Deadpool

[69bullets1taco]

An independent and selective portrayal of 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐏𝐎𝐎𝐋 comic and movie influences. 21+ MDNI possible triggers and dark themes ahead.

[icedcoffecunt]

What’s up, you ugly motherfuckers?

[69bullets1taco]

They were visited by the coke fairy. Did soldier boy get his 69 wishes? 

[icedcoffecunt]

The coke fairy got snorted however he took all of the coke after that. So now, they are set for 75 1/2 years.

All 69 wishes! Including Aunt Mae from 2002.

[69bullets1taco]

He’s going to make a such a great uncle Ben to Peter! Deadpool just knows it. He’ll teach him responsibility for coke.

Also would @madmanofthemultiverse like a chocolate chip and Coke cookie?

[madmanofthemultiverse]

He’s personally frightened to touch or eat anything cooked in this apartment. But thanks for the offer.

Hey, hey— do NOT coke up the spider kid!

[69bullets1taco]

It’s a special recipe from the guy behind the library. Very trustworthy he spoke in riddles though.

Don’t worry! He’ll take good care of everyone. He watched nanny McPhee once.

[icedcoffecunt]

Grandma Strange will be in excellent, caressing hands… Ben snorts another line of fairy dust as he offers Strange a peanut butter and crack sandwich. “Try this instead. The red condom over there made it and put love in it. Very special ingredient. Can’t get it anywhere else.”

@madmanofthemultiverse @69bullets1taco

[69bullets1taco]

He’ll DoorDash them some extra bottles of lube. Cherry flavored perhaps? Or tropical?

The special ingredient is made with love.

[icedcoffecunt]

What’s up, you ugly motherfuckers?

[69bullets1taco]

They were visited by the coke fairy. Did soldier boy get his 69 wishes? 

[icedcoffecunt]

The coke fairy got snorted however he took all of the coke after that. So now, they are set for 75 1/2 years.

All 69 wishes! Including Aunt Mae from 2002.

[69bullets1taco]

He’s going to make a such a great uncle Ben to Peter! Deadpool just knows it. He’ll teach him responsibility for coke.

Also would @madmanofthemultiverse like a chocolate chip and Coke cookie?

[madmanofthemultiverse]

He’s personally frightened to touch or eat anything cooked in this apartment. But thanks for the offer.

Hey, hey— do NOT coke up the spider kid!

[69bullets1taco]

It’s a special recipe from the guy behind the library. Very trustworthy he spoke in riddles though.

Don’t worry! He’ll take good care of everyone. He watched nanny McPhee once.

[icedcoffecunt]

What’s up, you ugly motherfuckers?

[69bullets1taco]

They were visited by the coke fairy. Did soldier boy get his 69 wishes? 

[icedcoffecunt]

The coke fairy got snorted however he took all of the coke after that. So now, they are set for 75 1/2 years.

All 69 wishes! Including Aunt Mae from 2002.

[69bullets1taco]

He’s going to make a such a great uncle Ben to Peter! Deadpool just knows it. He’ll teach him responsibility for coke.

Also would @madmanofthemultiverse like a chocolate chip and Coke cookie?

[icedcoffecunt]

What’s up, you ugly motherfuckers?

[69bullets1taco]

They were visited by the coke fairy. Did soldier boy get his 69 wishes? 

[69bullets1taco]

“Happy cracksgiving everyone.”

[icedcoffecunt]

What’s up, cum guzzlers? Miss me?

[69bullets1taco]

He had like fifty orgasms and is pregnant now.

[icedcoffecunt]

Pats him on the back and says, “You’re a weird motherfucker. It’s okay… aunt Mae is pregnant too.”

[69bullets1taco]

“Im craving some tacobell. You want some soldier daddy? And we’re having twins?!” Jolly good times!

[icedcoffecunt]

What’s up, cum guzzlers? Miss me?

[69bullets1taco]

He had like fifty orgasms and is pregnant now.

[69bullets1taco]

He found this cool decor and he’s bringing it to the apartment!

[icedcoffecunt]

Can he snort coke on it?

[69bullets1taco]

The drink or his magic fairy dust? Last time Deadpool snorted coke it burned his nose. Are you supposed to snort it cold or hot?

[69bullets1taco]

He found this cool decor and he’s bringing it to the apartment!

[69bullets1taco]

“If I was Ironman I would've had a built in goon mode, that's just me though, imagine you’re out on the battlefield and you say; ‘hey Jarvis jork that shit!.”

[icedcoffecunt]

Where is Red Condom? (He means Deadpool)

[69bullets1taco]

He’s wiping away a tear! Soldier boy’s first fourth wall break! “They grow up so fast.” Wade is talking to the invisible camera like a proud parent

[icedcoffecunt]

Ben is so confused. Perhaps it’s his drug intake or maybe this is reality. Who fucking knows. “What is this? Who the fuck is Captain America? He looks like a pussy.”

[69bullets1taco]

“He’s the less sexier version of you.” Captain America also looks like Johnny storm… he’s not sure if the others have gathered that yet. “Do you want a cokeshake to go with your book?”

[icedcoffecunt]

Where is Red Condom? (He means Deadpool)

[69bullets1taco]

He’s wiping away a tear! Soldier boy’s first fourth wall break! “They grow up so fast.” Wade is talking to the invisible camera like a proud parent

[madmanofthemultiverse]

No. No. No.

FUCK no.

[69bullets1taco]

“Picture this he’s a dying patient, and the only way you can save him is by letting my great friend, Soldier Boy, go back in time and have a romantic night with 2002 Aunt Mae. Wouldn’t you want to help save that patient, Doctor?”

[69bullets1taco]

Lettie Mae? He needs to give her a welcoming basket.

[icedcoffecunt]

“If ass wasn’t meant to be eaten? It wouldn’t be shaped like a taco. Go get ‘em tiger!”

- @69bullets1taco

“Have you heard from Aunt Mae?”

[69bullets1taco]

“Sadly, no, but I think there’s a way I can take you to her. Our caped doctor? He has some amulet thingy that’ll send you to 2002. You can get your happy ending with a ripe Aunt Mae in her golden years.” It’s motherfucking adventure time!

[icedcoffecunt]

“You’re a good fuckin’ man, Red Condom. You think Pussy Harry Potter could pull this off?” He’s taking a bite of his PB & C sandwich.

[69bullets1taco]

“Thank you, sexier Captain America.” Getting a compliment from Soldier Boy is an honor. “We’d have to convince him or get him when he’s sleeping.” Uncle Ben is the only other obstacle in Soldier Boy’s way.

[icedcoffecunt]

“If ass wasn’t meant to be eaten? It wouldn’t be shaped like a taco. Go get ‘em tiger!”

- @69bullets1taco

“Have you heard from Aunt Mae?”

[69bullets1taco]

“Sadly, no, but I think there’s a way I can take you to her. Our caped doctor? He has some amulet thingy that’ll send you to 2002. You can get your happy ending with a ripe Aunt Mae in her golden years.” It’s motherfucking adventure time!