i try so hard

cool it with the shrimp, buddy

[5280ft]

discord: 5280fts (dont forget the S! i’m more likely to see your message on tumblr tho so if you sent me a frq and i haven’t responded feel free to dm me here :))

ao3: 5280ft

social security number: 663-88-997423

i go inactive sporadically but i will always crawl back. ❤️

[5280ft]

we really moved on too fast from smack barm pey wet

[5280ft]

babby’s yed as well

[5280ft]

we really moved on too fast from smack barm pey wet

[glubby]

Wait i can learn from my mistakes? Ohhhhh ok i was just using them to torment myself

[nonexistent-triangle]

the irredeemable pervert is generally well regarded among their friends for their insightful thoughts and all around pleasant demeanour

[490hertz]

i identify so much with this

[papasmoke]

How committed are you to embarrassing yourself online?

im ready to die for this

[5280ft]

*moves diagonally towards you*

[treecitysessions]

Text I got from my guy friend who’s currently dating a man for the first time when I asked him how it’s going

[treecitysessions]

I heavily fw bro

[fairycosmos]

LOL my one fleeting singular life

[auckie]

[hungwy]

[kingcatnine]

dude my croissant bill is through the roof this month (world where it's standard for houses to have a faucet that dispenses croissants)

[circlusion]

[5280ft]

i’m lowkey evil but it’s in a like vegeta way where my nefarious characteristics have ultimately been relegated to comic relief due to antagonistic power creep so it’s fine. i am also a manlet in a vegeta-inspired way

[5280ft]

if i am not taken to funkytown soon there is going to be a big problem

[lhavdil]

a hometown is a type of dead wife

[5280ft]

we know what morrisey said about looking for a job and then finding a job but did he ever know about when you have a job but you’re also still looking for a job. i bet if he did he would have killed himself before he could write a song about it