LifeLessMoon

These are my days, these are my thoughts, these are ups, the downs, my highs and lows. This is me!

[tasteslikeparadise]

black and white

[49ergirl]

[49ergirl]

I feel lost......

[originalthree]

[misscegenation]

I started tearing up just looking at the stills.

Dang it.

[fostering-possibilities]

Love this….

[49ergirl]

Melted my heart... Our love story!

[fostering-possibilities]

…. A friend posted this on FB….. I found it extremely appropriate….

[49ergirl]

I'm tired of being brave!

[the-baby-adventures]

[49ergirl]

I'm not brave

Sometimes I can't hold back my tears... With everyday comes the thought of why cant I be a mother, why cant we start a family... I hate it! Its like a war within myself, leaving no survivors. I cant keep the tears from falling. So i lock my thoughts in this private box full of tears that is my heart. I can't handle this fight on my own yet I sit here on the bathroom floor and i let the tears fall. Turn the radio up, he'll never know the pain I am feeling. Wash your face its time to be brave. Everyday you must be brave, they dont get to know your pain, for they will never understand it anyway! Its too hard, why is life always so hard? I'm not brave... I want to scream for the whole world to hear I'M NOT BRAVE!!! I'm dying inside. I am a lifeless moon!

[49ergirl]

The power of lyrics

http://youtu.be/FSAYkdAdV-w

When this song comes on Pandora... I can't keep my eyes from tearing up... stirs up so many emotions.. the power of lyrics

[49ergirl]

Sometimes I feel so connected to music.. like it literally pulls my thoughts out of my head and puts a beat to them...

[who-stole-my-chicken]

[sakurakoy-deactivated20150301]

[49ergirl]

Last night was one of those nights where I lie awake for hours past my bed time.. thinking about my regrets from that one moment in time. People always post quotes about how they have no regrets blah blah blah everything was a learning experience, but you know what.. I call bullshit! What if one decision in your life could have altered the life of someone elses? What if that on decision you made didn't just change your life but hundreds of lives around you? Would you regret i...t then?  Its easy to say you regret nothing.. to post a quote “Live life with no regrets” but its never that easy to follow your own mission statement is it?  I often think about how my life and so many others would be different had I done things differently 20 years ago.. but that’s the problem with regret you cant change the choices that you made, all you can do is reflect on them, and play them out differently in your mind when no one is watching. Unfortunately my day will always consist of what if I had done this.. what if I were there on time.. what if we never met.. all these what if’s………. so I guess the what if’s are my reminder, that my actions not only effect my life but the lives of people I love around me. I'm not usually one to post this type of stuff but sometimes its hard to pretend like everything is okay to make others feel comfortable. So here is my sleep deprived ramble...

[49ergirl]

I feel so incredibly blessed to have such an awesome friend who sends me random gifts in mail! You always know just how to brighten my day @lhanna thanks P.I.C. for the thoughtful gift! Sorry I had to tell the world how awesome you are! #neverselfish #partnerincrime #bff #payitforward #PIC #purpleroses

[looptylaala]

May The Lines Be Ever In Your Favor! Let’s not give up ladies!! Stand Strong!!

[49ergirl]

Got to have my nephew for a sleep over 😊 my ❤️ is full! I love spending time with this lil guy! Finally feel like a real auntie! Last night in excitement Robby said "Mona your da best!" And then my ❤️ just melted!

[alackofoxygen-deactivated202004]

[verticallyfrustrated]

I don’t know if you guys know this or not but the girl and the sailor didn’t even know each other, the sailor was drunk and sexually assaulted her in the street and they got off the boat. history lesson. boom.

[saltwaterheals]

UM

NO

THAT’S NOT WHAT HAPPENED

Upon hearing the news that the war was over, everyone was celebrating in the streets. The sailor was overwhelmed with the joy of the moment and grabbed a nurse and kissed her before they parted ways. She didn’t see it as a sexual assault, she understood that everyone was celebrating. And it certainly wasn’t simply a drunken act.

Stop trying to ruin this picture. It captures the joy of the end of a really awful time. 

[majomaru]

If I’m not mistaken, these two remain friends to this day. 

[oldfrax]

You aren’t mistaken, they visit each other and their families and exchange christmas cards.

And this is him now:

[notyouraverageitgirl-deactivate]

GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT PEOPLE. LORD

[49ergirl]

Miles and Miles to no where!

Today is one of those days... I would love to just crawl back into my bed and hide under the covers! I feel so incredibly lost in this world. Bills keep piling up, time just keeps slipping away. I spend 1,920 hours of my life each year working just to survive. Sad I've never done the math until now.. That's 1,920 hours spent being miserable surrounded by a good portion of people I can't stand!

This is what makes it so easy to dream about winning the lotto..

My life is passing me by. I feel like I'm not really living it.. I'm just a spectator watching from the sidelines. While my friends start families.. buy their first home.. start their own business.. and here I am waiting in line to buy my ticket to the big show called life!

How did I get here? I thought getting sober and changing my life was the key to happiness.. at least when I was high I felt on top of the world. 13 years of sobriety I still have nothing to show for it.. other than being over weight.. broke.. and kidless. Where is the light at the end of my tunnel. This tunnel goes on... and on never ending... miles and miles to nowhere.