Inexperienced T boy who thinks he’s broken. He can’t get himself off, he’s tried. So many times. He gets so worked up but he just can’t get there. And he’s tried with partners, before he knew he was a boy. They’d get frustrated or impatient and he’d get anxious and insecure. His throat would tighten with embarrassment and frustration. He’d fake an orgasm, not really sure what it was supposed to sound like, just to appease his partners.
So naturally he just figured this was life, this would be his normal. He would never know what an orgasm feels like, he would only have stories and fantasies to go off of. And now he was…something, with another trans boy. They’d make out, touch eachother under the pants, and yeah he’s gone down on this boy. But everytime he tries to reciprocate…he tells him it’s okay. That he doesn’t need it. He really doesn’t want to fake it with this guy.
“It won’t work.” He finally admits, feeling the familiar sting in his eyes. “It’s not even worth trying because I’m not designed that way. It doesn’t feel like anything to me. I like getting you off but you trying to get me off is just going to be a waste of time.”
And oh how wrong he was. After alot of coaxing and promises that he won’t be disappointed if it doesn’t happen, he relents. And he’s touched like he’s never been before. Careful hands that touch him like they’re familiar with his every nerve, knowing when and where to curl and push. He feels tingles in his spine, tiny explosions bursting off his skin. It’s unfair that he’s able to touch him like this, when he isn’t even able to touch himself like that. His head is thrown back in pleasure, hips faltering and toes curling while he cries out for his new found savior. He’s on a high that no drug could ever match, and maybe that’s why when it’s over he’s grabbing his wrist and trying to hump his hand.
“Do it again please please please do it again please oh god fuck do that again” he doesn’t even know what he’s saying, positive he’ll be embarassed about this later when his brain isn’t fogged with unimaginable pleasure.
