d e v o n
Andulka
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
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Sweet Seals For You, Always
Keni
Peter Solarz
Discoholic 🪩
#extradirty
YOU ARE THE REASON
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Xuebing Du
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Monterey Bay Aquarium
trying on a metaphor
titsay
@theartofmadeline
Cosimo Galluzzi
Sade Olutola
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@666-braindead-666-blog
Goals for August/September
•gw is 125-130lbs
•get better at makeup. Play around more. Don't be afraid to try new products as long as it's within a budget.
•get a job. Start saving and budgeting
•get room put together. Get stuff organized
The fact that you control how your body looks is so triggering. Like, I wanna have the self control to drop 20lbs in a month. But it's also comforting to know I can gain however much weight I want back. But I can also lose HOWEVER MUCH I WANT. it's all in my control. I decide "do I wanna be skinny this month or thick?" Like how fucking cool is that lol. Especially since there are so many things going right now in my life that I have absolutely no control over. They just happen and I have to deal with it. But I can control my weight, my appearance, and the fucking number on the scale. I don't care how self-destructive that is, it's the only thing I have. The only decision I get to make, and the only thing that no one knows about. It's mine. This disorder is mine, even if I hate it sometimes.
Reading Dear Even Hansen 😭😭😭
I fucking love Ben Platt btw. His music is 😘👌🤧
Good morning bitches, guess who still hates themselves and really just wants to be skinny but is a fatass...me.
I just wanna go back to where I used to live
So far today I've had blueberries, almond milk with a little bit of sugar, rice with soy sauce, applesauce, some goldfish, and coffee. I feel a little nauseous but I don't know if that's just nerves. I've been super anxious because I'm constantly scared that my parents are gonna find this account, but I'm also really scared of them finding stuff in my room like journals and shit like that. Like what if my mom just randomly decides to search my room and read through my notebooks? I know she probably won't cause she's hella busy trying to get ready for the school year (she's a music teacher). But the fear is still there and it terrifies the fuck outta me. I'm hoping they also never search my phone. I have this fear that people can find everything you've ever done on your phone. Like apps you've installed and all the content you've veiwed and all the pictures you've taken and just everything you've ever done on a device from the first day you got it, even if you deleted the email and uninstalled apps and factory reset your device and encrypted your phone. It stills scares me so much and I've been dealing with this severe anxiety of my parents finding out. Uuhh I just don't know what to do. So if anyone who cared to read this could give me some advice or reassure that all my shit is safe and secure, please do. I've done everything to make sure my device has nothing on it that my parents could find, except for this account which I keep uninstalling and reinstalling because of my anxiety. Once I'm done with this phone and I can get an upgrade, I'll probably smash it. IDK, I'm just so fucking scared ajskdpcjwonsje
These past two days I've eaten like crap, and I've eaten way to much. Tomorrow I'm getting back on track tho. I wanna go running, but we'll see I guess. I'm gonna be more strict again with my eating, and I wanna start tracking/planning my food again cause I felt like that really helped and it satisfied my OCD.
My weakness. Seriously, I crave these like crazy.
For When It Gets Cold
I wanna be little and small and petite.
I wanna wrap a warm blanket around me.
I wanna sip on a warm yummy drink.
I wanna trace my bones and dream.
I wanna be the girl whose thin.
Skinny.
Small.
Dainty.
Even though...
I know I'll just end up, weak, sad, and more depressed then when I started. All I'll want is more. More bones, lower number, and less food. But I would much rather be sad in a size xs then in a size xl.
DON'T LIE TO ME
IF I ASK IF I'M FAT OR NOT, TELL ME I'M FAT CAUSE I ALREADY KNOW. HONESTLY I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I ASK EVEN THO I ALREADY KNOW I AM, BUT JUST DON'T FUCKING LIE.
Some motivating reasons why I wanna lose weight
-i can sell clothes once they get to big for me and make some extra money
-more room in bags for clothes cause they'll be smaller
-thinner arms so I won't feel so huge, and won't feel as awkward
-i won't be as cringey
-i'll have the comfort of knowing that I'm not referred to as the bigger girl when people are talking about me or pointing me out to someone
-everything will look so much cuter on me and I'll finally be somewhat satisfied with myself
-i won't be the girl who tries to eat healthy/lose weight anymore
-i won't be so embarrassed about my existence as a human being
Schools starting next week and I'm not here for it. Uuhh
Consequences-Camilla Cabello
When she sings "lost a little weight because I wasn't eating". I always get triggered as fuck and I don't know what to do about it.
weekly workouts and how to accurately calculate cals !!
these are very easy and basic workouts, obviously you can mold it to your own level of activity but if you’re just getting started in being active this is great 🤗
dm me for credit if these are your posts
stay safe loves 👼🏽
one way i avoid eating is playing minecraft. its literally so addicting wtf
Same, probs my fave game lol
Some goods I picked up for tmr. I'm starting a liquid fast. I drink unhealthy beverages on liquid fasts tho so tho probably don't do anything but whatevs. Also I need to be drinking way more water.
