeling back, and honestly I don't care THAT much to try and get it back.

#vent #does this make sense #lgbt

1-perpetual-stew

I don't know who I'm doing this for anymore. It's not for myself. This isn't what I want. So what is compelling me to do these things that feel tedious, monotonous, and so unsatisfying? What do I want?

1-perpetual-stew

This was about my accounting degree but I've actually begun to take enjoyment in it :) I enjoy learning about taxes n stuff. So that's nice

#everything else though...

I think this is going to kill me at some point. Oh my God.

#I feel so bad #my chest aches so much #I can't keep doing this #I want to reach out to someone but all I've done is complain lately #everything keeps going wrong and I keep complaining #and that's so exhausting to be around. fuck I'M exhausted of hearing it. why would I subject the people I love to that???#suicide tw #mental illness sucks

1-perpetual-stew

Sometimes I don't really process how stressed I am but lately. Ough. It's getting to me

1-perpetual-stew

Top hashtag on this is about how I've been in an elaborate lie and it may bite me... I think I got away w it scotch free???? My chest feels like it's about to cave in on itself ough

#so nervous but like if I can skirt by this it'll be SO FREEING #don't lie abt getting better kids this shit fucks you UP

Been feeling bad for about 3-ish months and the few times I've opened up about it nobody ever says "I'm sorry you feel so bad, I'm here for you and you're not alone." Instead it's just "I'm sorry that sucks :( I wish I could help :( maybe go take a shower :(" like yay ok thx

#it is NOT anyone's job to fix me. so I don't rlly hold it against anyone or use it against them #but fuck. I just want someone to show me they care

sev-arts

cooler lesbian comix than the one youre probably talking about

Ya girl is going to a Fae Festival this month and is trying to convince her friends to go to the Maryland Renaissance Festival in October 😚

#so excited #I'm going to the Fae Festival as a purple dragonfly fairy :D #I may post pics #lesbian #ren faire #lgbt #wlw #fae festival

1-perpetual-stew

Just bought a soulmate reading for shits and giggles. I have zero faith in it but I ong have nothing else going on in my life rn so why the hell not

1-perpetual-stew

Apparently I'll meet my soulmate early/mid 2027 at a social event.... We shall see

#I do not go out to social events much so... interesting...

Just bought a soulmate reading for shits and giggles. I have zero faith in it but I ong have nothing else going on in my life rn so why the hell not

#twas like $20 but that seemed pretty cheap for a reading idk #gonna get my stuff back in the next day or two. may update

forsapphics

all the cool girls are lesbians

I don't know who I'm doing this for anymore. It's not for myself. This isn't what I want. So what is compelling me to do these things that feel tedious, monotonous, and so unsatisfying? What do I want?

#staring at my class lineup for the next year and just... who am I doing this for exactly #this is a very unsatisfying life #I need a change #vent #vent post

Getting to the point in life I just constantly feel restless. I feel so suffocated all the time

#what is this feelinggggg

nerd-at-sea5

and yk what. we as a lesbian society need to start saying dyke more.

lezdykebitch

Looking at the state my country is in always leaves me feeling such an intense sense of despair. Life doesn't feel worth living here

#there's always something bad happening. I'm so tired of being in a country where it feels like nothing good happens #ik it's bad pretty much everywhere but. fuck. what's the point in life if you'll just be afraid as billionaires try to kill you for profit #vent #suicide tw #us politics

Thinking about how I always feel like I'm falling behind in life and look at my best friend and see someone with her shit together and moving more ahead than me, only for her to admit she feels the exact same way about her own life and sees ME as the person with my shit together and moving ahead. It's rlly about perspective huh

#spoiler alert: neither of us have our shit together LMAO

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