constantly trying to see the inherent good in people is a humiliation ritual that i continue to willingly participate in
will byers stan first human second
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@freshwitchgladiator
constantly trying to see the inherent good in people is a humiliation ritual that i continue to willingly participate in
The thing is. I would eat the grapes. I would eat the pomegranate seeds. I would eat the Turkish delights. It doesn’t matter what the stakes are if you put a little plate of snacks out in front of me I’ll eat them.
If you sent me to an evil fantasy realm and told me that if I ate anything I would die a painful terrible death then set a charcuterie board down in front of me that would be it for me. Like it wouldn’t even be like a torturous internal struggle to not eat the cheese. I wouldn’t even need to be that hungry.
atheists call it project hail darwin
agnostics call it project hail maybe
Unitarians call it project hail whatever
Movement nudge, for hands and wrists!
X
posting this with every artist tag i can think of, even if you dont do crochet, PLEASE TAKE RESTS FOR YOUR HANDS!!! no matter what medium artist you are, take care of your articulations
tuesday status?
yup. its tuesday 👍
copy. tuesday confirmed ✅ engaging tuesday protocol
at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you
at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.
at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly
at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.
at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.
At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.
kids were roleplaying with minecraft figurines and one of them had their figure go up to the other and say “i’m in love with you” and the other one replied “sword slash to the chest. and you’re on fire”
I told a guy his total was 13.21 and he said “wish it were that year, could actually get some good music on the radio”
breaking news from the AP, our boys on the front have just sacked constantinople. take that, heretics. coming up next are the soothing lute dirges of bing crosby
*screams of a witch burning at the stake*
THOU ART CURRENTLY LISTENING TO
*Gregorian chanting*
13.21
*leper bell ringing*
HIGH MEDIAEVAL FM
*recording of John Lackland sobbing as he signs the Magna Carta*
WHENCE COMETH NAUGHT BUT LITURGIES
LITURGIES
AND MORE LITURGIES
*Templar knights praying out loud*
THIS ISN’T THY GRANDMOTHERES STATION
*Imagine Dragons - Radioactive starts playing*
Intelligent alien species based on bugs but specifically those moths that don’t have mouths and only live for a week after they pupate. This species’ whole conscious life is actually in the larval phase; larvae are the ones considered people, larvae are the ones with conscious and complex brains who build society, and each instar of the larva is treated as a different phase of life. Larvae become emotionally and socially and cognitively mature without ever becoming sexually mature. When they pupate, they metamorphose into something different and strange and close to mindless, with no mouth and no digestive system, whose only instincts are to mate and then quickly die. Metamorphosis is treated, functionally, like a person’s death, and the imago phase is a kind of proto-afterlife of majestic flight and the continuation of the species. Birth and death inextricably intertwined. Sex is not something people do during their lives, it’s a thing that is done as an imago after you’ve passed on from your life but before you return to the soil in death. Resultant eggs are collected by family members to raise. I think this would be fun.
i bet the pain will end if i arrange a perfect enough sentence about it
Hey kids, you need to start worrying a little less about getting “#mogged” and a little more about getting “#smogged”. This is an Air Quality Index public service announcement.
things I’ve noticed in the UK:
- when you’re jay walking, cars will actively accelerate bc the drivers want to kill you for breaking the rules
- servers in restaurants act very scared and apologetic, so maybe people aren’t nice to them here??? or I could be terrifying
- it’s really cute when little kids have British accents, but I’m unmoved by adults with accents
- extremely good gluten free options. this country is like 20 years ahead of Canada in that regard
- people will give random insignificant buildings names with little plaques. and then that’s the name that shows up on the map. like even a smaller than average family home, you can name it like it’s a dog
- lots of brick and stone buildings. looks cute and charming until you enter one and there’s no air conditioning
- people are still wearing jaguar print. I like this. don’t let it die
ohhh okay! amendment: cars will actively try to kill you for being small and made of flesh, instead of cool and metal like them
why are people giving ranni elden ring huge tits. fuck her flat doll chest like intended
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